What should I do?

MissTLake

Im unemployed but really want to work. I have some form of social phobia. I have worked before, dealing with people because I was told the more I do it the more confident I will become. After 10 years of trying this I have actually gotten worse.
I had a temp Christmas job working in a stock room. I got to see other members of staff when they came to get stock to go out on the shop floor. This was perfect for me. I liked working on my own but also seeing the other staff now and then. I wish the job was permanent and have been applying for positions like this but theres not many about.
Do you think if I spoke to the manager directly and be brutally honest about my social anxieties they would see how dedicated and hard working I would be because I really want the job?
Im not claiming any benefits but living off savings but thats not going to last long.

DomRavioli

Firstly, see your GP - there are treatments for all kinds of anxiety, and you would be able to get a proper diagnosis and helpful treatment. You don't have to suffer with this any longer, you can get help and you can be free of it.

Secondly, speaking to a manager wouldn't do much in my view (I've been a manager previously), as if they are asking for an application form/CV then that is what they will go off, a lot of times HR decide alongside any managers or team leaders, so its a little pointless.

You may also wish to speak to your GP regarding benefits, as if you are not currently fit for work due to a health condition, you could be entitled to ESA; this would depend on having either a diagnosed condition, or receiving treatment for a condition yet to be diagnosed but is in the process of doing so - you would also need sick notes from a health professional/clinician/GP/consultant etc to claim the benefit.

the_bottler

Are you receiving any help? I have had issues in the past kind of along similar lines and generally down which I'm getting round to solving and wish I hadn't left to fester

Can I recommend you use this time whilst not in employment to work on issues so you feel 100% ready or the best you can to go back to the workplace
Please, if you've not already use this opportunity of time to seek help - it's far better to do it away from work then it is in it, I currently juggle CBT in my work breaks of current job whilst trying not to highlight it to all and sundry (it's really making me think rash decisions aren't good too!) because it is something I'd rather have done from the comfort of my sofa and own space, not outside the work doors

If you need help and have to claim benefits that's ok

xx

Pyxis

May I ask, have you been diagnosed with some form of social phobia?
Because if not, I don't think you are necessarily so very different from a lot of people.
For example, there are loads of people who work on their own, especially nowadays with the communication possibilities available, or who work 'behind the red door', often in I.T.-type jobs. I can't imagine they are all secretly wishing they were in more gregarious jobs!

Different types of jobs suit different people; some wouldn't be able to stand being out of the thick of it and working on their own in a room somewhere!

From what you've said, you sound ok to me; you were working in a back room, but had some contact with some staff, and that suited you! Sounds good to me, too!

I don't feel that it's necessary to give prospective employers any negative images of yourself, (unless they ask a direct question about it - best not to lie about something so fundamental to your nature), but rather to stress how much you enjoy that type of work, and relish being in a 'back room' environment.

Have you asked the manager of the temporary job you had, if there are now any other similar jobs going, again stressing how much you enjoyed it and miss it? He/she, on sensing your enthusiasm, may even be able to create one.

Whatever you decide, best of luck!

22cuddles

I'm not sure of your circumstances or location but would night shift in a (non 24 hour) supermarket be suitable? Contact with colleagues but minimal with the general public.

tomtontom

22cuddles wrote: »

I'm not sure of your circumstances or location but would night shift in a (non 24 hour) supermarket be suitable? Contact with colleagues but minimal with the general public.

Good idea - not sure where the OP is but some Aldi stores are now taking on night stock assistants.

MissTLake

I have not been diagnosed but I know theres something there. I have panic attacks with certain situations. I dont want to claim benefits because I really want to work. I dont think I would qualify for any benefits anyway because Im able to go out by myself. Im not ok when theres focus on me, like on the phone or dealing with a customer or doing anything where people could stop and stare.
A night shift would be great but I live in a rural area so there would be no buses that time of night and I cant drive. But thank you for the idea, its something I could look into, try figure out.

Pyxis

Hello again, MissTLake, ( love the username, by the way!)

I was thinking, are you ok with numbers and/or writing letters? I was wondering if there was someone in your area, a farmer, or a small workshop, or an artist, who needed help with general office-type stuff. I was thinking of someone who maybe worked from home, so that there wouldn't be lots of people about, or lots of customers.

Or even, maybe a farm shop that needed help with wrapping goods for sale in the shop, but where you would be in the back, not in the shop.

Or a small mail-order firm where you'd be getting orders together for mailing.

Or, if you like animals, maybe there's a kennels or a cattery, where you'd be a kennel-maid?

Some charity shops have paid employees; if there are any like that near you, they might want someone to help to sort out all the stuff.

Just a few suggestions, no probs if I'm way off beam!