Tell me it will be Ok

foxache

Hi,

I earn a decent salary (£45k) but I finally accepted after some attempts in the past that I have zero to live on (less than £100 a month disposable income not including any clothes, toiletries, hair or any other things like that). Servicing my debt is taking over my life.

I am 37 and a parent with a mortgage and a responsible job and I am humiliated and embarrassed that i have got myself into this situation and that it is my own fault. Is it normal to feel like this or do I deserve the tuts and rolling eyes that I feel i will get.

I can't live like this! I am desperately unhappy. I've contacted Payplan in the past who I thought could help me but instead they somehow suggested that I pay more back to my creditors and that I was better off contacting them individually to negotiate payment plans.

I can't live my life or be happy.

DanFish

Hi,

Youre not alone, there is no humility or embarrassment about getting into this situation, it happens to the best of us.

There will be some experts who will give you some advice soon. I would suggest you post a Statement of Affairs i'll find you the link and post it once i find it.

You've took the first step by coming here, everyone here is lovely and will you help you through whatever you are struggling with.

Chin up

DanFish

It will be ok!

DanFish

http://www.stoozing.com/calculator/soa.php

this is the SOA link.

foxache

Thanks. The SOA thing would be good

DanFish

I'd also advise you read some of the Debt Free Diaries, some are very inspirational, you'll also find a lot of great advice.
There are some fantastic people here.
Good luck

blisteringblue

Welcome Foxache, you are not alone, I also get a decent salary but also owe 60k

I'm just starting a DMP with Stepchange. I would recommend you take their 20min Debt Remedy Tool

http://www.stepchange.org/Debtremedy.aspx

Be honest, but you can be generous in the amounts you put for your outgoings, they will give you guidelines, take them all.

I did this and assuming all interest is frozen I will have it all paid off in well under 5 years. I had no chance of doing this just paying minimums every month.

I've found the whole process quite liberating, I've actually had my first default this morning which I am actually celebrating as that is one off the credit rating in 6 years. I know this is now trashed but I'm passed this fixation for maintaining my credit rating.

I've learned to budget (YNAB is your friend here) and even have money put aside for lots of things, while still paying over £1000 to my DMP this month.

I know it all seems quite daunting at first but you have taken the first step by posting on here.

susieq87

awww DanFish your advice was lovely. random.com

foxache

hi blistering blue: i've asked Stepchange to give me a call.

Thanks for your kind words

Skinnylatte

Hi foxache :hello:
I earn the same as you, and last June owed over 20k, I also felt the same as you did, but posting on here was the best thing I ever did, no-one judged me they just helped. Do an SOA, it was my first step.
If I can beat this you can too, but first of all you need to know where you are, so please please post an soa.
Things will get better I promise, and you're certainly not lone here

[Deleted User]

DanFish wrote: »

It will be ok!

More accurately, it will be OK, if you take decisive action, to deal with it.