Hi guys, Just in need of some reassurance maybe?

Redmist

Hi everyone, First time posting here, Have viewed many times but seen as our situation is not so perfect financially anymore then i think i'll be on here for some time to come

Story starts really from some time ago when i had no commitments, only the car and a few other things but nothing too major that i could afford no problem back some 6 years ago, but then i met my partner and thats kind of where things started, We met just over 5 years ago and because she was moving around the country frequently, it kind of made seeing one another quite hard and in the process financially hard but at the time neither of us really thought too much about the costs because back then all you cared about was seeing one another at whatever cost so thats where the debt started.

Fast forward just over 5 years and we have 3 children, private renting our house, and obviously things have become alot worse since then due to my partner been made redundant and bills just started piling up with both of us worried sick how we was going to pay them.

Our families have helped us no end in ways that they can but ultimately even families have limits before they can do no more and so we ended up getting a DMP just over a month ago now and the letters have already started from creditors, formal letters, and despite Stepchange trying to reassure us that its standard procedure for creditors to send these kind of letters i cant help but think that one day were going to have people at our door threatning to take our things away in front of our young children.

I have worked full time since i have left school the only time i have been unemployed was when i was 18 ( currently 29 years old ) and that was for 3 months due to been made redundant so all this happening now is new to me, and my partner and we cant help but feel like were criminals, the lowest of the low, and even though our repayments will be less, it obviously comes with big consequences, ones in which we have accepted since there's only us to blame for running up the debts we did.

On the grand scale of things we only owe just over £5k which does'nt sound alot but obviously enough for us to need a DMP.

I'm sorry it seems like i'm going on, but i cant help but think we've ruined our lives by entering into this DMP despite us knowing we needed help quickly before it got any worse and i guess all i'm wanting is to know from anybody else in the same position that everything will be alright?

cattie

Oh dear, please don't get yourself so worried. You haven't ruined your lives, you've taken the right step before your debt gets really out of hand. I think in doing that you have taken a major step towards enhancing your family life for the future.

As the parents of 3 children I personally think you have been very responsible indeed in taking this step sooner rather than later & not letting things get more out of hand as happens with so many people.

You entered the DMP in an effort to make things a bit easier for your family financially, so please try to let go of some of the stress that having desperate financial issues usually brings.

mrsscattercushion

You have my sympathies but it does get easier....the letters will drop off over time. I'd correspond with any creditors (if you have to) only in writing, inform them that SC are dealing with it all and give them the number....they can threaten all sorts, but you are doing what you can and stick with it!

Stewart_78

Don't worry so much about the letters. They will keep coming for a while. We got hundreds of them and every one was an empty threat. It will go quiet once your DMP has kicked in. It's hard but you have to just ignore them. I just filed them in a folder in case and occasionally freaked out enough to contact payplan who just told me it was all going through and to ignore them. They can't have what you haven't got.

You have trashed your credit file(s) for 6 years. That's hard with 3 kids. We are in exactly the same boat. We have good families too on both sides but it's tough when the big bills come in and you just can't get the money. Or other kids are doing this and that and you have to live with the knowledge that your kids are not and it's down to you. But hey ho. We find a lot of fun things to do that cost very little, with the odd treat.

What I would suggest is that you get serious about budgeting right now. Don't give the lenders all your spare cash, be over cautious on your budget. Try to put some money away somewhere. A few hundred or whatever, for the car repair or central heating failure etc.

Its probably not going to be much fun for the next few years on the money front unless one of you starts earning big time but it's certainly not the end of the world. We are still blessed in this country. We have free healthcare and amazing places we can visit for free.

Good luck with it. Don't get stressed about all the letters though. You will start to find that many of them contradict each other. It's all just churned out of a computer somewhere.

sickasachip13

Hi there,

Like the others said, please don't worry. You're being emminently more sensible taking control and tackling this debt before it gets bigger (I wish we'd stopped at your stage...before you know it, you owe over £40k.....). As for people turning up - I doubt it very much as the vast majority of creditors just want to know they are going to get something; if they're getting something then it's not worth them spending money sending people out to see you.

To be honest, these are very common worries amongst us DMPers; have you looked at/joined up with the DMP Mutual Support Thread here on the forum? I think it will give you reassurance. I did do an article ages ago for stepchange, which can be found here: http://moneyaware.co.uk/2011/09/my-debt-hell/ and you will see I feared the same things.

Hang in there and take pride in positive action.

SAAC x