Possibly targeted by employer

Dawinderpal

I agree entirely. It was a silly situation caused mainly by alcohol, and in my opinion should be forgotten about. I'll find out my "punishment" later this week.

duchy

When you apologized to the two girls-did they accept your apology ?

Dawinderpal

They both sent me a text that read: "Thank you for your apology" - so I'd say yes, they did.

DKLS

Bantex wrote: »

Sounds like a school playground to me and you all need to start acting like grown ups.

Sounds just like the publishing sector to me, a very cliquey and political environment. Where if your face doesn't fit you will be managed out

I never understood why they had so many alcohol fuelled events then complain when staff misbehaved.

PHILANTHROPIST

Sounds like a heat of the moment incident which arose from a misunderstanding.

That said, what exactly did you say ... the actual words ? Only then could we offer some meaningful feedback. May the words have been viewed as sexist ?

Are you certain that your witnesses (how many do you have) can corroborate your version of events ? If they are all work colleagues it's not uncommon for them to suddenly go silent when questioned by bosses and/or suddenly suffer from an acute bout of memory loss. It would be sensible to promptly get a simple written witness statement from any persons who are willing to corroborate your version of events. Get them on board before they could be intimidated by the allegedly bullying boss.

Such incidents are very common in the workplace. If you have done nothing wrong, ie clear grounds for misconduct then you will be OK.

On balance I'd never recommend apologising. It's taken by bullies as a clear admission of guilt. But fact that you have a text kind of accepting an apology may be somewhat helpful.

Please report back re words you said, if you feel able to do so. Alternatively, I'd wait and see what happens and report back. It's worrying, but you have rights.

Dawinderpal

Thank you very much for your advice Philanthropist.

I said: “We ought to use this opportunity to make contacts” followed by “I don’t mean anyone specifically” followed by “I don’t mean you specifically” and then followed by a gesture towards B when I was going to explain the situation with what happened earlier with the contact I had just made – no words were spoken with that one. Nothing that could possibly be perceived as sexist either.

I have at least one witness who is able to corroborate and who has also told me that “they took what I said the wrong way and jumped on you for it”. He has already told my manager this and I’m pretty certain he would do so again on record, but you’re right, it’s best to clarify that with him. There is another witness who I believe saw things in exactly the same way, but I’ve not had a chance to chat to him about it yet, but I will do so.

Dawinderpal

Also, would it help to state that person B has been criticised by some of my colleagues recently, and I’ve stuck up for her time and time again (although she does not know this). While colleagues in my immediate team may not wish to validate this (it’d be an admission of guilt for criticising her) I do have one witness at least – a colleague from a different department - who is willing to verify that this is indeed true.

PHILANTHROPIST

Dawinderpal wrote: »

Also, would it help to state that person B has been criticised by some of my colleagues recently, and I’ve stuck up for her time and time again (although she does not know this). While colleagues in my immediate team may not wish to validate this (it’d be an admission of guilt for criticising her) I do have one witness at least – a colleague from a different department - who is willing to verify that this is indeed true.

Based on the above and taking your statement on face value your employer would be foolish to take any action. In fact if you are investigated, based on your assertions, then A and/or B should also be subject to investigation.

Again based on the facts as presented to forum you should not even accept an informal warning, in particular, from a bullying boss.

Bullies are ,however, tenacious and do not like being stood up to. If you feel up to it I'd suggest keeping a paper trail/ diary of all historic and on-going incidents, and if need be, and in due course, raise a formal grievance.

Read this excellent ACAS link below on the subject area. It may strike a chord :

http://www.acas.org.uk/media/pdf/d/i/Bullying-and-harassment-in-the-workplace-a-guide-for-managers-and-employers.pdf

maninthestreet

Dawinderpal wrote: »

In the case of being the doorman, normally it would be an external licensed security person. In the case of the box, the contents would normally have been divided into two or three boxes and carried by two or three of us.

You need to report this as a H+S breach.

getmore4less

So the crux is the girls were flown out as eye candy on the door and they just wanted to chat to each other rather than smooze in the bar on the Sunday night.

Hinting that anyone was not pulling their weight in the smoozing game is always a bit risky especialy if it is not in your remit(telling other what to do).

It is something that needs to be done in the office, not late night in a bar in front of the potential contacts.

It seems there needs to be a meeting with the bosses to clarify what your roles are at these events, how much everyone is expected to smooze or just have a bit of post event fun.

one observation,

it seems that allthough you started a smooze with the industry contact once the girls peeled off the contact walked, obviously not that interetsed in smoozing with you then