resign or be sacked

shellyruby

Hello all
I'd like some advice about my current situation,
I've have a very nasty progressive illness for the last year called trigeminal neuralgia,its nickname is the suicide disease and has said to be the worst pain known to man and medicene.

3 weeks ago I had closed brain radiation procedure to try to damage the nerve and stop the pain,im on a very high dose of anti convulsant drugs to try to kill the nerve electric shock pain,but it can take up to 6 months to see if its worked, its not a cure ,just something to try to alleviate the pain and it can work for up to 5 years,but it isnt always successful or it could take some of the pain away,still with the need for strong drugs,because the nerve pain is in the face,sometimes its impossible to talk, eat, laugh or smile.

anyway thats a bit of background, my question is regardinh work, last year I took 5 months off sick as I was so unwell,went back and managed 2 weeks,then agreed with one of the managers(I am a superviser in the food section of a well known retailer).that I was too take 6 months unpaid leave to deal with my condition(It was so painful that it had me crying with it on the shop floor).and to wait for a possible op.the op was delayed, ihad it done 3 weeks ago and am recovering,

when I realised the op was going to be delayed,as a curtesey I wrote to work telling them that I have to stay on meds for12 weeks and I cant function at work on the meds.
they called me at home 3 days before my op stressing me out about possibly coming in for a taped meeting before my op if possible.i was on a unpaid career break for 6 months so I know they dont have the right to call me in just because I sent a letter explaining my predicament,

my unpaid leave is up this week, im due back on thursday
they know I will be calling in sick,
next week I will have to go to the dr's to get a sick note when 7 days are up, I know I will be unable to go back before 12 weeks as I will still be on the meds(thats hopefully if the op has helped)
Is my dr able to do a sick note for 12 weeks, I am under a neurologist and a neurosurgeon who did my op,

I think I have 10 weeks sick time left.when im called to the meeting I think they will ask me to resign then rejoin(like I'd do this with 15 year's service)I think I will be sacked after the 10 weeks, the company is very coporate and now has new managment in the store I work,

my hubby works at the same place and we also recieve housing benefit and tax credits..I dont intend to get goverment sickness benefit, my disease is progressive and I may have periods of remission but I think I would find it hard to work again,

do I have any other options other than me resigning, such as can I ask them to make me redundant or early retirement through ill health,altho I am only 43.
there dosent seem much point in waiting to be sacked if im not going to be claiming goverment sick,so is it just better to resign
thanks all.shelly.

Horace

They may dismiss you on grounds of capability - in that you are not capable to work. You state that you don't want to claim government sick pay, however, you could make a claim for PIP which is the new version of Disability Living Allowance especially as you have a progressive illness.

Speak to your GP and he will be able to advise on the length of time he will be able to write a note for and if he can't do a note for the full 12 weeks, then you go back before it is due and get another note.

ohreally

shellyruby wrote: »

do I have any other options other than me resigning, such as can I ask them to make me redundant or early retirement through ill health,altho I am only 43.
there dosent seem much point in waiting to be sacked if im not going to be claiming goverment sick,so is it just better to resign
thanks all.shelly.

Redundancy - you can ask, however their response may be to shrug that suggestion off as its the post not the person made redundant.

Ill health retirement - you would likely need to be a memeber of an occupational pension scheme and a request would need to be made to the scheme administrators.

Why are you averse to claiming sickness/ disabilty benefits to which you may be eligible?

shezza2

OMG Poor you.
Firstly let me say how sorry I am to hear that you have trigeminal neuralgia.
I was diagnosed with this about fifteen years ago.
for the first couple of years I was prescribed carbamazapine
and have lost count of the amount of times that the pain has brought me to my knees crying.
At one point I went to A&E but as you know the pain can go as quickly as it comes on.
My pain was triggered by smiling, shaving, talking, and even putting a phone to my ear.
The pain ( like a red hot poker) ran from my eye on the left hand side of my face right down to the back of my tongue, even a feather put to the end of my nose brought on the searing pain.
Walking into work took twice as long because I had to keep stopping because just putting
my foot on the ground caused vibration and started the pain. I even tried mincing my food to take it
through a straw because I could not open my mouth,but just touching my lip was excruciating.
Until one day the pain came on and would not go off (I’m surprised that I never OD with the amount of over the counter drugs I tried) so I was taken to hospital and for 4 days I was given morphine into my
stomach every time the pain came on. I was surprised to find out that only one nurse had heard of trigeminal neuralgia out of about ten, in the hospital and even she had not seen anyone with it. And then they came up with a concoction of drugs, carbamazapine, tramadol, gabapentine, and amatriptyline. For a few weeks a was spaced out until my body got used to that amount of drugs.
I used to drive for John Lewis so I took ill health retirement which gave me a good payment with an option of returning to work at a later date. Is this an option for you?
I don’t want to depress you any more than what the pain is doing at the moment but I was told that trigeminal neuralgia can go as quick as it comes but if it come back years later it always comes back worse that the last time,and I can tell you that it’s true.
If nothing else my reply will let you know that there is someone else out here that suffers with it.
If you would like to ask me anything about trigeminal please feel free to contact me.

Morglin

If you are in an occupational health scheme, I would let them lay you off.

Many major retailers have set procedures, and they may have an Occupational Health officer, who will give you advice regarding health and work.

I would also advise you claim ESA, as you don't know how long it will be before you can return to any sort of work.

Obviously, you can also claim PIP, although claims are taking many months to be processed.

shellyruby

Hi Shezza.
Thank you so much for your reply,comp hasnt been working so havnt been able go get on,and its so hard to use on my phone.
Shezza im so sorry you have it but was very happy to hear from you..what meds do you use now..im on pregabalin but am zinging still.Hopefully the gamma knife might alleviate pain for a bit.
Iv'e also had the same exerience what nurses and some doctors believe it or not,not knowing what it is.
Im so sorry for what you went through at the hospital.
Scary thing about this disease is that sometimes nothing wl control the pain,and you feel so zonked out.
How do you cope with it Shezza.as im writing my teeth and jaw feel like every nerve is being drilled open.i know you will k ow that fdeling.i would like to go for ill health retirment also.i dont have a pension scheme, altho the money isnt important,i can make do.im not claiming esa at the moment..but im to scared to face the air con at work.they rang me a few weeks after the gamma when i had a severe headache which neuro said was mild brain swell.
Shezza im so sorry you have had it so long.
Would you consider any surgeries.thank you,am so glad to talk to you and hope we can talk again.
Everything you said rang a bell with me.
I have accepted it now but feel am living a half life.
Have you had any remision with yours.xxx

Morglin thank you for your reply

The 1ST time they called was when i was still on my unpaid leave and it wasnt on sick at time.
They called me tonight for a first formal taped ill health meeting and i felt they were pressure me to try to come back to work before my sick note ends.dr gave me 3months sick so i would be due back in 10 weeks.
This interview was by phone.he said there will be another one in 2 weeks..are they allowed to do one so soon after the last one
I have a valid sick note and they know the situation with the radiation taking time to work.

I asked if i could come back 2 nights a week instead of 3.they said only for the rehab time 5 weeks.
They have to many supervisors there.i have a feeling they are gunning for me as they know there isnt a cure...it could come back any time..on the 1st interview the manager said about ill health retirement, if it carried on bugi dont know anything about it..

shellyruby

They also said they would like me to come into store for the next interview.i really dont feel well enough.can they force me to.the whole im of sick is because im hardly leaving the housei
Im due at the neurosurgeon on wed.told them this.
They said i should be ok to come in for an hour.
Wanted to cry at that point.
Im not very good at sticking up for myself and tend to think of things i should have said afterwoods.
I want to demand to have the meeting ovef the phone again.
I want to resign because they are making me anxious,but i know its the right way to do it.
They were most concerned that j pressed the surgeon about hkw he thinks i am.has it been succesful.when he thinks i can co e back to work.am more concerned with stopping the pain.
I really want to go back to work,but cant with this pain.
Im not sure what to do.
Thank you for your replies.it means a lot to me xx

shellyruby

O really thank you for your reply.
Im not sure if i can claim sickness at this time..do i have to be off work for a certain amount of time.
I had 5 months sick from jan to may last year.got fully paid.went back for a month,the pain was so bad i was crying.
I then took 6 months unpaid.ive had 3 weeks off sick(sick note for 12 weeks).i got paid a full amount which i think is hols.work have said they will pay me for a month,i dont know if i will get stat sick pay but i assume so...am i able to claim yet for esa.
Its not even the money.i would just love to go back to work.

shellyruby

They also said it was to early for occupational health as ive only been sick 3 weeks,even though i requested them to be involved as this condition comes under their peoples choice system as a disability.
Sorry for mistakes.so hard to type on the phone.
Thankyou

SeaLion_2

You can tell them you do not feel well enough to come into work to speak with them. Providing you don't mind, they can come and hold the meeting in your own home. If you don't want that you can suggest another phone meeting.

It being too early for occupational health in their opinion is in your favour. If they had any intention of dismissing you as soon as possible they would have shunted you off to OH by now.