The ELITE thread.The home of hugs, fun, glitches and laughter

Sunshinemummy

Borrowed from Facebook... I thought maybe some of the Elite may wish to replicate some of these as a means of diverting the SA at the SS tills!!

Next time you're in Asda (or Tesco), - keep up with the Jones's .... Dear Mrs Jones, Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Jones, are listed below and are "documented by our video surveillance cameras":

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Homewares to go off at 5- minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's toilets.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Homewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted in management getting involved causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Customer Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of crisps.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department - to which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' Emergency Medics were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the toy department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the Whole Store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the autoparts department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!

15. October 23: Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was. And last, but not least:

16. October 24: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the Staff passed out

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

FloFlo

And if you don't have a beaker in your life
http://www.fancydressball.co.uk/funny-costumes/muppets-costumes/the-muppets-beaker-costume-880584.htm?gclid=CKy6rZLosLwCFfLHtAodN0YAQg

purpledonkey

FloFlo wrote: »

Here you go a beaker with feelings
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lf3BNRF9ICc

:rotfl: funnily enough my brother mentioned the muppets when I told him how it all started.

its_a_secret_66

DeeDee74 wrote: »

DS won the DD battle Proud mummy moment sticker now reduced to clear half price scanned full price .full refund so free and some 1p headphones the Philips ones that have already been mentioned plus 1p plain black iPad cover 1p.

While waiting at cs oldish couple complained sa took iPod touch off them at till and said it had been withdrawn from sale!!
Wonder if these are cheap?
Laptop Toshiba.. C855
Pb

Wow well done

purpledonkey

I better leave to drop my brother off, he's started mentioning something closely related to Assam...

Anon

Anon wrote: »

If you have a minute, could you help please? Friends have organised a petition to try to get the speed limit reduced near their local schools/safety improvements, as the current ones are not working and there have been an increasing number of near misses. It will take a serious accident to get prioritised :mad:, but obviously no one is keen on their child getting injured or worse before action is taken.

It only takes a few seconds to enter your name and email address (you can tick to remain anonymous), I suspect most of you won't live anywhere near there but but every signature helps and everyone has a right to vote on these issues.

The link is http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/meanwood-and-community-road-safety-action-group

Thank you if you can help (note when you vote on iPetitions a donation page comes up but that is not compulsory/necessary to vote!) .

Many thanks

Anon

Ps - sorry if this isn't appropriate, if so please ignore - I just thought it worth calling on the Elite community action wing .

Thank you for your votes - if anyone else had a few seconds to spare your votes on the petition would be greatly appreciated - you can choose to remain anonymous to keep your name private.

Many thanks

Anon

DeeDee74

cheer1eader wrote: »

wow!!! good luck!! we once got charged £300 for a pack of hotdog rolls but i told the checkout lady ( this was a few years ago & kicked myself afterwards for not taking to CS & getting DTD
don't understand how age can make a difference unless it was alcohol??

:eek::eek::eek: omg what a massive DD. that would have been.. I'm always worried about trying DD if it's a huge difference in price thay always as why I didn't notice when paying and I'm a rubbish liar

mimi1234

Evening all.

Got my Givaudan perfume and also got my Bzzagent deodorants today. Such fun, well please.

Does anyone know if the Tosco are still giving out the 250 or 150 clubcard points when you buy 2 gift cards or was it £50 worth of gift cards? I need to buy some clothes from Debenhams and was just wondering if I could boost my points. Thanks in advance.

pk04

Sunshinemummy wrote: »

Borrowed from Facebook... I thought maybe some of the Elite may wish to replicate some of these as a means of diverting the SA at the SS tills!!

Next time you're in Asda (or Tesco), - keep up with the Jones's .... Dear Mrs Jones, Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Jones, are listed below and are "documented by our video surveillance cameras":

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Homewares to go off at 5- minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's toilets.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Homewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted in management getting involved causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Customer Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of crisps.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department - to which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' Emergency Medics were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the toy department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the Whole Store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the autoparts department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!

15. October 23: Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was. And last, but not least:

16. October 24: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the Staff passed out

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:
Love no. 11

Mumto2monkeys

logie wrote: »

Just been sorting through my emails and spotted the shopitize one from last week. Did anyone actually find a surprise on the app on Saturday as promised? :huh:

Nope, no change on mine:)