Advice need regarding returning to work after maternity leave

RosieDosie

Hi,

I read a lot on this forum and am seeking some advice regarding my following dilemma, any opinions would be most appreciated

I am currently on maternity and am due to return back to work in March 2014. Our baby was born 10 weeks early last May weighing just over 1lb, our little miracle boy after 16 weeks in hospital came home in August 13. He is now just over 14lb but is very tiny for his age still but he is growing well considering the start in life he had.

I approached my employer regarding returning to work part time, either 3.5 days or 4 days a week (I preferably would like to do 3.5 days), however, I get the feeling from their reply that this will not suit the business, they have stated that as I am a supervisor they would need to assess who would cover my role when I was out of the office.

I feel that our son is too young to be placed in nursery from 8 until 5.30 5 days week whilst he is so tiny still. However, feel under pressure to return full time.

What does everyone think regarding placing a baby in full time nursery and returning to work full time? Have you found their development improves (especially prem baby's?) Should I look for alternative employment with part time hours?

sew109

RosieDosie wrote: »

Hi,

I read a lot on this forum and am seeking some advice regarding my following dilemma, any opinions would be most appreciated

I am currently on maternity and am due to return back to work in March 2014. Our baby was born 10 weeks early last May weighing just over 1lb, our little miracle boy after 16 weeks in hospital came home in August 13. He is now just over 14lb but is very tiny for his age still but he is growing well considering the start in life he had.

I approached my employer regarding returning to work part time, either 3.5 days or 4 days a week (I preferably would like to do 3.5 days), however, I get the feeling from their reply that this will not suit the business, they have stated that as I am a supervisor they would need to assess who would cover my role when I was out of the office.

I feel that our son is too young to be placed in nursery from 8 until 5.30 5 days week whilst he is so tiny still. However, feel under pressure to return full time.

What does everyone think regarding placing a baby in full time nursery and returning to work full time? Have you found their development improves (especially prem baby's?) Should I look for alternative employment with part time hours?

Hi firstly I am so pleased that the little,fighter has done so well.

All I can do is tell you about our little one and nursery she started at 5 months dropping her off the first day together and the second day on my own wee the hardest of my life. However we were very happy with the nursery and she has flourished since. She is four now and through a change in circumstances she has spent only three days in nursery for the last two years. Because of her starting at Nursery so early her speech and interpersonal skills are way ahead of her age and she interacts with other children very well which is important as she is an only child and I put all this down to nursery.

I think that the key is to make sure you are happy with the nursery go to a few ignore ofsted when you walk in you will know if it is right or wrong, we were lucky as our daughters primary carer was a mum of 6 loved kids and at the time she was the only baby under 9 months. When we moved and had to go elsewhere I cried as much as I did when I dropped her off on the first day.

IMHO children who start nursery under one do far better than those who start later.

I am no expert just an over protective dad and as I soda the first day is really tough but you soon see how much the children love nursery it's tougher for the parents than the children

hawk30

I personally believe that little babies (I.e. under 2) are better at home with a parent. But we live in a world where very often both parents have to work to make ends meet. Whatever you choose to do should be right for you and your family.

getmore4less

As this is the employment board

Will you have taken all the accrued holiday by the return date?
was there any enhanced maternity that requires you to return to work.

Remind them they already have to cover holidays and sick.

How has the job been covered during maternity.

Savvy_Sue

Did you give any thought to / make any suggestions about how your supervisory role would be covered while you weren't there?

RosieDosie

Hi Thank you for all of your replies

sew109 - thank you for sharing your experience, I think I will have a look around some more nurseries and gain a feel for some more as like you say I have to be comfortable with them.

getmore4less - I am using my 2013 annual leave in February and being of March and I received SMP, therefore, believe there is no need to return to that employment. A lady has been covering my position from the customer service team and she will be moving in to another part of the company which is currently being developed which is why i feel they want me to return full time to cause less disruption.

sew109

hawk30 wrote: »

I personally believe that little babies (I.e. under 2) are better at home with a parent. But we live in a world where very often both parents have to work to make ends meet. Whatever you choose to do should be right for you and your family.

This is exactly what my view was before my daughter went to nursery now seeing her compared to friends children who have not started nursery until after 2 I disagree completely. I completely understand that not all children are the same and what works for one may not work for another but if we were to have another child even though my wife is not currently working the child would be in nursery by 1 as long as we could afford it that is how strongly I feel that my daughter has benefitted from starting nursery at a young age.

pandora205

The Maternity Alliance has some guidance about the process to request a reduction in hours here (p4)
http://maternityaction.org.uk/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderfiles/discriminationduringmaternityleave.pdf

With regard to childcare, have you considered a child minder rather than a nursery? There are some very good childminders, and some who prefer babies, so sometimes much more personalised care can be given.

RosieDosie

Pandora205 - Thank you, I will have a look through the document

Yes, I think I will have a look at child minders in my local area and contact some to arrange a visit as this maybe an option I feel more comfortable with.

Thank you for your suggestions.

FBaby

My own experience and what I have learnt from friends is that it totally depends on the child. My DD was very hard work when she was a baby. I had no choice to go back to work when she was 9 months old but couldn't face her going to nursery full-time for 5 days so was delighted when her aunt offered to look after her. Yet after only three months, she told me that she couldn't cope, that she adored her niece but she was too much work, much more than her own two children had been and she felt she couldn't stimulate as she felt she required. I had no choice but to find a nursery place for her at 12 months...and that turned out to be the best thing for her. She absolutely loved it and became so much happier. She has always been a child who needed a lot of stimulation which she got at nursery. She always managed to get the staff to adore her so always had a lot of attention and affection. She really thrived

I assumed it would be the same for my son but even though he adjusted ok, overall, if I could have done things differently, I would have stayed at home with him until he was 3. I did manage to reduce my hours slightly and re-arrange them so I had Wednesdays off so he was only there two days at a time. That really helped.

You have to go with your gut feeling or what your son needs/want rather than you. If you don't think it is going to work with you going full-time, look for another job that you could do part-time.

sew109

I would suggest that if you do look at childminders you look very carefully we considered this but decided against it for the following reasons.

There is generally only one adult there, so they are unmonitered so if they are doing something wrong no one else will know, or if something happens to them there is no one else to help them or look after the children, accident or similar.

If the childminder is ill or retires or is not available you have to make other arrangements.

You child will have less children to interact with

Child minder will not have all the facilities of a nursery.

Whilst in the nursery there will be more children your child will be assigned a key worker who will be primarily responsible for your child at the same ratio as a childminder, though if staff leave this May change.

Please don't think I am trying to say I am right anything else is wrong that really is not my intention I just hope that buy sharing what we did (and has worked very well for us) that I can help somone else