Child living with stepdad...

dj.boz

All,

I hope this is the right place to post this...

My son, who is 17 and in full time education has moved out of his mom's house and now live with his 'stepdad'.

To give more to the picture. Me and his mom (my ex) parted when he was 2 years old. I am paying my ex an amount each month and have been doing so since we seperated. Nothing has ever gone through 'the CSA'. My ex remarried, had more children and then a few years ago split with 'the stepdad'. My son has decided he no longer wants to live with his mother and whilst I do not agree with his preference, it is his choice, has decided to live with his stepdad. My son and his mom have nothing to do with each other at all now (blazing row six months ago).

Now, I am still paying my ex each month, and my (current) wife thinks that I should stop paying my ex as it is clearly not going on the upkeep of my son.

Where do I stand on this? I would like to stop paying my ex, though would simply 'bank' the money for my son for when he is older (to use towards a house, car or to help at university).

HoneyNutLoop

I take it you only have the 1 child with your ex and the money was solely for child maintenance, I.e. no spousal maintenance or inclusion of payment towards a joint loan, for example?

Are your payments made by virtue of a court order or simply an agreement made with your ex? If the latter and it was solely child maintenance for your son, I would speak to your ex about stopping the payments. The step-dad is able to put in an application for child support from you and your ex now your son is living with him (so long as your son is still in full-time non-advanced education), so you may be best now reaching a private agreement directly with him.

If the payments are made by virtue of a court order, you will need to adhere to the specific terms of your order, whatever they may be.

dj.boz

Honey,

Thanks for the reply. It is just for one child, my son, and also it is was just an arrangement between my ex and myself. No court order was involved.

Caz3121

Is the stepdad now claiming the child benefit, or is your ex still claiming it.
I agree with the poster above, payment should now go to stepdad so it is for the benefit of your son

FBaby

Are you sure she and her ex husband don't have an agreement by which she transfers what you send to him?

supersaver2

Just stop paying her and start paying the Stepdad, no need for her to be the middle man if she is giving him the money. Hopefully he will be aware that he can also put in a claim for child benefit and tax credits.

Jobseeeker

Pay it to the stepdad directly. Otherwise he could pursue you through CSA.

dj.boz

Thanks all for the replies. I will speak with the stepdad and discuss this with him. If he wants the monies directly I have no problem with that, otherwise hopefully we can 'bank' this so it will directly benefit my son.

CSAworkerx

Others have covered it, ludicrous you've been paying the mother when she has nothing to do with your son, I cant see why you didnt stop the day he packed his bags honestly, The step dad can claim as a person with care, or PEWC, but im sure if you offered him the same as you gave ure ex hed probably be happy to accept it.