What is she entitled to?

dopolous

I would not like her or the children to move out of the area as the school is very good and I feel the trauma of the split and moving anyway will be hard on my babies. I just want her to see sense and realise that she will not be in a detached house like a lot of her friends, but as long as it is comfortable and they are looked after and loved (which they will be by both of us) then they will be OK. I have not mentioned her pension to her yet. I do feel that she has plotted this, it was literall about 2 weeks after I paid the £40k onto the mortgage when the statement'I think we need to split up' emerged. I want to agree a 50/50 split of the equity, if not I will go for full financial disclosure which means she will have to get a CETV on her pension at the bank plus her current one she is paying into, I also have debts which she can have half of. If I wanted to be really nasty (which I don't) I know she has a couple of inheritences due in the next few years, I could get a share of those!
Its a bloody awful mess that I want to try to do as sensibly and painless as possible. I have been living under this for over a year now (she told me last september) since then I have had contract work, finding it hard to get a permanent job at my age (55) we had agreed to do nothing until I found one, but the situation is very bad at home and I feel it is bad for the children.

I will wait until mediation to see what she comes out with (depends what legal advice she has had).

Thank you all for the advice.

jamesd

Yes, same area is good for the children if it works out reasonably. From the level of your pension it's clear that a detached house is just going to be unaffordable when a semi or terraced place will do the job.

Good luck with it!