Too much effort on reducing and not enough on growing?

climbgirl

Redbedhead wrote: »

I know a lot of people are saying about cancelling Sky etc, but I do think it can have its place.

We don't have it because we aren't at home enough to be able to justify watching it. My brother has one of the packages and I believe it costs him about £40 per month. However, they have 3 kids under 5 and maybe go out together four times a year. £40 per month equates to £10 per week and they would struggle to find entertainment for them in the evenings and for the kids at times during the day for less than this.

They went through a stage where one of them would go out without the other at the weekend and they still do this on the odd occasion but once you factor in the cost of babysitters to the cost of going out, Sky actually seems a bargain!

This is a good point, it's all about priorities and thinking things through to make sure you're taking the sensible option. My friend has SKY purely for the football. He worked out that he was going to the pub and spending £20+ on beer at least 2 or 3 times a week to watch a game. So suddenly the £40 a month is looking far more sensible.

However, he's not in any debt, it's all about making the most of the money he spends. It's a personal choice - you either choose to forego luxuries to clear the debt asap, or take longer to pay it off and keep the luxuries.

There are some posters on this board though that can't make ends meet to even cover their debts, let alone keep things like Sky. And I think that's why some posters are so harsh on things like Sky - the posters asking for advice often need a bit of a wakeup call!

climbgirl

southernscouser wrote: »

That was well below the belt! :rotfl:

haha sorry, I use it as my benchmark now if I'm thinking of spending on something stupid - "think of the carmats, think of the carmats".

I saw some hanging up in a gas station at the weekend and burst out laughing!

southernscouser

climbgirl wrote: »

haha sorry, I use it as my benchmark now if I'm thinking of spending on something stupid - "think of the carmats, think of the carmats".

I saw some hanging up in a gas station at the weekend and burst out laughing!

I'll take that as a compliment!

Zulu_Dawn

climbgirl wrote: »

This is a good point, it's all about priorities and thinking things through to make sure you're taking the sensible option. My friend has SKY purely for the football. He worked out that he was going to the pub and spending £20+ on beer at least 2 or 3 times a week to watch a game. So suddenly the £40 a month is looking far more sensible.

However, he's not in any debt, it's all about making the most of the money he spends. It's a personal choice - you either choose to forego luxuries to clear the debt asap, or take longer to pay it off and keep the luxuries.

There are some posters on this board though that can't make ends meet to even cover their debts, let alone keep things like Sky. And I think that's why some posters are so harsh on things like Sky - the posters asking for advice often need a bit of a wakeup call!

Hi Climbgirl,

What I liked about 95% of the posts on this thread was the rationality of the argument and the quality of the debate.

I agree with so much with what has been said.

What was funny was that the famous barbecue became such a focus for attention which was never the point. Everyone can be reassured that I will never spend £75 on a barbecue whilst I am in debt (at least not in the full glare of this website).

My OP was a reaction to the SOAs where people with a whole variety of different situations laid bare their souls and their finances for scrutiny. I now think I was wrong and that this site offers a whole variety of good things but when I posted I was concerned that we had become a little narrow-minded in our responses.

The truth is that by highlighting the cost of someones gas bill or their shopping budget or their Sky subscription we are doing a valuable service. By encouraging people to do an SOA, we are providing a valuable service as I personally think understanding your costs and budgeting is about 90% of the problem.

However I originally felt that was not enough. There are people who have posted SOA's that break my heart because you can't see any way they can cut another penny and yet they are still miles away from comfort and destined for bankruptcy or losing their homes or both. To go back to Maslow, they are barely getting their safety needs. When we tell them to get rid of Sky, I'm left thinking - but they have nothing else.

Of course their are others who the moment you see their SOA, you think - I know exactly how you got into this mess - and we can get stuck in to them as their non-DFW approach leaps of the page.

The posts I really love are where we are able to actually get stuck into the behavioural aspects of people - why they are in debt, how they feel about it and how they can deal with this financial burden and the issues that have brought this about. I know that I have drawn huge strength from the support I have had recently and I have found it fascinating to see comments from people who don't necessarily know me but who are able to share some aspect of my life. A lot of the advice and suggestions have been mindblowingly accurate and useful.

This site has been such a source of strength and long may we continue to help each other in all sorts of different ways.

ZD

climbgirl

Zulu_Dawn wrote: »

What was funny was that the famous barbecue became such a focus for attention which was never the point. Everyone can be reassured that I will never spend £75 on a barbecue whilst I am in debt (at least not in the full glare of this website).

However I originally felt that was not enough. There are people who have posted SOA's that break my heart because you can't see any way they can cut another penny and yet they are still miles away from comfort and destined for bankruptcy or losing their homes or both. To go back to Maslow, they are barely getting their safety needs. When we tell them to get rid of Sky, I'm left thinking - but they have nothing else.

I know we've kind of digressed from your original post a bit and as I've said before, I think that the two-pronged approach of cutting expenses and maximising income is certainly the most effective way to cut debt. But then both those options aren't always open to every person. I know what you're saying about the "cutting all expenses" option being a bit brutal in some situations, but the cold, hard truth is that they are often making the situation much worse by continuing to spend money they haven't got on something they don't need to survive. It's not a particularly nice thing to have to say to somebody in a situation like that, but it's necessary if they want to turn things around.

SouthernScouser hit the nail right on the head when he said that getting rid of the debt involves a total mindshift, a complete change of lifestyle. You have to completely undo all the bad habits that might have got you into debt in the first place and replace them with good habits. It's a mighty struggle in a lot of cases and in that way I think it's very similar to tackling substance abuse or weight loss. But it's an interesting journey and you learn pretty quickly what's important to you. And 9 times out of 10, it isn't Sky (insert other luxuries as appropriate).

As for the bbq, I know it wasn't your original point but I think that there's some interesting patterns coming out of your posts that are off your original topic but are still important! Forgive me if I'm reading too much into this, but from the comments you've made, I'm not convinced you've truly made the attitude changes that are needed to clear the debt. You've said things like "it's only £75, that little amount will hardly impact my debt", "it'll only reduce a year off my debt-free date". Statements like that make me wonder if you're really doing everything you can to clear it - maybe there's a lot more help you could get from this site?

Sorry, I know it's off the original topic and it's completely a personal choice how someone chooses to clear the debt. But from reading your posts in this thread, I think you could get a lot more out of this site if you wanted it!