Confused debtor

dizzymicah

Hi all,
This is my first time posting, ive been lurking for years!,just hoped you all could sort my head out with regards to the debts.

I live with my partner and 16 son, I also have 2 other sons, 21 and 18 eldest is currently out of work but lives elsewhere, my middle boy is living out at uni, me and my partner work full time, and my youngest son who lives with us has just got a plumbing apprenticeship :j.

I have included an S.O.A but the problem is my partner has always classed our debts seperately, He pays his I pay mine, I pay mainly all the household bills with my wages, he give £160 per week to gas, elec, bus fares, tobacco, food. My boy gives £25.00, we were getting 107.00 tax credits but that has stopped now.

Point is should i ask my partner to put the debts together , dreading asking him to be honest, tbh a lot of the credit card debt has been spent on food, clothes and uni fees and tenners here there and everywhere to my boys when they desperate, sorry its long but just needed someone elses opinion. Thanks

S.O.A.
Rent £420 Rent:Inc. £22 towards arrears of £800
Water £88 Inc. suggested £13 towards arrears of £150
Council tax £110 Inc. suggested £15 towards arrears of £190
Gas £130
Electricity £130
Telephone/mobile/internet £25
TV licence £12
Public transport £148
Food, toiletries, cleaning £280
Pets/pet foods/insurance £20
Tobacco £22 Reduced from £44
Hairdressing £5
Clothing/footwear £40
Newspaper/magazines
Sports/hobbies/entertainment £20
Date budget created 10 Nov 2013
No of adults 1, No of dependants 1
Take home pay £840
Partner's take home pay £1,127
Rent/board received £109
Total Income £2,076
Total Expenditure £1,450
Surplus (Deficit) £626

theoretica

Your gas and electricity bills seem extremely high - can you cut down/ shop around?

The debt from uni fees and tenners to the boys - you don't say if these are your partner's sons too. Tackling the whole problem as a family sounds sensible to me, but depends on how your family works.

brightnotes

I tend to agree that if the debt was family related then it should be paid off together. Surely it affects both of your lives.

Also, unless I've read this wrong, are you paying more of the household expenses although your partner earns more?

It definitely depends on your individual circumstances but if you are both in it for the long term then I would talk to your partner about sharing the load for everything - bills and debt. After all you're a family, not flatmates.

Good luck!

dizzymicah

Hi thanks for the replies, sorry forgot to say no the boys are not my partners children, their dad hasnt give me a penny of child support since my partner moved a year and half ago, though he does help the boys out with small amounts here and there.

Gas and Eleci are on a pre -payment meter with Npower, were paying 3.00 per wk towards a debt with them also,
i am definately going to speak to my partner today about the debts and will post up tommorrow nite hopefully he'll see where were going wrong,
Thanks again for all the replies.

dizzymicah

Hi all, had our little chat last night with oh, he agreed to help clear the debts, felt great last night, agreed to hand over my credit cards and not to use them, got to be done i realise this. But tonight i got in from work and we not stopped rowing - OH advised me "He's not going to bail me out again" to which im furious - so not a happy house tonight (

i am currently online have joined Martins energy club hoping to save some money with that so im checking edf as theyve come out the best, ive also spoke to u.u about my water bill as they want 88.00 per month hoping to lesson it to be honest but dont know whether to pay it over 6mths and get it over and done with our pay it longer and pay extra of another bill-confused , anyway ive enclosed an updated S.O.A if anyone feels they can advised us of anything we can do better please feel free, thanks for all you advice, -dizzy.

dizzymicah

Hi all S.O.A I forget to put this on my last post-

This budget was created online using StepChange Debt Remedy
Housing Amount Comments
Rent £420 Rent:Inc. £22 towards arrears of £800
Water £88
Council tax £95 Arrears of £190
Gas £130
Electricity £130
Vanquis £120.00 MIN Balance £2500
Aqua- £5.00 MIN Balance £150
Wonga-£250.00
Provident £60.00 Balance £350.00
Telephone/mobile/internet £50
TV licence £12
Public transport £148
Food & Housekeeping Amount Comments
Food, toiletries, cleaning £280
School meals/meals at work
Pets/pet foods/insurance £20
Tobacco £22 Reduced from £44
Misc. Goods & Services Amount Comments
School trips/activities
Medicine/prescriptions £14
Dentist/opticians
Hairdressing £5
Clothing/footwear £40
Sports/hobbies/entertainment £20
Children's pocket money
Sundries/emergencies £16

About You Details
Date budget created 11 Nov 2013

No of adults 2
No of dependants 1

Your Income Amount
Take home pay £840
Partner's take home pay £1,127
Rent/board received £109
Total Income £2,076
Total Expenditure £1,462
Surplus (Deficit) £614