Church booking issues

JamesN

Hi,

We emailed a confirmation of a date etc to the church to which they said no problem. They didn't ask for a deposit at the time so i didnt pay one. Nor did they say i needed to pay one to secure the date.

I then emailed them on two different occasions to check the date was in the book. To which they said it was fine. They never asked me about the time.

Now i've emailed them about the time they have said there is another wedding on the day which has clearly been booked after mine. We wanted our wedding around midday to facilitate guests travelling as there is quite a far commute for some (over 2-3 hours). But we can't have near midday. We can have afternoon which is too late, or 10am which is too early.

What are my rights as everything has been booked with midday in mind? Surely they owed a duty of care to inform us as we booked first about what time we would like. I assumed we had booked the church for the whole day as with flower arrangements etc it wouldn't be practical to do two weddings in one day.

Thanks in advance

LE3

many people have a wedding at 2 or 3 pm, flows lovely into reception & evening do & lots of time for the bride to get hair etc done in the morning ...

What on earth made you think you were booking the church for the whole day?? Why on earth did you not think to clarify a time with them in your original email? Did you expect the vicar to just hang around all day waiting for you to turn up?
Many/most churches do 2 or 3 weddings on a Saturday in the popular season!

If you have your wedding at 12, what time would you like the others to have theirs, I assume you don't want them arriving as you are leaving so surely it makes more sense to both couple to have one at 10am and one at 3pm, plenty of time in the middle for no overlap!

As for flowers, why not talk to the other couple - go 50/50 on the flowers for church & save you both money - very MSE!

Why not TALK to the church rather than emailing them constantly - when is the wedding?

JamesN

LE3 wrote: »

many people have a wedding at 2 or 3 pm, flows lovely into reception & evening do & lots of time for the bride to get hair etc done in the morning ...

This would be too late in the day due to guests travelling I would have thought. Means the meal wouldn't be until at least 6, therefore the night wouldn't start till 8.

LE3 wrote: »

What on earth made you think you were booking the church for the whole day?? Why on earth did you not think to clarify a time with them in your original email? Did you expect the vicar to just hang around all day waiting for you to turn up?
Many/most churches do 2 or 3 weddings on a Saturday in the popular season!

The vicar never mentioned booking a time, just a day. I never said it was on a saturday. Its on a friday. No I think he would have other things to do during the day and would be there on time for the wedding service.

LE3 wrote: »

If you have your wedding at 12, what time would you like the others to have theirs, I assume you don't want them arriving as you are leaving so surely it makes more sense to both couple to have one at 10am and one at 3pm, plenty of time in the middle for no overlap!

As for flowers, why not talk to the other couple - go 50/50 on the flowers for church & save you both money - very MSE!

By the sounds of it their time is booked on the exact time we wanted ours. so its not a case of opposite ends of the day. Flowers are unlikely to match our colour scheme so wouldn't work

LE3 wrote: »

Why not TALK to the church rather than emailing them constantly - when is the wedding?

Believe me i've tried. I only ever get voicemail.

notanewuser

JamesN wrote: »

This would be too late in the day due to guests travelling I would have thought. Means the meal wouldn't be until at least 6, therefore the night wouldn't start till 8..

Couldn't you just condense it into 1 party then? I recently went to a wedding party where the wedding was on site at 2pm. Evening party should have started at 7:30pm but was more like 8pm because the day party overran.

JamesN wrote: »

By the sounds of it their time is booked on the exact time we wanted ours. so its not a case of opposite ends of the day. Flowers are unlikely to match our colour scheme so wouldn't work.

Nobody cares what colour the flowers in the church are. Nobody would notice if there weren't any!!!

JamesN wrote: »

Believe me i've tried. I only ever get voicemail.

Surely you're there every Sunday, when the vicar is too.

JamesN

notanewuser wrote: »

Couldn't you just condense it into 1 party then? I recently went to a wedding party where the wedding was on site at 2pm. Evening party should have started at 7:30pm but was more like 8pm because the day party overran.





Nobody cares what colour the flowers in the church are. Nobody would notice if there weren't any!!!




Surely you're there every Sunday, when the vicar is too.

The wedding isn't onsite though, and i'm sure you know how long it can take to shift people to the venue. Also means there is no time for the photo's. 8pm would be too late as will have a lot of guests coming for just the night from over 3 hours away. Seems overly unfair on them to come so far for such a small amount of time.

I agree on the flowers point but I know my partner won't!

Unfortunately, i don't live around there my partner does (main reason for so many long distance guests), good point though!

notanewuser

JamesN wrote: »

The wedding isn't onsite though, and i'm sure you know how long it can take to shift people to the venue. Also means there is no time for the photo's. 8pm would be too late as will have a lot of guests coming for just the night from over 3 hours away. Seems overly unfair on them to come so far for such a small amount of time.

I agree on the flowers point but I know my partner won't!

Unfortunately, i don't live around there my partner does (main reason for so many long distance guests), good point though!

You could just elope.

JamesN

notanewuser wrote: »

You could just elope.

Far too much money paid in deposits for that! I like your thinking though!

Sazzarella

As church's usually have a few weddings a day and you didn't specify a time when booking then id think you don't have any "rights". It might be worth getting the church to ask the other couple if they could be flexible with the time. Either that or book yours for a different time/day/find another church.

Not great but thems the breaks, make sure you specify times for any further bookings and put deposits down to hold your slots.

LE3

Unsure why you think 8pm is too late for the evening do especially on a Friday, I'd have thought several people would come after work so 8 sounds ideal ....

Simple timeline for 2pm wedding could be:
2pm wedding, over by 2:45/3, photos etc & travel to reception venue by 4:30, meal at 5, all over by 6:30, evening guests & dancing starts at 7/7:30
No hanging round between things to get bored!

JamesN

Thanks guys, we've sorted it now. Going for the 10am slot.

A lot of people will be travelling for more than 3 hours, so starting it at 8 would mean they hardly get to see us.

Thanks for the input though. Timeline was very helpful.

jenhug

your poor bride is gonna have to be up very early. I married at 2 and there was plenty of time between the sit down meal and the evening do.