What can you do with a joint loan when partners split?

tyllwyd

It seems crazy to do something that she knows will harm her career. Can't she do anything like renegotiate the term of the loan to bring the monthly payments down at least?

aliasojo

WorriedParent wrote: »

Thanks again for all the advice. It appears the only way to see any fairness in this is to advise her to default as well. Yes it will ruin her banking career prospects and yes it will ruin her credit file, but for her to pay the entire loan is not a possibility and if the bank insist on that or even expect is, then they end up with nothing and instead of writing off or chasing up 50% from the ex, they have to chase 100%. In the modern age of communication I find this difficult to understand. But I would not encourage her to pay to maintain the ex's credit status. I know you may think it's cutting one's nose off to spite their face, but in my view it's called fairness.

Incredible. You would advise your daughter to ruin her career as a first option rather than allowing her ex off scott free as it were.

I hope she ignores your advice, it's not being given with her best interests at heart, it's being given through an emotional reaction because you are annoyed.

As said above, look to see if there is a way to make this more manageable for her first, then attempt to recover money from her ex.

Her career is long term, this situation is not.

worried48

Is it worth throwing in a career for the sake of refusing to pay a loan? How big is the loan and how much are the repayments? Good jobs are not that easy to get, especially if she would be viewed as effectively making herself redundant. Is there any way you can help her out? The term "cutting off your nose to spite your face" springs to mind.

gb12345

WorriedParent wrote: »

It appears the only way to see any fairness in this is to advise her to default as well. Yes it will ruin her banking career prospects and yes it will ruin her credit file, but for her to pay the entire loan is not a possibility and if the bank insist on that or even expect is, then they end up with nothing and instead of writing off or chasing up 50% from the ex, they have to chase 100%.

So you would like to see your daughter with a CCJ, bailiffs knocking on her door and unable to get any credit (including a mortgage) for the next 6 years. That sounds like great parental advice.

As others have said, she is liable for the whole amount because those are the terms that she agreed to. If she can't afford to pay then she needs to consider refinancing the loan so that she can afford to pay it and chasing the ex through small claims for some money (if it is worth doing so).

R_P_W

WorriedParent wrote: »

Thanks again for all the advice. It appears the only way to see any fairness in this is to advise her to default as well. Yes it will ruin her banking career prospects and yes it will ruin her credit file, but for her to pay the entire loan is not a possibility and if the bank insist on that or even expect is, then they end up with nothing and instead of writing off or chasing up 50% from the ex, they have to chase 100%. In the modern age of communication I find this difficult to understand. But I would not encourage her to pay to maintain the ex's credit status. I know you may think it's cutting one's nose off to spite their face, but in my view it's called fairness.

Several times I have noticed the same point being used in your responses, i.e. that the bank will focus on getting 100% from my daughter, simply because she has the scruples to do what is right. But if she paid the full amount, the ex doesn't have to worry about anything and when you are being pushed... at some stage it's important to push back.

My daughter actually worked in recoveries for the lending bank and she told me exactly what you have all said here, but as a businessman, I find it difficult to accept, i.e. that there is no alternative and ex partner can intentionally ruin someone's life even though they are settled into married life, and caring not a jot.

I think she needs to tell the bank she has no intention of paying either and if necessary, find a new career, she's young and will recover in time and without being bullied by the ex or the bank.

Thank you all for your input, much appreciated.

WP

Sorry but there is only one word to describe what you are suggesting and that word is moronic! I can't actually believe you think that is the best course of action.

What was the loan for? What did the both spend it on?

John1993_2

WorriedParent wrote: »

My daughter actually worked in recoveries for the lending bank and she told me exactly what you have all said here, but as a businessman, I find it difficult to accept

You find it difficult to accept that she's expected to honour an areement to which she willingly signed up?

I think you'll find that there aren't many people who think it fair that she borrowed the money, agreed to pay it back, but now won't do so.

Good_Goose

Never has the phrase "cutting of your nose to spite your face" been more appropriate LOL

lynz68

To encourage your daughter to throw away a perfectly good career just to spite her ex has to be one of the most idiotic things I have read on here and I have read a lot. I hope she has the sense to ignore your "advice" .

Unfortunately in life sh*t happens none of us knows what is around the corner and working in the banking sector I'm sure your daughter was fully aware what she signed up to. If she genuinely cannot afford the current repayments she needs to look at refinancing or maybe you could offer to help her out financially.

imoneyop

Got to agree with the other posters - your "advice" is not going to help your daughter at all. What you are advising her to do is basically going to trash her life for the next 6 years.

Possible loss of job (and career) - will she be able to get another one?
Inability to get a mortgage due to default and CCJ on her credit history (and also possible difficulties getting a rental - many landlords won't rent to someone with poor credit history)

Not to mention the letters/phone calls/visits from debt collection agencies, followed by the possibility of bailiffs.

DCFC79

Only way the ex will start to pay his share of the loan is if he has a change of heart and going by your replies OP I dont think that will happen especially now he has married.

Your advice about not paying the loan is career suicide. You say " her career has been going well " so she must enjoy it, is she prepared to throw that away ?