Giving daughter a gift, stopping my money

ChillyGilly

My daughters father has been saving money for her since birth, she is now 18 and he has said because he is giving her this money she is now self sufficient and he is stopping the money he gives me (we have a mutual agreement, but it is no where near the amount he should pay) I feel like I am basically being ripped off.
It is more the principle that its what he should pay regardless of what he gives his daughter.

Own_My_Own

Is she still in education ? Do you still get child benefit for her after September ?

365days

It seems you have 3 choices if your daughter is still in full time education.

1.Contact the CSA
2. Ask daughter to give you what he gave you while she lives at home.
3. Be grateful he has saved for his daughter and leave it at that.

What do you want to do?

ChillyGilly

Yes she is in education, I do feel the amount he has saved equals what he didn't give me all these years. He has never given her anything more than the £120 a month he gave to me for her, he has always had a well paid job, so I feel like I've be fair enough (perhaps stupid enough) to not have to go through the CSA. I wouldn't want to make my daughter give me the money and be left with nothing

kevin137

The whole thing depends on what education she is in, at 18, i would guess maybe GCSE's, and A-Levels are finished, and now it is possibly Uni... Or did your daughter go a different route with college...

It makes all the difference to eligibility...

If she has finished school, and it is now UNI, then the entitlement through the CSA will be NIL.

If she is in college with a qualifying course and you are and can still be in receipt of Child Benefit while the course is ongoing, then he has a legal liability, but it sounds like you WILL have to use the CSA to collect...

It is purely your choice, people can only tell you what the implications are and the possible end result, if he is employed, then for 1 child it is a straight 15% of his net income...

Has your daughter received this money yet...? If not, i would at least wait until it is in HER account, with no access from him, then sit down and have a discussion with him, explaining what the legal implications are with the CSA and the result financially to him for his "child"...

But you need to think about it, will he hold it against your daughter if she takes the money then has the CSA go after him...? Or would the threat of the CSA be enough for him to continue until she finishes college if that is where she goes...

The more info you can give the better the advice would be on the legal side of things, the moral are a whole other story, and that is only something you can decide...

ChillyGilly

She is in full time education.

I'm really torn between saying fine give her that and I won't have anything, I'm not really in a financial position to do that, would make things a lot harder at home, and part of me knows him and his wide begrudge paying anything to my daughter, but they provide a lot for her son, her dad has always made a point of saying he provides for her, but £28 a week doesn't go far and he should be paying a lot more than that. It was never said until now that one lot of money cancelled out the other.

Can I go through the CSA after so long and just to claim for the rest of the time she is in education??

Jobseeeker

ChillyGilly wrote: »

Can I go through the CSA after so long and just to claim for the rest of the time she is in education??

yes you can do that. but only if it is a qualifying college course (not Uni)

ChillyGilly

Jobseeeker wrote: »

yes you can do that. but only if it is a qualifying college course (not Uni)

Yes it's just college thanks

Thank you also for other replies

PreludeForTimeFeelers

ChillyGilly wrote: »

Can I go through the CSA after so long and just to claim for the rest of the time she is in education??

Yup, the claim wouldn't start until when they contacted your daughter's dad, but depending on what level of course she's doing, she would be eligible for a case until she turns 20.

DACC

I'm just curious, but would this also to apply to a "child" who is away at University? So the mother gets money for the "child" whilst it is living away from home for the best part of 3 years? That's interesting.

13Kent

No it's only if they are on a non advanced education course, university is considered to be advanced education.