I've had enough

Dimey

It took me about a year to stop feeling as you do OP. I've been on my own for about 15 years. No friends or family and I avoid people when I have to go out as you never know when they are going to be nasty to you. Sooner or later they will be nasty to you.

However I really enjoy my life and have very happy times with my pets and wild creatures in the garden and holidays abroad. You can learn to adapt to whatever life throws at you and turn it into a way of life that suits your circumstances.

I'm sure I could join societies and find friends if I wanted but I'm happy as I am, even though this new life was thrust upon me rather than something I chose.

What I'm trying to explain is that you can take what's been dumped on you and think about what you really want temporarily or longer term and make it happen. You can do it quietly all on your own and feel proud of yourself.

Be happy.

mountainofdebt

OP

Just a wild and random thought here

Have you considered volunteering at say a local rescue centre

My reasons are three fold

1) It will give you a reason to get up in the morning,get dressed and get out of the house.....

2) It will give you something to talk about at interviews - if nothing else it will show that you weren't just sitting around watching Jeremy Kyle

3) When I walk the mutt, the number of people I say morning/ evening to is unbelievable - don't know any of them really (except as so-and-so's owner) but that simply act of saying morning/evening has made me realise what an insular world we've become......

Also to be honest just walking the mutt makes me think about problems in a whole different way - it's like I think about things in perspective when I'm out walking that I can't when I'm indoors.

tayforth

Dimey wrote: »

It took me about a year to stop feeling as you do OP. I've been on my own for about 15 years. No friends or family and I avoid people when I have to go out as you never know when they are going to be nasty to you. Sooner or later they will be nasty to you.

However I really enjoy my life and have very happy times with my pets and wild creatures in the garden and holidays abroad. You can learn to adapt to whatever life throws at you and turn it into a way of life that suits your circumstances.

I'm sure I could join societies and find friends if I wanted but I'm happy as I am, even though this new life was thrust upon me rather than something I chose.

What I'm trying to explain is that you can take what's been dumped on you and think about what you really want temporarily or longer term and make it happen. You can do it quietly all on your own and feel proud of yourself.

Be happy.

That's a really negative thing to say, and so untrue.

gwen80

tayforth wrote: »

That's a really negative thing to say, and so untrue.

Couldn't agree more tayforth. I believe the vast majority of people are good. They may still do things that hurt other people, unintentionally. The few that aren't good, usually have very big problems themselves.

OP - Is this your first break up? The first is always the worst, but you will get through it in time. Once you've got through the first, it's not that it hurts any less, it's just that you know you've survived before and you will survive again.

Gwenx

paulineb_2

gwen80 wrote: »

Couldn't agree more tayforth. I believe the vast majority of people are good. They may still do things that hurt other people, unintentionally. The few that aren't good, usually have very big problems themselves.

OP - Is this your first break up? The first is always the worst, but you will get through it in time. Once you've got through the first, it's not that it hurts any less, it's just that you know you've survived before and you will survive again.

Gwenx

The thing is, the poster was posting from their own experience. Yes it was negative. But from their perspective it might not have been untrue.

In my personal and professional life I have met more people who were nasty and tried to do me harm and some quite serious damage, than Ive met nice people. Spanning quite a number of years.

And I have nothing to do with people like that these days.
But thats been my life, other people's life is different and I certainly dont meet people thinking they are going to be horrible. But I dont meet them thinking they are going to be wonderful either, people are who they are and I make my choices as to who I want in my life after I get to know people.

We dont know what the poster who posted has been through to have a view that sooner or later people are going to be nasty to them. And its very sad that they feel that they need to shut themselves away rather than mix with people.

affordmylife

hi there distraughtguy

just wanted to say hello and hang in there. believe me it (you) will get better.

when I went to my dr and he said what do you want me to do I was ready with my answer.

I wanted to be signed off work and go back on my medication. which he did. I am now largely in a much better place and have returned to work.

for you maybe you weren't ready to answer the question so took it to mean 'what do you expect me to do?'. just a thought.

so what do you want to happen. how can we help you to get to that place.

please whatever you do don't do anything that will upset your mother remember she has already lost your father. do you have any siblings???

love to you on a sunday. (ps I have sons of 19 and 23) xx

Janey3

How are you feeling today, Distraughtguy?

Distraughtguy

Hi guys, Thanks for your replies, and no offence taken im pretty thick skinned.

I do want to get out and do something, my problem is im severely lacking in motivation and cant bring myself to actualy do anything creative, ive thought about volunteering but then i think otherwise...

Im feeling slightly better, not as down but im still pretty low, moping around, grumpy and irritated easily, got to see my daughter today so that cheered me up a little

paulineb_2

Your daughter, probably the biggest reason to keep on going apart from your immediate family.

marisco_2

Glad to hear you are feeling a little bit better OP. I hope you enjoyed seeing your daughter. Being around a child can be very helpful to lifting someone's mood.