Does 'no gifts' aways mean no gifts....

74jax

We asked for no gifts and genuinly meant it, not to offend anyone but that we'd been together 8 years and own two homes, so have two of everything anyway.

Close friends did get us presents - one paid for my hair to be done on the day, others bottles of wine, our MOH got us Mr & Mts hoodies as a joke etc etc. I too was overwhelmed by the generosity of our guests.

Some guests before hand had stated they 'had' to get us something and would we like cash. We then came up witht he idea of donating any money to a charity very close to our hearts.

I have to say if I go to a friend's house for a meal etc i would take a bottle of wine, maybe that's just me, so me going to a weddign would give a bottle of something should they request no presents.

I wouldnt' feel bad at all though, you did as they asked, the fact others felt uneasy not taking something shouldn't alter what you did.

Gloomendoom

Tenyearstogo wrote: »

I hate photo frames as a gift. Totally lacks imagination.

I think a frame is a very individual choice and has to match the photograph. Some people don't even like having photographs on display. It's like choosing an ornament or a painting.

I got loads when I got married as we said no gifts. People got most offended when I didn't have them on display.

A lot of people like to give gifts at weddings. We didn't need anything but were advised that we would get them anyway, probably something we didn't really want or need. To prevent this we suggested to guests that wanted to give a gift to consult my wife's mother first.

We thought it was a perfectly reasonable thing to do at the time but I remember getting absolutely flamed for it in the last big "wedding gift advice" thread. I ended up feeling that the wording on our wedding invitations should have been run past a solicitor for approval.

At least we haven't got a house full of toasters and naff photo frames.
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Torry_Quine

If someone specifically said no gifts then I would take them at their word and not give a gift.

seven-day-weekend

If I say no gifts I mean no gifts.

For our 40th wedding anniversary (ruby) the last thing we wanted was loads of tacky red glass. We said, no gifts, but if you really want to buy us something ruby coloured, buy us a bottle of red wine. If you want to spend a lot of money, buy us a crate of red wine

Giving to a charity would be good too.

ska_lover

I think that no gifts, actually means no gifts.

neverdespairgirl

If it says "no gifts", I wouldn't take one.

I'm going to a wedding tomorrow where the invite says, "no boxed gifts". I asked around for a translation, and that apparently means cash / vouchers only.

Pixiechic

If the invite states no gifts then I wouldn't take one either.

I have found that its quite expensive to be a guest at a wedding so the no gift stipulation would be fine by me

Kynthia

I don't think anyone says 'no gifts' and doesn't mean it. If they want cash there will usually be a poem, the invite will say 'no boxed gifts' or word will get round that they want cash/voucher/currency for the honeymoon.

If you feel uncomfortable not bringing a gift, perhaps they have spent a lot on their guests or the event didn't cost you much like many weddings do, then a bottle of champagne or fancy chocolates is nice. It is a consumable rather than something they'll have to keep that they didn't want.

cannyscot_2

We have had a party recently and asked for "no gifts" and folk still bought them -it was nice of them we were obv. v happy they did but I would have preferred they didnt spenf the money and just came and gave their time -whihc they did.

I'd quite like a silver wedding party but I dont want people buying lots of stuff-seems they cannot stop themselves.

Savvy_Sue

Over 30 years ago we said 'no gifts': we hadn't lived together but I was moving into his house which was fully equipped. We asked locals to bring some food for the reception.

We still got a lot of random gifts (silver plated coasters in a rack which we used as a toast rack, anyone?) but also a lot of cash in envelopes, which we hadn't expected.

I'd have been as happy without either the random gifts or the cash, although it did pay for our (cheap) honeymoon, and we were skint at the time!