Advice on what to ask for from partner upon separation

Rob_Stewart

Hi all, looking for some advice on what to ask my ex partner for now she's decided to leave me,

Setting the scene, she has decided to leave for unknown reasons? We are still friends and I believe there is no one else.

Until (and still) this point I have always been the higher earner, so I have been funding our lives in the house inc all bills and luxury items to a cost of £1600 with her contributing £350 towards this.

The mortgage cost is £900 give or take.....

Now we are no longer together she hasn't decided if she is to stay or leave the house.

Am I morally/legally right to ask her for

A) if she stays, half of the costs of the house, services, ect....Excluding food with some consideration against bills as I work from home 2 days a week.

if she leaves, then half of the mortgage only costs.

As it stands we both hold around £10k of equity in the property, I have maybe over the course of time "paid" more in by maybe £2000 but I'm not wanting to argue over that as I don't think it will help either of us mentally.

As she is jointly on the mortgage, its been her decision to leave and I'm happy to at this point share the equity.


Also when it comes to selling the property, there will be a £4000 early repayment charge with the bank, should I be looking for her to fund this out of her equity, given its been her choice?

Any help, advice welcome.

Of course once a decision has been agreed upon between us i would be insisting it is created as a legal contract by solicitors.

squeeks

Generally if you are dividing any assets or debts you split them 50/50, unless you have any pre-existing agreements in place or both agree on something else.

So with b) expect to buy her out or sell the house on the open market and split the proceeds.

With a) it's a little more tricky; Her income hasn't changed, but you are asking her to contribute more to the household than was previously considered fair within the relationship. Unless you feel very strongly about it or the costs are prohibitive and/or she has way more free spending money than you, I would let that one lie. If she starts getting pay raises at work etc.. then by all means discuss it, but it is probably safer to not expect a full 50/50 split of the bills in the short to medium term.

Rob_Stewart

We will sell and split equity 50/50 as I'm happy to do, it's about fair (me putting in more but don't want to argue)

Cash wise she does earn more, but at the time I was happy for it to be her money. She is also now out most nights whilst I'm finding it hard to buy food.

Building_Surveyor

She earns more? Then why on earth have you been funding her life of luxury. Together or not together, that needs to be nipped in the bud.

Thrugelmir

How long before the fixed term expires and the ERC is no longer applicable?

getmore4less

Rob_Stewart wrote: »

Until (and still) this point I have always been the higher earner, so I have been funding our lives in the house inc all bills and luxury items to a cost of £1600 with her contributing £350 towards this.

The mortgage cost is £900 give or take.....

Rob_Stewart wrote: »

Cash wise she does earn more, but at the time I was happy for it to be her money. She is also now out most nights whilst I'm finding it hard to buy food.

Why are you the higher eaner and she earns more cash?

£1600:£350 are you sure you have not been taken for a ride?

What was the exit plan in the agreement you set up at the start?

Perhaps you need to say this now needs to be 50:50 costs till sold if that is the plan.

getmore4less

Rob_Stewart wrote: »

Of course once a decision has been agreed upon between us i would be insisting it is created as a legal contract by solicitors.

This should have been done before you entered into this arrangment.