Ex partner refusing to pay have of mortgage

Jane1234

I split up with my partner on the 31st October 2012. By then, our mortgage was already paid for the month of November. He moved out that night, took all of his belongings and later came back for half of the furniture. He has only been in the property since to be difficult and change locks so I cannot get access.

After the split, he refused to pay any of the mortgage since I was living in the property. I tried to get the property put into my own name, get a guarantor etc, but every route I attempted to go down, he refused to co-operate. I paid the full mortgage (roughly £1000 pcm) in the months of December and January myself as he point-blank refused and I did not want my credit rating affected (I have a great credit rating, have owned my own flat from the age of 19, have no credit cards, store cards or overdrafts etc.) In February and March, I paid half of the mortgage and my solicitor contacted him asking for him to pay the remaining 50%. He refused and the mortgage went unpaid and our joint account went overdrawn. He eventually said he would pay one third of the mortgage. But this still does not cover the full amount and it remains unpaid each month with the bank charging us unrelentlessly each time as the account is overdrawn.

I am now no longer living in the property and in April I did not pay anything towards the mortgage account. I felt that he owed me a fortune and that since the beginning of our separation, I had done my best (paying the full mortgage and then agreeing to pay half) while he had paid the full total of roughly £600.00

I am now trying to market the property and I had five estate agents out to give quotations etc. My solicitor wrote to him to outline the amount the fees would be etc. I paid £499.00 to get the property on the market but he is now refusing to pay his half. I feel that I have totally hit a brick wall. I cannot get him to pay his half of the mortgage and I am unable to sell the house.

I paid about 90% of the deposit for the house as I sold my flat. He put in about £1700 from joint savings. As our mortgage has an early repayment charge of £8000 and the loan to value is very high, I will walk away with nothing! I'd even be lucky to break even! I have always worked incredibly hard to pay for my own property, came into the relationship with a lot more finance that he had to offer, and I feel i'm loosing everything I worked for in the last 11 years.

Can someone please advise?! This is now 6 months later, my credit rating is going down the tubes and I can see no way forward. Am I best to walk away and let the bank repossess? I never intend to buy another property and, although I have always really looked after my credit rating, am I best to just go bankrupt? His mother is very high up in the bank that our mortgage is with and I feel I have no clue what his game plan is - it is all very intimidating! Plus, his solicitor frequently writes to me with letters so threatening, I never thought it possible - or legal!

Any financial advice would be VERY MUCH appreciated. I tried to ask my solicitor and the bank for advice but the bank simply said that because it was 'joint and several policy' that it didn't matter who paid what towards the mortgage - just as long as it got paid.

Please help!

Dave_Ham

Hi,

It can lead to such awful situations like this when a relationship goes wrong. I am not sure the banks/solicitors do enough at times to advise clients in advance of the what if's.

In any case, have any official defaults been logged against you?

If not, your credit file is salvageable as we currently are.

With that sort of Early Repayment Charge, you do not want consider the bank voluntary repo unless you absolutely have no choice as this will not put an end to the joint debt from what you have said.

How much is the mortgage value (approx.)

How much is it marketed for?

Hoe much is the monthly mortgage payment - is this interest only or repayment?

Potentially, how much would the property rent out for?

Going to a sole name mortgage in the short term is going to be impossible from what you have said and where you are now.

Bankruptcy is an extreme measure that may or may not be necessary.

Have you thought of speaking with Mum at the bank and pleading a case for some form of arbitration as none of this is going to benefit either of you as you are both killing your credit files and neither of you can currently make a clean break.

Jane1234

I think we have officially defaulted this month. I'm sure they will have written to me but my partner has currently changed the locks and I am unable to access the property or my mail!

The mortgage value is approx £147.00

It is marketed for £160.00 (max. We paid £156.00 for it in February 2012)

The mortgage payment is £966.00 per month and it is a full repayment mortgage.

It would rent for about £700.00 a month but as we do not have a buy to let mortgage I cannot go down this route. I'm afraid to as his mum will crucify me if I do anything 'illegal.'

I have tried everything - my father even tried to phone his mum and negotiate but nothing has worked. they remain vicious and unmovable - despite the fact that it is destroying us both! I have some weird suspicion that he has a plan and that he will take me to court which is why, the whole way thorough, I have tried to do everything morally and legally right.

I just wish we could sit down and forward plan - it would take 10 minutes and life would be so much simpler! But the whole way thorough, he has refused to do this and will only communicate via his solicitor (and even then, all she keeps writing to me about is how he is unwilling to budge from his position!) I am unable to see anyway forward!

Dave_Ham wrote: »

Hi,

It can lead to such awful situations like this when a relationship goes wrong. I am not sure the banks/solicitors do enough at times to advise clients in advance of the what if's.

In any case, have any official defaults been logged against you?

If not, your credit file is salvageable as we currently are.

With that sort of Early Repayment Charge, you do not want consider the bank voluntary repo unless you absolutely have no choice as this will not put an end to the joint debt from what you have said.

How much is the mortgage value (approx.)

How much is it marketed for?

Hoe much is the monthly mortgage payment - is this interest only or repayment?

Potentially, how much would the property rent out for?

Going to a sole name mortgage in the short term is going to be impossible from what you have said and where you are now.

Bankruptcy is an extreme measure that may or may not be necessary.

Have you thought of speaking with Mum at the bank and pleading a case for some form of arbitration as none of this is going to benefit either of you as you are both killing your credit files and neither of you can currently make a clean break.

Thrugelmir

I appreciate this is an emotional time. So I apologise for my directness.

Cut your losses and exit the situation as best you can. Unless you take your ex to court ( at great expense to you both - so no winners) then you are unlikely to recover anything.

Speak to your lender , speak to the bank where you hold the joint account and keep them informed. As you need to limit the damage to yourself. Acting in a responsible manner will negate the worst from your personal perspective.

Yorkie1

As you are a joint owner, you are legally entitled to access the property. If necessary, with a locksmith.

Jane1234

'Cut your losses and exit the situation as best you can.'

Thank you for your comments! But how is the best way to cut my losses?

1. Solely pay to sell the property (which may take months with the mortgage going more and more into debt.)
2. Just go bankrupt? Hand the keys into the bank?
3. Keep fighting with solicitors and he'll probably end up taking me to court?

Thrugelmir

Rather than accrue further arrears price the property to sell. Once the property is sold. Then see where you stand.

Find_The_Real

Hello Jane, I can completely sympathise with you as I went through the same thing with my ex-partner.

In the end I had to let the mortgage company repossess which is a financial nightmare but I didn't have the money to go to court to force a sale or afford the mortgage along with rent.

The question I have would be will he sign if you get an offer on the house as if not you are just putting off the inevitable of it being repossessed anyway if you cannot afford to keep up the mortgage repayments.

I would speak to the mortgage company keeping them fully informed of the situation, make sure you have your own bank account and redirect your mail. You are entitled to gain access to the house if you so wish to as well, so two can play at lock changing.

Good luck, I totally understand how hard this situation is for you and how frustrating it is when someone you are linked to seems determined on causing as much financial mess as possible.

charleyb

You must get proper advice - go to Citizens Advice, if they can't help you, they will steer you in the direction of someone who can. What is important is whether your name is on the mortgage deeds - if that is the case, you are legally entitled to half the profit from the property, regardless of whether you are living there or not. You are also legally entitled to right of access UNLESS he has taken out a non-molestation order banning you from attending the property. Explain the situation to the bank - that is vital. If you just walk away from the situation, without talking to them, you can find yourself in the situation where you cannot get a mortgage for a minimum 10 years - I am in a similar situation and have continued paying, so that the house doesn't get repossessed and me and my kids am left homeless with no hope of a mortgage. My ex will not pay and will not sign the house over, so I am kinda stuck, but after he goes to court for assault, I plan to get legal advice to MAKE him sign - I know someone who did this and the house was ordered to be sold and the money given to my friend who has paid all the bills. I think her ex got a nominal payment, but that is for the court to decide. Good luck!

Dave_Ham

There is still enough there for this to not be a repo position, or this will have much more dramatic impact.

He cannot change the locks and not sure what purpose he is hoping to achieve.

You absolutely must try and use mutual friends/family to all sit down and broker the best way forward.

It is so short sighted of him it is unreal.

fionajbanana

I had the same experience with my ex when I dumped him. I moved back to my parents 55 miles away and he moved 4 miles to his mum, then moving to his mate a few weeks later. He did not pay a penny on the mortgage and other bills whilst the flat was up for sale - 5 months from the property going on sale to contracts exchanged and completed. The mortgage from what I can recall was about £360 pcm and the early mortgage charge was £1800.

He never bothered to co-operate with the maintenance of the garden etc. Two of the rooms needed decorating. It was me and my parents that did all of this and drove 110 mile round trip most weekends and slept on the floor on sleeping bags on a couple of occasions. My dad was working at the time and visited some clients 5 miles away and on the way home, he went to my property and mowed the lawn.

When the property sale was completed, I did a spreadsheet and deducted the costs of the mortgage, other bills, paint, hire of carpet cleaner, cost of fuel etc from his half as he did pay half of the mortgage until I dumped him and kept that amount in the joint account telling him that money is his. It was only £120. He never bothered to contact me or my parents to dispute the charges.

In hindsight, I wish I kept the £120 and got something nice from it. Well, I got about that back from the credits from my gas/leccy and CT bills.