Doubting myself? or near impossible

LottieLou

I am working myself up into an absolute stress at 2am over something that hasn't even happened yet.

In terms of having a job i am very lucky, i got my first job straight from qualifying and work as a staff nurse in neonatal intensive care. I qualified with a nursing diploma, child branch with half of my degree credits. Meaning when i qualified, I would need to do 2 modules to get my degree and still qualify for the bursary when training.

To cut a long story short, i am at the point where I need to write my dissertation, but the realisation is setting in. I have to fund the course myself (1650£), if i don't complete the unit this intake I loose all my credits and effectively have to start again.

Its not the money entirely, i average about 40-43 hours per week....doing a mix of shifts/not being able to leave on time/ staff meetings/ short staffing etc. Like many nurses, a break is rare. I usually go to the loo, eat a potato cake and hit the ground running again.

Getting to the point, I don't think I will be able to cope with life, full time + hours in a highly stressed environment and writing a dissertation in my free time. (2 girls who have tried it previously were off with stress and anxiety for months afterwards).

I am putting pressure on myself before I have even started!! and i need to stop!! Please tell me it IS possible to do everything and not loose my hair/ age prematurely/loose my marbles...im only 25!!!

Own_My_Own

I didn't want to read and run. I have no idea what this entails, but I do know you need to believe in yourself. You need to keep telling yourself you can do it, because if you don't the fear will stop you even trying. And to be honest how will you know if you can do it without giving it a go. You don't want to look back and think 'what if ?'.

I really don't have any other advice, but Good Luck.

CKhalvashi

As an NHS employee, you will be entitled to CPD time.

Staff in the hospital department my mother has run since 2005 have been allowed to merge two years into one, however it will vary by department/trust (she's a Radiologist, so no nurses per se). This wasn't the case in the department she ran before this for 15 years (same department, different hospital)

Speak to your line manager, and then to HR if you don't get anywhere.

CK

Dunroamin

Unless you have a lot of caring responsibilities outside work, writing a dissertation whilst working shouldn't be too difficult. Many lone parents work full time, bring up a family and study without having a breakdown.

What is your outside work situation?

tonyh66

do you need to complete the degree?

PRINCESSPOOR

Come on LottieLou, you can do this. Accept you have to dedicate x amount of hours to it, identify those hours and then just do it. It may be tough, it may be stressful but it has an end date so it is only short term. Enjoy the process and be proud of yourself that you are writing it. Most of all though imagine the sense of achievement you will feel when you have completed your dissertation, nothing beats the feeling of success. Good Luck LottieLou and let us know when you have written it.

GrannyKate

You can do it.
Trust me - Panic is a perfectly normal reaction when faced with a dissertation but the feeling when you hand it in is worth the stress.
I did a BA with three children and working almost full time and more recently a Masters whilst working full time. You have to set aside time to do it. I found I needed a good block of time to get started and then the same towards the end. In the middle I wrote and read when I had time. As has been said as a nurse you must have protected CPD time and I assume you are relating your dissertation topic to your work so talk to HR and the Training and Development Teams. You will also have someone from university to support and assist you with planning and developing your dissertation to keep you on the right track. The hardest part can sometimes be deciding what to write about and sticking to those parameters.
Best of luck.

Bronnie

Why don't you book your annual leave and get stuck into it then?

FBaby

I did it, working full-time whilst a single mum to two children under 5. What I found the hardest was, just as you, dealing with the anxiety and worry of not having the time. I would waste more energy thinking I wouldn't be able to do it, when actually, when I got down to it, it was half as bad as I thought.

My advice, do a little at a time. It might feel like you are not doing much when you do, when it gets to the point of really getting into it, all the little research done there and then will make the difference. Also, it is that time spent on researching that will forge your ideas and structure your dissertation. That is the most anxious part. Once you know what you are doing and how you are doing it, the rest is not so bad and can almost become motivating and pleasant.

If you decide to go ahead, you will need to work on the anxiety first as that will be your most disabling conflict. It is mentally consuming, and it is energy wasted that could have been focussed on the design of your dissertation. In the end, if you go for it, you will either get on with it or do it, or give up, stressing about it will not secure the first, but can only influence the second. Good luck.

GrannyKate

The other thing is get organised from the start referencing things as you go. Check what referencing system the university uses (although I guess you will have used it already on papers) and cross reference as you write. Do not rely on doing it at the end. The references will move with you as you add and delete bits. I had a huge pile of computer print offs and kept separate any I had quoted from to double check at the end and to see if there was a more up to date version to quote from. I also listed my bibliography as I went along.

Skywall

Nobody can tell you whether you can make it. Just plan your time well and don't press yourself too hard. If you tried your best, you would not regret then.