SOA - time to face the truth :(

LannieDuck

Thisisme wrote: »

I meant for our parents x we don't buy anything for each other for birthdays, Christmas or anything.

Ahh - the monthly presents cost includes more than just presents for the kids?

If you can, cut everything else out. You could send a card for mother's day etc to show your Mum you're thinking of her. Even better, get one of the kids to make it.

Thrifty_Pixie

Thisisme wrote: »

I haven't avoided the subject, why would I? It's my decision anyway! Stepchange allow you to have Sky, Gym Memberships, anything within reason and I personally feel £23 is reasonable as do they I assume as they know we have it?

ok, maybe not 'avoided' per se, but a number of people mentioned it, and whilst you answered their other questions you didn't mention the Sky. so let's settle on 'omitted' to answer it then. although you do seem to be a bit defensive about it.

with all due respect i suspect this 'It's my decision anyway!' attitude has contributed to getting you into this situation in the first place. i'm not judging, just stating how i see it. if i was truly serious about debt-busting i would cancel all non-essential items such as Sky and gym/class memberships and use cheaper/free options to be debt-free sooner, but that's just me.

still shocked that StepChange allow such expenses considering the level of debt, but hey ho, if you say so. i've never dealt with them but have heard from others that they're usually quite strict.

anyway. if you're serious about clearing your debts then i wish you all the luck.

Danni-R

Wouldnt your parents understand? If you had a year of giving small token gifts then you could try and bash through your debt. Your kids are young enough that they wont really remember if their presents came in a box or not. And your parents? Well I'm pretty sure they would want you to be happy and not stressed.

Thisisme_3

Thrifty_Pixie wrote: »

ok, maybe not 'avoided' per se, but a number of people mentioned it, and whilst you answered their other questions you didn't mention the Sky. so let's settle on 'omitted' to answer it then. although you do seem to be a bit defensive about it.

with all due respect i suspect this 'It's my decision anyway!' attitude has contributed to getting you into this situation in the first place. i'm not judging, just stating how i see it. if i was truly serious about debt-busting i would cancel all non-essential items such as Sky and gym/class memberships and use cheaper/free options to be debt-free sooner, but that's just me.

still shocked that StepChange allow such expenses considering the level of debt, but hey ho, if you say so. i've never dealt with them but have heard from others that they're usually quite strict.

anyway. if you're serious about clearing your debts then i wish you all the luck.

I'm sorry are you implying that I'm lying? My swim membership is a cheaper option than paying as I go when I take the children. StepChange allow a month spend for leisure and I'm sure someone else with StepChange will confirm this.

I didn't 'omitt' anything. I only saw one person mention sky and I'm forgot about it. Why on earth would I be defensive about a tv package when I have published my entire situation for all to see? We like having Sky, as parents of two young children who never get out sometimes our 'date nights' involve watching a series we've sky plussed or catching a free film.

Also pls don't say you aren't judging me as your post came across as being judgemental.

Thisisme_3

Danni-R wrote: »

Wouldnt your parents understand? If you had a year of giving small token gifts then you could try and bash through your debt. Your kids are young enough that they wont really remember if their presents came in a box or not. And your parents? Well I'm pretty sure they would want you to be happy and not stressed.

Yeah I've been thinking about this today actually and I think I'm gonna spk to all family members and ask them not to buy or us and vice versa x

RAS

Your debt is 1.4 times your annual income. Based on time on here; 1 times annual income is doable and more than that is very very hard.

Stepchange allow you a decent standard of living but you are going to take for ever to clear the debt, unless your disposable income increases a lot in the next couple of years.

Have you asked step change to review your case?

FBaby

Are you sure you are claiming the right benefits? Is this CB and TC? It sounds amazingly high for your husband income with no childcare costs, unless you claim DLA. Have you informed TC that your child isn't using childcare any longer? Just mentioning this because the last thing you would want is to be informed of an overpayment.

Thisisme_3

RAS wrote: »

Your debt is 1.4 times your annual income. Based on time on here; 1 times annual income is doable and more than that is very very hard.

Stepchange allow you a decent standard of living but you are going to take for ever to clear the debt, unless your disposable income increases a lot in the next couple of years.

Have you asked step change to review your case?

If we add our monthly excess to our payments we'd be debt free in 6 years though? This is what we plan to do. Plus going to offer F&F settlements at some point I hope. Stepchange have reviewed our situation quite recently (not since I left uni as that was only a few weeks and I needed confirmation of tax credits etc)

Do you mean you think we won't be able to pay it?

Thisisme_3

FBaby wrote: »

Are you sure you are claiming the right benefits? Is this CB and TC? It sounds amazingly high for your husband income with no childcare costs, unless you claim DLA. Have you informed TC that your child isn't using childcare any longer? Just mentioning this because the last thing you would want is to be informed of an overpayment.

I didn't get a penny towards childcare. I get £300 pm based on my husbands profit. It's weird how they work it with TC's when you are self employed. I'm currently claiming JSA as I am looking for part time work.

RAS

Thisisme wrote: »

Do you mean you think we won't be able to pay it?

That will depend on whether you can get work to replace the JSA that you will lose soon and the situation going forward.

I would certainly be pulling in the spends further than Step-change suggests and getting some emergency funding in place. What happens if OH's main contract goes belly up in the current climate?