Ex lives in our marital home - i pay mortgage!

adamkm

Thank you very much guys. Looks like I'll have to push the issue with my solicitor to resolve, so far i've been trying to push to get the child custody sorted out. My ex did say he'll make it as messy as possible for me to leave him, turns out he wasn't lying.

There's no way i could bare to live there myself with him again. Renting out a room is possible without his agreement ? i guess i could start taking things from the house, like the fridge, cooker etc. He has the car after all that i paid for

19lottie82

who is the child living with just now?

MikeR71

Well, I am afraid your only option is to make life difficult for him. As long as he is comfortable and thinks he can do as he likes without any costs to himself he will do it.

Thegirl

I don't wish to sound mean but the options you have are limited. Either:

He takes over the mortgage - why would he you are currently paying it?
You sell it - he won't agree to a price drop without a court order.
You allow it to be repossessed - one of two things will happen, either he will let it get repossessed or he will start paying to mortgage.

There is only so far you can go in making it uncomfortable for him legally. And I would make sure you are sound on the legal part before doing anything.

steeeb

Are you able to switch to an interest-only mortgage whilst all of this going on to reduce the payments by 300? a month?

adamkm

19lottie82 wrote: »

who is the child living with just now?

Its shared completely 50/50. I get her every friday, saturday, sunday and alternating tuesday and thursday. On the tuesday i have to have her over at that house until 10pm when he "relieves me", we dont speak he enters the front door, i exit the back. It was a messy break up.

adamkm

steeeb wrote: »

Are you able to switch to an interest-only mortgage whilst all of this going on to reduce the payments by 300? a month?

Yeah that's a good option. I'll try asking my building society, i asked them about a payment break but they were completely useless sadly and point blank refused. Its with Yorkshire Building Society.

adamkm

Thegirl wrote: »

I don't wish to sound mean but the options you have are limited. Either:

He takes over the mortgage - why would he you are currently paying it?
You sell it - he won't agree to a price drop without a court order.
You allow it to be repossessed - one of two things will happen, either he will let it get repossessed or he will start paying to mortgage.

There is only so far you can go in making it uncomfortable for him legally. And I would make sure you are sound on the legal part before doing anything.

Sadly yeah none of them are great i cant afford for it to be repossesed or i'll get a really really bad credit rating and never be able to get a mortgage ever again.

I chased him about the 5k offer (i offered him 5k, keep the car and all the contents) but he just text back asking if i offer a serious offer he will think about it... There's only 20k equity if it sells for the asking price, which it wont, we'll get 15k. Then there's the fee's and the capital he has to give me for the last 12 months = 5k without the car and the contents. But annoyingly he is actually really dumb and wont be able to work that out

dimbo61

Who gets the child allowance ?
Have you gone to the CSA or whatever they call it now!
Check out the website.
Stop paying all the mortgage today , put the money into a savings account with mum, dad, sister etc.
Do not pay
Move the child in with you and refuse your EX any access
Be prepared for War
Make sure you are claiming the child benefit even if you have shared care and have your child 50/50, This is very important

adamkm

dimbo61 wrote: »

Who gets the child allowance ?
Have you gone to the CSA or whatever they call it now!
Check out the website.
Stop paying all the mortgage today , put the money into a savings account with mum, dad, sister etc.
Do not pay
Move the child in with you and refuse your EX any access
Be prepared for War
Make sure you are claiming the child benefit even if you have shared care and have your child 50/50, This is very important

I havent gone to the CSA yet.

I cant stop paying the mortgage because i'll end up with defaults, CCJ's etc. I did ring them yesterday but all they offered me was to pay£110 a month but mark on my credit file as "AR" for arrangement to pay, that's worse than missed payments i heard so i cant do that.

Cant move child in with me we have a shared care arrangement which was done in court back in October, we are awaiting more court cases possibly in May, still undetermined since his legal aid has stopped.

I do claim the child benefit but its totally 50/50, can he not appeal and claim it instead if i kick up a fuss ?