Rsvp?

Faerie

We are having a small midweek wedding for immediate family and then having a bigger party at Easter to celebrate.

Our invites went out a while ago and I know everyone has received them. The problem is, hardly anyone as RSVP'd. I have heard through my parents and grandparents that certain people are coming. In some cases people are bringing plus ones who have NOT been invited. Why do they think it is ok to not reply and then invite others?! :mad:

What should I do? I have a basic numbers but don't know how accurate this is. My dad won't give me a straight answer from his side of the family - "about 25ish, 6ish children" My mum doesn't think that my cousin inviting her boyfriend of 2 weeks is a problem "she seems pretty serious about him"

Help! I don't have phone numbers, just aunties and uncles addresses. I don't have a FB account either. I don't want a food shortage but I also don't want to cater for people I have never met/invited!

74jax

I would assume if they haven't rsvp'd by the date you have given them, then you can count them as a no.

Do you speak to them at all? Can you not ask in passing the next time you talk to them if they are coming?

We are only having a small wedding of around 70, so as it's people we speak to all the time I know who is/isn't coming. They may not have written it down, but have told me. If you know what I mean.

I have had someone say they are coming with there partner and child. But I just told them their child wasn't invited. I'm not sure how you can approach this when they haven't actually said to YOU they are invited more than what you have asked.

I'd maybe try and rope in you're parents to ask when they talk to them too.

lovecake

Did you set an RSVP deadline on your invitations?

If you have addresses I would pop a little note in the post which says, 'as we have not received an RSVP from you we will assume that you are unable to make it. However, If this is not the case and you would like to attend please contact us on XXXXX by *insert a date*. I would also be temped to put a note at the bottom that says 'please note, due to restricted numbers we regret that we cannot offer a plus one'. I would just be blunt! I always was when it came to anything to do with my wedding last year! lol!

Faerie

Thanks guys! I live in a different city to my family so it makes it harder to just pop over. Naturally, I don't see them as much as I used to when I lived in my hometown. We get on well when we do meet but I've noticed it tends to be me that makes the effort - my aunties and uncles expect me to visit them but won't come to visit me. It's frustrating but I can't see that ever changing.

My mum has now agreed to chase her side and is going to put the record straight with some of them! She didn't realise how stressed and upset I was getting.

My sister has FB messaged as many as she can to chase RSVPs but so far no replies. She told them that if they don't reply then we presume they aren't coming and if they turn up on the day to not expect any food! We can see they have read the message but not responded! I shall leave it a week before I write them off.

lovecake

Glad you are getting help from your mum and sis with chasing them. It is a stressful time! Especially when you know the venue are going to be on your case for numbers and a table plan! Hope it all goes smoothly in the end!