Wedding for dummies?

mrshtobe

I just got engaged YAY!!

We have been toying around with dates, nothing set in stone yet but i would want a winter wedding....hopefully in December if he agrees!!

We have discussed budget, bearing in mind, we have only just started saving. He thinks i want something extravagant and said about £10,000. I think we can go alot lower than this and still have something nice! I was looking at Penhurst Place in Tonbridge and Cooling Castle Barn in Rochester. The packages were from $5000-£8000ish for a 2013 winter wedding (maybe i can haggle) (I know they will increase). I would really like to go lower than this if possible in Kent (I'm in Bexley but will have to travel out).

I want to spend most money on the venue, dress and rings. I will make a lot of things myself if i can.

The packages really confuse me and i don't know what to do first, is it to early to plan a 2014 wedding.Should i get a loan? Can i buy things as and when?

I really need a plan for dummies....even the stickys on here seem a bit vague!!

Faith177

I book my 2013 wedding in 2010 so no your not to early to plan in fact it helps take some of the stress out of it I found.

Try and avoid a loan if you can you don't want to spend the next 10 years paying off one day. However if you really want to not stress about saving and you can afford the repayments and take out adequate protection in case of anything going wrong then it's not a bad idea

Provided you are not the sort to change your mind often then buy as & when you like. I have had my table decorations for the past 2 years.

When I got engaged I brough a few bridal magazines to get me going Perfect Weddings & Real Life weddings (i think that's the name) are the cheapest and best in my opinion. I also brought a wedding book and planner from Waterstones. Quite a few have a checklist of all the things you need. To be really MSE try looking on Amazon or Ebay for these.

Kynthia

You need to start at the basics. First you need to have a rough idea of guest numbers as not only will it massively affect your budget but also what venues are suitable, as some will be too big or small. Secondly think about what you can realistically afford as this will influence what venues you look at but also may affect when you set your date as you may want longer to save. Thirdly start to research weddings, maybe buy some magazines, ask friends and family their experiences or borrow a book from the library. You should download some budget spreadsheets and lists of things to include. You'll be suprised how much there is to pay out for as I found my venue, food and drink was only half of my spend. Fourthly start thinking about what type of wedding you and your partner want. For example do you want a small or large one, destination or local church, barn or manor house, mid-week winter or a saturday in summer?

Once you've done the above you can start to look at some venues who have open days, but don't commit yet as you still have alot to learn. As well as seeing the different packages and style of venues, they sometimes have other suppliers so you can get ideas and it gives you and your partner a chance to talk about what you both want and like. You may find that you change your mind from what you initially thought you wanted or learn that you can't afford what you want. However there are ways to save money.

Some things you can do are make lots of things yourself, buy on ebay and don't feel you need to have all the extras. Have a mid-week wedding, pick an unpopular date or have it last minute or out of season. Keep your day guest numbers small as they cost more than evening guests. Bargain hunt and negotiate. Get married abroad as it's sometimes cheaper and less guests come. Pick a venue that isn't ususally a wedding venue as they tend to be cheaper but harder to find. If you aren't having the ceremony at the venue then it doesn't need to be licensed and you could hire any hall, hotel, garden, barn, field, restaurant, pub, etc.

faithless

First of all - Congratulations!

I agree that the package for the wedding, food, drinks and disco etc is less than half the cost of my wedding so far - eg dress, suits for groom plus any best man/users, bridesmaids outfits, rings, photographer, flowers, any transport, hair and makeup and any other beauty treatments, hen and stag parties, plus any decorations/favours/extras you fall in love with like sweetie tables or whatever. I've counted the honeymoon as separate spending, but if you're planning on having one, you'll need to bear in mind you'll have to pay for it at the same time.

Have a read through the wedding board, especially the older threads where you can follow people through the planning process and to the actual wedding, and you'll get a better idea of the planning process - and what everything costs. Do not book anything until you've got a better idea of the whole cost of the day.

Personally I'd avoid getting a loan like the plague! Whilst your wedding day should be amazing, it will be whatever you spend on it because you're getting married with your friends and family there. Can you not budget and save up until the wedding? If not how are you going go be able to afford the loan repayments after? There are lots of other boards on here that can help with budgeting and saving. If you were that you're going to spend say £12k in total and it's 12 months away then you'd need to put aside £1k per month, whereas if you put the wedding back to Dec 2014, you'd only need £500 per month.

Good luck!

Scotsbride

Congrats- firstly we had 53 to our wedding and didn't spend £10k. MSe tips put family and friends skills to use they want to help you.
like ops have said consider unusual dates.
get a complete break down and make sure this includes VAT!
get several quotes
get recommendations
DON'T get a loan fincial stress and worry is not worth starting your married life off on.

caitlineclair

I used to work in a hotel which did a lot of weddings, in which the managers really didn't care much about the arrangements and such. As a result, I've more or less single handedly arranged a fair few. Although that experience was specific to that place, I do as a result of working there have a fair bit of knowledge of how the system works in way of wedding packages and also know a whole lot of venues. If I can help in any way, I'd be happy to, just gimme a PM!