Tips on working with depression/anxiety?

earthbound_misfit

Well, what the title says really... especially after advice from anyone who's experienced it or works with people who do.
I'm on ESA at present but hoping to go back to work during next year (or at least cease claim and start looking...), pretty sure I will be declared fit by Atos at next assessment anyway. This is due to me being better day-to-day (or rather not as unstable/suicidal) because I have learnt to work around my problems. I do things when I can, rather than stressing about not fitting in with what I should be doing. (So you might find me painting the bathroom at midnight, or hiding from the world for a couple of hours during the day.) Obviosuly employment is a step away from this and having to fit in with another's timetable.

My diagnosis is vague but I know that severe depression is on there, I recognise myself I struggle with anxiety which feeds back into the depression, and it's also due to truama-type issues (not officially 'traumatic' enough for PTSD but professionals still identify this). This last bit is important because I have been suffering flashbacks much more frequently in the past few months, as well as increased nightmares. These are very mild visually but overwhelming emotionally; although I can sit down and take deep breaths and it's over, the depression engulfs me and I can't seem to think straight in terms of carrying on what I was doing/everything seems pointless.

This not being able to think straight is also an issue if I am tired - I seem to need more sleep than average, which is fine usually, but if I am significantly under this amount of sleep I am so tired it makes me feel sick, shaky, headachy and basically would lie down and go to sleep in the street if I could, such is the overwhelming desire to sleep. I have kept working before despite being really sleepy but it reaches a point where I feel physically ill and cannot really concentrate/remember instructions from one minute to the next.

The issue with concentration also occurs if I'm anxious or on the verge of tears and trying not to show it, I dissociate from reality to some extent, sometimes it can be so bad that I cannot understand what others are saying, and just want to run out of wherever and get somewhere 'safe'.

I am in general a conscientious and hard worker who wants to do the job properly; it just depends how 'fragile' I am at any given time. Some days I can relish in being smoothly polite to horrible customers, whilst another day they might leave me shaking and tearful. The tears are particularly annoying as even when I have 'mentally' kept a grip on my composure (smiling, being polite) I can't seem to stop the tears streaming.
Also a bit of an issue when the work is really boring, and I'm working alone (eg. cleaning, stacking supermarket shelves) as there's nothing to distract from the awful thoughts/feelings that can take over.

So, basically I'm after advice on:

1) Re-training sleep cycle (I'm on a regular but delayed sleep cycle at present), and getting a good night's sleep without anxiety of next day bothering me (whenever I have to set an alarm, even for something fun, I struggle to sleep and then wake up early).

2) Coping with/continuing work with flashbacks.

3) Managing to keep composure/especially not to cry.

4) As above, coping with anxiety, keeping concentrating, and how to get through boring/solo work without giving space to unwanted/intrusive thoughts.

5) Suitable job suggestions (althout I did a thread on that before), also in particular are there any training/support programs offered by the jobcentre or charities?

Sorry the post is so long, just wanted to get the issues clear so I didn't have to keep explaining stuff. Any advice more in-depth than "pull your socks up" is welcome! Thanks for reading

ps. will be beginning psychotherapy in about 6 months.

Yorkie1

Glad to hear that you're more stable at present and starting to think of the future.

I can't answer most of your specific questions, I'm afraid.

One thing which does occur to me, though, is that there appears to be a slight conflict between needing to have a job where you can hide if you're having a bad day (interacting with people can be difficult), and needing some stimulus if it's repetitive or solo work.

I suspect that the counselling may help to address some of the coping strategies you seek.

I work flexi hours and I find that it helps immensely to know that I have a certain degree of leeway if I'm having a slow morning, can't face getting up, or need to leave early with a headache.

One piece of general sleep advice (not medical) is to ensure you do go to bed at the same time each night, and to get up at a consistent time. Otherwise your body never knows if it's coming or going.

earthbound_misfit

Thanks. I do sleep regularly at present, just several hours later than usual and am trying to reset it. Hmm should go to bed now actually.
And yes it'd be brilliant to have flexi-time at work, just I'm going to have to do any job I can get my hands on for a bit so this is unlikely.
Bit worried about the effect of the therapy tbh, it'll help in the long run but will involve going over traumas which will be "upsetting" in the words of the psych.
Just hoping I can find something really as I don't want to be at the mercy of the DWP!