In a panic - flat about to be reposessed

Cool_Chick

Hi Sophistica, firstly, how is your brother? Is he ok now? Did things work out well for him? Is he still in the property? Did he have a family too? And £750k is huge! Is that gone now? I can imagine how stressful that must've been for him. And he didn't pay for nearly a year! Wow!

I'll check with Shelter/CAB tomorrow first then maybe the FSA. I really don't trust NRAM. It's the "bad bank" of Northern Rock, the half that is still owned by the taxpayer. They desperately want to get the properties off the books so they can close the company down.

And I don't need furniture and things. I just need a new kitchen, new bathroom, then carpets. I can make do with the windows and I can paint the whole thing myself, using a credit card if I need to. It's just the kitchen and bathroom are falling off the walls. I'd be so scared of a lodger getting hurt. Living room and bedrooms are ok.

And Whitewing, I will have to get to know the site better. I only really read the weekly emails. But this forum has been great. I can't believe how much stronger I feel now!

I'm going to snuggle up in bed with my baby now. It's very cold and I want to be very sharp at 8am tomorrow for Shelter then the CAB then the agents.

Thank you all so much. Happpy dreams to you all!

whitewing

Good night.

A lodger will view the place first and make their own decision about the state of it. Don't worry about everything. Deal with it as and when you can.

Good luck tomorrow. Don't be dismayed if you are raring to go and you can't get straight answers out of anyone. Keep trying. At some point you will move forward, however frustrating the process.

Sleep well.

NiftyDigits

Cool_Chick wrote: »

Ooh, Niftydigits, how do I do that? My lovely neighbour is a developer but he said he is fully booked up for 2 years. Would someone else do so? I don't know how to go about it.

Thank you Barbarawright - I'm feeling much better now! I feel quite embarrassed about my first post!

How do I get myself involved in these things??

First of all, you have to ascertain that the money is in it to make it a viable option.
Likely selling price after refurbishment, as opposed to 'pie in the sky figures'.
If it is already a conversion then I'm not sure what the scope is for a further conversion.

I'm only speaking for myself. As to how you would approach someone else, I'm not sure. Put the figures together firstly. Then it's easier for you to sell the idea.

globetraveller

I'd just like to say that I hope you have to eat your baseball cap!
Its really good to see the change in your posts today.

NiftyDigits

Will keep an eye on this thread.

techspec

And i thought i was the only person mad enough to let a cat dictate where i lived lol. People say "its only a cat". But unlike people - it will never hurt you.

I will say that money is just a piece of paper with a picture of an old lady on. Its defo not worth a life.

Its not easy dealing with creditors when you own an home with capital - as they expect you to sell it and you therefore you cannot go bankrupt. And its not easy giving up your home - as you know it will me much harder getting a mortgage now than it was. But if you can't get a lodger - downsizing is defo the best way forward. A cheap home away from the road - and your cat will still be happy.

likelyfran

Cool_Chick wrote: »

Hello,

I'm in a really bad situation financially and I'm a few weeks away from killing myself.

I have not been able to find work for 4 years now. I'm an educated, specialised office worker. I'd rather not say more than that. I've been paying my mortgage through a tax refund, Mortgage Assistance from the DWP then a large personal injury insurance payout I received.

But I now have 3 months of arrears. Approx £3k. I've been with NRAM since the start (over 7 years), and they really are terrible. In this time, I've already won 2 Financial Ombudsman Service complaints against them.

They have sent me 1 letter and are now threatening to go straight to legal proceedings. All I receive is £71.00 Jobseekers Allowance per week, but they want more than this.

I have no friends and no family. All I have is my cat.

The CAB won't respond to my emails. Shelter never answer. CCCS and National Debtline only talk about budgeting and payment plans. £71.00 per week isn't very much to faff about.

My head says that I should get the house valued, sell it quickly (even at auction), then maybe buy a caravan and live happily with my cat.

My heart says f*%k it, I can't fight anymore. Grab a bottle of whiskey then jump in the car at the dead of night and find a nice brick wall to hit. With my cat. I can't bear to leave him behind.

Has anyone else been in my position and have any constructive advice please?

No offence, but I'm really not interested in anyone saying "there, there, you'll feel better tomorrow/life is precious/you are special/speak to a helpline/go on anti-depressants" etc.

Thank you.

Um, sorry and all that but please don't kill your cat. Find him a nice home rather than do that.

And go for the caravan option - I'm sure there are other accommodation options too in 'downsizing' terms..

Cool_Chick

Hello everyone,

Ok, so what have I done today? Shelter? Have called them a few times. No reply. Will keep trying. CAB? I didn't go. Chickened out. But I have to go to the Jobcentre tomorrow so I will definitely go to the CAB afterwards. Will also use the Jobcentre phones to keep calling Shelter. Estate Agents? I'm just about to call them now. Wish me luck! I've done more cleaning. My flat is never untidy (I'm quite anal and it's safer for my cat for the place to be tidy) but it is always full of dust. It gets everywhere. It's just such an old place. And the chimney doesn't help. Have replied to official emails. Lots of other issues that I'm dealing with besides the repossession. Still waiting for BrandNewDay to respond about the cleaning jobs. Although someone did suggest that I do adult work!

And I just wanted to respond to those who think that the numbers I am talking about are lottery-esque. All I can say is that wages are higher in Central London, the cost of living is higher and property prices are astronomical. That's just basic economics. My property is actually quite cheap compared to where a lot of other people live here. And I intentionally have not told you about my line of work or experience or qualifications. But I have been repaying my mortgage for over seven years with no problems so it has been affordable to me.

And if anyone thinks that I have been anything less than honest, then I am afraid that you are very wrong. And you should not feel obliged to read and comment on my query. Do feel free to use your time doing something more beneficial for yourself.

I was in a very bad way on Saturday, having just received a threatening letter from NRAM. I have been feeling very bad for a few weeks. But the wonderful support and advice I have received from many people on here has shown me that this is not the end of the world. With their help, I can try to tackle this.

So thank you everyone, and please do keep helping me. Just don't abuse me please!

whitewing

You can and should report any post or private message that upsets you.

Do bear in mind that when things look bad and you are feeling down, people can make factual statements that can seem really harsh (especially if it isn't what you want to hear). We'll soon butt in if we think someone is being unfair to you.

Get on and contact the Estate Agents now. That seems like one of the most important jobs from what I have read on the thread.

Enzed22

Hello Cool_Chick and well done for the positive steps you've taken today.

I'm also in London and a couple of things spring to mind (they won't solve the entire problem but could be of some help to you).

* Renting out spare space within your home for storage is one option. There are websites where you can list your spare room/attic for rental and other people in the area pay to store their possessions there because, as with most of us in London, their homes are too cramped! It won't make you a fortune, but every little bit helps. I have one website address for this but I'm not sure if I'm allowed to mention it here.

* In the longer term, if you do successfully sell up, you could also consider becoming a housesitter (even with a cat!). There is a very good site, which has been getting a lot of media coverage lately, and offers jobs in many countries. Most of them involve minding other people's pets as well as their houses - but there are some available in France, for instance, where there are no pets in situ and all you've got to do is mind, say, a gite for six months in the off-season. Other jobs are for shorter terms; there's a real mixture on there. Again, not sure if I can mention the site but let me know if you want it.

* Also an idea for after the sale of your flat: London is full of opportunities re property guardianship. You look after an empty building and pay a peppercorn rent in return. This could be handy if you want to stay in London while you consider your next move. There are more opportunities than we can begin to imagine in this wonderful, expensive, cramped city - it's just a matter of finding them!

Re how to be happy - it's transient for everyone, but two practical tips that have helped me immensely are:

* Always start with what you have got. Ignore what you haven't got; it doesn't exisit. I don't even know you and I can already see that you've got a flat in London, 20 years' experience in a professional field and a cat who loves you - not to be sniffed at, any of these! Also, I'm sorry that employment has been such a problem for you recently but do remember that your skills are worth as much now as they were in 2005. No one can take the worth of that professional knowledge away from you - you've still got it, whether you're in work or out of it. On that note, have you thought of setting up on your own? It wouldn't cost anything - free website, free use of social media to market yourself, free blog to show off your knowledge.

* The second tip is to question every thought you have. Ask yourself: do I have any evidence that this is true? When you start doing this, you'll see that most of our daily thoughts are just fears in disguise. For instance, 'black cats are not as popular for fostering'. Where is the scientific study, carried out under controlled conditions, that proved beyond reasonable doubt that black cats are unpopular? It's just something you heard once and believed. You have the choice whether to believe any of these thoughts and, for me at least, happiness comes from remembering that - and constantly questioning my brain and all the stories it likes to tell me. We assume things, like 'my husband left me so my life is ruined'. Well, it's going to be a tough time, that's for sure, but where's the actual proof that your life will get worse? It might actually get better, you just don't know and that's the whole point.

* Just thought of a third one: In most cases, action - any action at all - will make you feel better than inaction. Even if you just go for a walk around the block, it's psychologically better than doing nothing.

Finally, there is one book that has been shown to help people cope with their feelings of depression - I saw a BBC 'Imagine' documentary on this where they compared so-called 'self-help' books. There was only one out of the whole lot that actually achieved results. On the basis of that, I bought that book and the practical tips I learned changed my life (I say this as a person who had a tough childhood and suffered depression, without realising what it was, from my teens onwards). I'd hand the book out on street corners if I could! The point is, if you wanted to try something like this, I would happily send you a copy (I should just say I am in no way related to the author or publisher! Oh, and it's not a 'woo'-type book either, just commonsense really). No worries if it's not your thing, but the offer's there if you want it (hopefully that is not breaking talk guidelines!).

Good luck with whatever you decide and I hope things start to look up soon.