Just got out of debt and now want a baby - are we crazy?

PrincessLou

So we weren't in a huge amount of debt but we were stuggling alot at time with money over the past few years. Over the last three years we've got married and bought a house, all of which left us with practically nothing in savings.

We've just bought a house a month ago and we're starting out a clean slate money wise. The only debt we now have is our mortgage. The thing is we would really like to start trying for a baby in 6 months time but i just don't know if we'd be plummeting ourselves back into a bad situation financially It seems like we're just seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and i don't want things to turn bad for us again.

We currently have no savings apart from a sharesave scheme that my husband is saving into to buy a new car in three years time. I know that has to change and we at least need an emergency fund in place before we'd even consider having a baby...

Can anyone give me their opinion?

Also, i know the initial outlay for a baby is expensive to buy all their bits and pieces before they're born, but can somebody enlighten me on how much their monthly spending went up (and what it was spent on) once the baby is born?

Thanks in advance!

heartbreak_star

Buy a bit of stuff at a time. Ask for Mothercare cards for birthdays and Christmas. Don't buy each other gifts for said occasions, put money in the "baby fund".

Try and survive on one salary for a while to mimic maternity leave, and save the rest.

If it was me (never will be so feel free to ignore lol) I would leave it a year to build up a fund, but others will tell you there is no real "right time" to have child.

Good luck

HBS x

MustStopSpending

If you wait until you can afford a baby you will probably never have one!

I have two children, couldn't afford either! The initial outlay is expensive, with my first I bought everything brand new (big mistake) and it costs the earth. With my second I bought second hand, saved loads & it was all still in great condition. You also get given loads from friends & family so maybe ask them to club together towards a car seat/pushchair etc rather than get given a million babygrows all in 0-3months size!

A rough guide is nappies cost about £15 a month, formula is £30ish (breast feeding is free!!) and then there's food etc when they get onto solids, it is hard to give a monthly figure though.

If you feel ready do it, my husband & I started trying as soon as we got married and looking back I kinda wish we'd had a bit longer as just husband & wife before we become mummy & daddy.

Good luck :-)

midnight_express

How old are you ?

PrincessLou

midnight_express wrote: »

How old are you ?

I'm 28 (29 in January)

midnight_express

If I was you I'd start saving as much as possible and wait a couple of years before having a baby.

lazer

Don't forget it takes 9 months - thats 9 months worth of savings

I agree with the previous poster who said to try and mimic living on maternity pay (Although you maybe have generous maternity pay?)

I do not see the harm in starting to try if it what you want, if you are worried about finances, do a plan today, seeing how much you could save over the next 9 months, and what the minimum amount you can live on is!

FireWyrm

PrincessLou wrote: »

Also, i know the initial outlay for a baby is expensive to buy all their bits and pieces before they're born, but can somebody enlighten me on how much their monthly spending went up (and what it was spent on) once the baby is born?

Thanks in advance!

You know, I see this all the time. It's the same with weddings. You buy a bunch of flowers and it costs a fiver, you say a bouquet for a wedding and you can multiply that figure by another 5. Babies are much the same (I have two and I'm working on a third in case you were wondering).

Why do people assume that having babies is somehow expensive. I can assure you, it really isnt, if you are prepared to downgrade your expectations just a little bit. Here are some options.

1) Babies grow out of everything so quickly and grandparents will insist on buying Mothers&Pappas baby-grows, if you schlep on over to your nearest car boot, I guarantee you'll find black sacks FULL of newborn clothes for (typically) between £5 and £10 each.

2) Buy a packet of general purpose baby grows every week for the duration of your pregnancy. Go for a mix of 'up to 3 months' and 'up to 6 months'.

3) Dont bother buying newborn, those only fit for the first two days...trust me.

4) Pack your hospital bag a bit at a time by the month when you have some spare pennies.

5) Babies dont eat food for at least the first 6 months. Until then, nature has provided you with two perfectly sterilised, always at the right temperature bottles...no need for mixing even. Use them. When or if you cant stand that any more, alternate with Goats Milk and baby rice. Oh, and if you do get around to bottles, dont for heavens sake buy a bottle warmer or sterilising fluid. Bottles take 10 seconds in a microwave and you give them a damned good shaking for blood temp milk. Invest in a plastic steam steriliser and use the microwave to super heat and steam bottles. If you cant afford that, check if a family member has a microwave browning dish knocking around from the 70's. Partially fill it with water, put a heavy duty 4 ltr old ice-cream tub over the top...instant make shift steriliser. Before you ask, I've done it that way when we forgot ours on holiday. To prepare bottles, do so ahead of time. This was my routine :

a) Wash all bottles, caps and teats throughly in the hotest water you can stand.
b) Rinse throughly
c) Set all 6 in the steriliser and put in microwave for 8 minutes
d) boil a kettle
e) make a cup of tea
f) when the bottles go bing, remove from microwave, swear and twitch while you set them on the side and fill each one with 6 oz of boiling water.
g) cap and set aside with the teats also capped

When you need a bottle for feeding, take one bottle, break the seal, fill with required milk powder and shake vigorously. Check for temperature and apply to apropriate orifice.

6) When babies do eat food, puree a little of your own meal...its' worked for generations, long before someone thought it was a good idea to charge extortionate amounts of money for a jar or packet. I guarantee the baby wont starve if it doesnt come from Cow&Gate despite what they might have you think.

7) Nappies...a sticky (stinky) issue. Personally, I've managed two (and soon to be three) through my old set of Tots Bots washables (picked up on ebay so god knows how old they were to start with). Having been a sceptic to begin with but had little choice due to finances, I'm now a convert and evangelist. It is no more hard work than disposables and the benefits are many. For a start, nothing to dump into a landfill (although frankly, I dont give a damn about the environment), they are cheap (one set it £200), use as many as you need (no keeping kids in nappies ALL night! Yick) and no nasty chemicals (do you know what that stuff does to bare skin?). Washing....not hard...throw them in a washing machine. Drying? Not a problem, hang them out in the summer, or hang them on the drying rack over the bath in the winter (or kitchen works too). Poo sticking? Nope, use fleece liners, nothing sticks to nylon. Gives you the jeepers thinking of all that nasty bacteria...nope...wash at 90 occassionally and babies have pretty clean guts to begin with anyway.

8) Cant afford a baby carriage? Why would you want one? they get in the way of other shoppers, are awkward on buses and are a pain to put away. Buy a Kari-Me for £45. Does wonders for the post partum flab trust me. According to my husband, who used to have the baby in it occassionally to give me a rest, they're a chick magnet too....go figure.

9) Need a cot? Ebay, Carboot, parents-in-law (lets them feel useful so dont be shy).

10) Need a baby car seat? Car boot....seriously, those places are just one stop shops for stuff other people cant be doing with.

11) Baby Blankets and cot bumpers....make your own..its not hard...honest. Pick any pregancy or craft magazine and there'll be something in there you can adapt to suit.

12) Tiredness post partum...you're on your own...we all had to do it.

See, babies dont cost anything at all unless you let it.

wannabee_in_credit

I am with the 'if you wait then there will never be a right time' brigade... I had 2, neither of which were budgeted for but because I wanted them and I wasn't getting any younger.
Unfortunately they can be expensive. You need to think about things like nursery fees if you're both going to be working (half my monthly income goes on childcare and I think I'm one of the lucky ones).
I echo what's been said though about not getting stuff new... that will save a fortune.
Good luck.
x
eta - Excellent advice from Firewyrm as always

optimistic-mummy

we are currently paying our debt off and plan to start trying as soon as the debt is cleared. we will save from starting to ttc up until we have the 20 week scan, buy second hand (except car seat and cot mattress) and i'm planning to breastfeed and cloth bum (tots bots nappies is what i want to use and washable wipes, again will try and get second hand will get the wipes off ebay). this will bring the monthly cost down. i plan on baby led weaning or blending up what we eat once LO is old enough (6 months +) this is a lot cheaper than pre made baby food, tbh i think it can cost as little or as much as you let it.
monthly cost would be less than £100 including nappies,wipes,bath supplies and formula. (if using disposable nappies and disposable wipes) the cost does creep up as they get older... buying shoes, as you go up in clothes sizes but tbh i agree with the above if you waited untill you could 'afford it' i don't think many people would have children or it would be 'too late'. its personal choice but tbh my LO is nearly 4 and it hasn't cost us a fortune. it cost us about £400 set up cost, but i did have a new cot and brand new pram system as well as loads of other stuff that i didn't use/need. most of it was brought in the sale. but i have decided with the next one i will buy the basics and buy the rest when we need it so i don't end up 'wasting' money
all a baby really needs is :
a place to sleep and bedding/blankets
clothes
car seat (compulsory at our hosp to bring them home)
nappies, cotton wool and water (our hospital dont let you use wipes anymore, but wipes will be fine for once home)
functioning breasts
**lots of love and cuddles**

i think thats all that is ''essential'' if you were going back to basics. a midwife will advise to not use lotions and washes the first few weeks but i think this again is down to personal preference, therefore i haven't listed it as tbh i didnt use anything the first few weeks as they don't really get 'dirty' as such so warm water and a cloth/sponge does the job.
more people will probably have better/more advice.
sorry i've rambled hope this helps a little xx

cyclura

I am also on the if you wait it will never happen train.. They are not expensive to kit out if you do it right. My initial outlay was less that £200 and i spend very little every month on them.

As a previous poster said, car boots are your friend. I got everything from carboots that I could find. You do not need all these fancy contraptions like the bottle warmer etc. All your baby needs is somewhere to sleep (cot or if you are co sleeping your bed), something to eat (hello boobies), some clothes, nappies and a little stimulation and love.

We purchased cloth nappies for our kiddies and I never looked back, cheaper and easier I say. I use them then wash them, I got all my nappies and covers second hand at the Nappy Tree and then I sold them again and got the next size up.

I used my boobs when I could, saved a fortune on formulas,

I made and purchased my own baby bedding

I allowed my ILs to get the cot, as they wanted to get it.

I got given a car seat (you will be given so much its crazy but let people and then pass on what you dont need or want)

I purchased all clothes and toys from car boots.

Anything else I searched for second hand on ebay and brought as and when I had spare cash

Seriously kids are for life and anything can happen financial wise in that lifetime.