Change of title but not name

Silaqui

Hi everyone,

I've posted this in 'families' but wasn't sure if it's the right place so thought I would post here too. If anyone has a definitive answer to the question below I would be very grateful!

I recently got married and will not be taking my husbands name - I sound really horrible saying this, but I don't really like it! So I'll be keeping my own name!

I do, however, want it to be clear that I am married - I was thinking about being known as Mrs Maidenname. I haven't yet got round to changing my title with anywhere yet so I am currently still Miss Maidenname. I definitely DO NOT want to be a Ms.

I was at the bank this morning as I had an appointment with a mortgage advisor, and obviously she asked me whether my name had changed. I explained the situation above (which I thought was perfectly possible) but it seemed to cause a lot of confusion...

The mortgage advisor's manager was in doing an observation of her, and she seemed to think that this wasn't possible as I would be married to my dad(?) and that for legal reasons I would have to be Ms Maidenname?

I've left it as Miss with them for now - but does anyone know what the actual situation is? I'm sure there are loads of women who have kept their own names but become Mrs - are any of you out there to reassure me?

Thanks!
x

lisajane8482

a quick google brought this up:

http://www.weddingguideuk.com/articles/legal/changingnamemarriage.asp

By the sounds of it you will be known as Ms.

themull1

You can change your name and be known as anything you like, just tell your bank your new name, and thats it. Its non of their business what you want to be known as. As long as they note the changes.

lisajane8482

Just found this which indicates you can use any title you like...

http://www.ukdp.co.uk/name-change-marriage/

I'll keep searching but I'm guessing this site is more acurate than the one I posted above

ETA:

Also see this page:

http://www.deedpoll.com/marriage.htm

antrobus

You are quite entitled to retain your maiden name and request that people refer to you as Mrs, Miss, or Ms (or indeed anything else) as the fancy takes you.

Raksha

antrobus wrote: »

You are quite entitled to retain your maiden name and request that people refer to you as Mrs, Miss, or Ms (or indeed anything else) as the fancy takes you.

So long as it's not in order to defraud somebody.

kitschkitty

Silaqui wrote: »

Hi everyone,

I've posted this in 'families' but wasn't sure if it's the right place so thought I would post here too. If anyone has a definitive answer to the question below I would be very grateful!

I recently got married and will not be taking my husbands name - I sound really horrible saying this, but I don't really like it! So I'll be keeping my own name!

I do, however, want it to be clear that I am married - I was thinking about being known as Mrs Maidenname. I haven't yet got round to changing my title with anywhere yet so I am currently still Miss Maidenname. I definitely DO NOT want to be a Ms.

I was at the bank this morning as I had an appointment with a mortgage advisor, and obviously she asked me whether my name had changed. I explained the situation above (which I thought was perfectly possible) but it seemed to cause a lot of confusion...

The mortgage advisor's manager was in doing an observation of her, and she seemed to think that this wasn't possible as I would be married to my dad(?) and that for legal reasons I would have to be Ms Maidenname?

I've left it as Miss with them for now - but does anyone know what the actual situation is? I'm sure there are loads of women who have kept their own names but become Mrs - are any of you out there to reassure me?

Thanks!
x

Silly bank people! You can Be Mrs your surname - after all your husband could have chosen to be Mr your surname if he wanted - wouldn't make him any less married!

I've noticed a lot of service (banks etc) and utilities are very old fashioned - I've always dealt with all our finances and household stuff (hubby earns the money though) and before we were married poor hubby received more than one phone call/letter calling him Mr my maiden name even though I was clearly Miss!

Also the amount of people who live with someone other than just a spouse these days (be it partners, friends, house shares etc) it amazes me how many companies send you stuff with names of phrases in that assume your household is a married couple. :eek:

wxy

I am intending to do the same (actually, it never occurred to me that I wouldn't be able to call myself Mrs Maiden name...) so would also appreciate any comments/past experience etc

Dekazer

Good grief, what an old fashioned attitude. I certainly hope the above posters are correct and you can call yourself whatever you like.

Or you could do a quick PhD and call yourself Dr. Then not only will they not known if you're married, they won't even be able to tell you're a woman! HA!

(I chose to remain Ms Maidenname because I hate the idea of changing my name, and as men remain Mr I prefer to remain Ms. I have been Ms since I was old enough to hate 'Miss' - about 12! I sort of regret not doing a doctorate before getting married, simply so we could have had the pleasure of being announced as Mr and Dr )

Silaqui

Raksha wrote: »

So long as it's not in order to defraud somebody.

I won't I promise

kitschkitty wrote: »

Silly bank people! You can Be Mrs your surname - after all your husband could have chosen to be Mr your surname if he wanted - wouldn't make him any less married!

Good point with that one!

Dekazer wrote: »

Good grief, what an old fashioned attitude. I certainly hope the above posters are correct and you can call yourself whatever you like.

Or you could do a quick PhD and call yourself Dr. Then not only will they not known if you're married, they won't even be able to tell you're a woman! HA!

(I chose to remain Ms Maidenname because I hate the idea of changing my name, and as men remain Mr I prefer to remain Ms. I have been Ms since I was old enough to hate 'Miss' - about 12! I sort of regret not doing a doctorate before getting married, simply so we could have had the pleasure of being announced as Mr and Dr )

Ah I love(d?) being a Miss - makes me feel young haha!

Thanks for all the replies everyone one, and for going to the trouble of looking things up for me - I had done similar searches before which was why I was planning to do the Mrs Maidenname thing, it's just the bank woman confused me by saying it wasn't allowed!

WXY I've asked the same question on the families board so might be worth a look - funny but on there lots of people asked why I wasn't taking his name (or variations on that) strange how the answers from different areas of the site are different, must be the different types of people in each area. The general consensus was the same though, that I should be able to change title but not name if I wanted to.


I think I will have to do a bit of ringing round and start changing title officially so that it's on a few documents.

Thanks again everyone
x

kitschkitty

I just thought of another point too - say you had a common surname like Smith and your partner did too - then you'd still just be changing your title!