recovering from employment tribunal stress

downbutnotout10

Hello all,

I was wondering if anyone can offer some advice and support...

My case against my former employer went to the Tribunal last autumn and, though they settled, several months later I am still struggling to come to terms with the stress of it all.

I know, I probably sound weak and over sensitive but I still hurt from it all. From sitting next to a terrifying barrister and legal team that left me feeling bullied to hearing former colleagues tell lie after lie about me... To the injustice of it all.

I find it so heartbreaking all these months later... I know I sound naive but the character assassination was painful.

I feel my experience with my previous employer, the two years leading up to the case and the case itself turned me from a happy, positive and confident person to a tearful, pathetic, frightened and anxious person.

Am I the only one to have experienced this? How have others recovered from the stress without becoming bitter and jaded.

Any advice at all would be appreciated.

Thank you.

Takeaway_Addict

Go get some counseling.

ILW

downbutnotout10 wrote: »

Hello all,

I was wondering if anyone can offer some advice and support...

My case against my former employer went to the Tribunal last autumn and, though they settled, several months later I am still struggling to come to terms with the stress of it all.

I know, I probably sound weak and over sensitive but I still hurt from it all. From sitting next to a terrifying barrister and legal team that left me feeling bullied to hearing former colleagues tell lie after lie about me... To the injustice of it all.

I find it so heartbreaking all these months later... I know I sound naive but the character assassination was painful.

I feel my experience with my previous employer, the two years leading up to the case and the case itself turned me from a happy, positive and confident person to a tearful, pathetic, frightened and anxious person.

Am I the only one to have experienced this? How have others recovered from the stress without becoming bitter and jaded.

Any advice at all would be appreciated.

Thank you.

Half the world feel bitter and jaded, just get on with your life.

MargB

Although I've not had to take a former employer to tribunal, I can imagine that the whole experience was extremely stressful. I (amongst others) experienced bullying at the hands of a former manager (I can finally admit it) over a couple of years and despite grievances etc, nothing was done about it (except to lift the carpet quickly to sweep it all under). It got me to the point where I was on anti-depressants, so I can sympathise.

Fortunately I'm out of there now and much happier in my current job. However, I still, after three years, get days when I wake up with severe anxiety attacks, I cannot stand crowds and I still have very low esteem and confidence. Such has been the effect on me even after this time, so I can understand how you are still feeling very low.

It's horrible to have former fellow workers that you may have thought were 'on your side' give an unrecognisable account of you. If they were still working for the company, they may have had to be careful of what they said...... I don't know the background.

What I can see is that you need some help here. You appear to still be feeling very low and stressed about it. You may have depression. Can I urge you to go and talk to your doctor about all of this. They will be able to diagnose the situation and hopefully get some counselling for you where you can talk things through and put them in some sort of perspective so you can then took to move forwards.

All the best for the future. At least you are away from your former employer now and can take actions to build yourself a better future

downbutnotout10

MargB wrote: »

Although I've not had to take a former employer to tribunal, I can imagine that the whole experience was extremely stressful. I (amongst others) experienced bullying at the hands of a former manager (I can finally admit it) over a couple of years and despite grievances etc, nothing was done about it (except to lift the carpet quickly to sweep it all under). It got me to the point where I was on anti-depressants, so I can sympathise.

Fortunately I'm out of there now and much happier in my current job. However, I still, after three years, get days when I wake up with severe anxiety attacks, I cannot stand crowds and I still have very low esteem and confidence. Such has been the effect on me even after this time, so I can understand how you are still feeling very low.

It's horrible to have former fellow workers that you may have thought were 'on your side' give an unrecognisable account of you. If they were still working for the company, they may have had to be careful of what they said...... I don't know the background.

What I can see is that you need some help here. You appear to still be feeling very low and stressed about it. You may have depression. Can I urge you to go and talk to your doctor about all of this. They will be able to diagnose the situation and hopefully get some counselling for you where you can talk things through and put them in some sort of perspective so you can then took to move forwards.

All the best for the future. At least you are away from your former employer now and can take actions to build yourself a better future

Thank you MargB - thank you for sharing your own experience and the very good advice.

I have an appointment with my doctor at the end of this week and I will take your advice and ask for some help.

Thank you so so much.

Your reply has helped me understand a little more how I am feeling.

All the best, downbutnotout

Racheldevon

I'm not sure what field you work within, but I would recommend seeing a clinical supervisor, and/or seeing a UKCP or BACP registered therapist to work through some of the difficulties you mention. You may have to wait a long time on the NHS, so it would be worth considering other options. Many towns have low cost counselling/therapy centres (usually anywhere from £10 per session upwards)