A Dilema - any advice anyone?

moonlightpjs

I won't go in to too much detail as it will take ages so I'll try and cut the story short. I was induced when I had my 7 year old son as he was two weeks overdue. Needless to say things didn't go to plan and had a lot of problems and didn't see him for 3 days, really poorly, couldn't hold him etc.

Anyway, 2 weeks later came home, didn't want him, felt I didn't love him and was eventually diagnosed with PND and PTSD, had a very lovely midwide who saw me for over ten weeks and she encourged me to write to NHS to ask why what had happened had happened. Did this and was fobbed off, wrote to Head of Wifery and again fobbed off.

Evenutally saw a solicitor in the hopes that he could get an explanation and maybe an apology for me. The solicitor advised me to sue for Clinical Negligence which I then did. Over the next 7 years we found out a lot about what had happened, why etc and were also given the runaround by the NHS - they admitted liabilty but not fault ITMS. Saw lots of doctors and professionals over the years - sent to by both by my solicitor and the NHS's. Suffered 6 miscarriges as a result of this negligence and had surgery. Fell pregnant with my daughter in 2005, had a complicated pregnancy but was looked after by an OB very well indeed, he delivered her by CS two weeks early last year and everything went according to plan - no problems - home within 2 days. Love that man!!!

Anyway, today the NHS Teaching Trust have made me an offer of settlement - great, at last things are getting to the end. But here is the dilema, my solicitor says its a good offer and knows we need the money - it would pay all our debts off and leave us some to save. Payment would be made within 2 months. But.............he also says that if I refuse the offer they could make a higher offer but that could take possibly months, even a year. Or we could have our day in court - but there is the possibility that a Judge could rule that they settle for less than they have now offered. We are managing now with hubbys wages, my benefits, tax credits etc and the majority of our creditors are happy with our own DMP and we are hardly receiving any threatening phonecalls/letters. So, my fellow (wise) DFW's, do we:

A: Accept the settlement and be debt free in about 2 months
B: Refuse the offer and hope they make a higher one and also hope it doesn't take too long, if it does then we just continue as we are until we get the settlement.
C: Have our day in court

I must stress however, that I will not get the one thing I really wanted which was a letter of apology and explanation. My solicitor says if we need the money urgently then accept the offer but if we can wait then to hold out for a further offer as you should never accept the first offer.

Any advice very much appreciated , thank you

immoral_angeluk

If it were me I'd accept the first offer if it were enough to clear our debt. But obviously it's a tricky situation but I hope you can come to a decision you're happy with. x

Sea78

ooh a difficult one - I too would be tempted to take the offer. However, is it likely that you would get an apology even if it did go to court in the future? Also if you got less than you have been offered now, further down the line, how would you feel about this? Would you need the closure of a court case, which might not go your way?

Good luck - I think only you can make this decision and it's going to be hard - hugs to you.

Sea xxxx

moonlightpjs

I know, all I can think about is being debt free completely in a couple of months - it would be amazing and we could start living our lifes again. That was my first thought when my Solicitor rang but , oh, I don't like buts and I cant seem to think straight. Debt Free - first and most important option always but I could end up with more money - do I take the chance? My heads swimming

moonlightpjs

Sea78 wrote: »

ooh a difficult one - I too would be tempted to take the offer. However, is it likely that you would get an apology even if it did go to court in the future? Also if you got less than you have been offered now, further down the line, how would you feel about this? Would you need the closure of a court case, which might not go your way?

Good luck - I think only you can make this decision and it's going to be hard - hugs to you.

Sea xxxx

I am not going to get a letter of apology which ever way I do it and thats the thing I really want so in my little head I'm sort of thinking, "Well, I am not going to get an apology so take them for every penny I can"

saffronflowers

Gosh I can really sympathise with you, spent four years attempting to get my eldest daught fobbed off here there and everywhere till it was discovered she had Cystic Fibrosis. We thought about suing etc and probably would have a good case but on top of the diagnosis etc too much stress.

Sometimes in life things are sent to us at the right time, there will always be people who are cleverer who get more etc, but if you can debt free in two months and have some saved and most importantly put a line under a terribly stressful and emotional 7 years then I would accept. Then you can sigh a huge sigh of releif and move on with your life.

Take care and enjoy your debt free future and lovely family

Sfx

Gemmadm

Hi sorry to hear of whats happened to you. Is there a chance that if you refused and it went to court, they might throw it out or offer considerably less without an apology. If it was me then I would probably take the money now. This would lessen stress of debts by having paid off all of them and also with all the stress of the last 7 years, you can start to put it all behind you and enjoy your children. This is obviously a hard desision and I hope you make the best one for you. Good luck with everything, whatever you decide to do.
Gemxx

duncans-mum_2

I personally tend to agree with I A. If it is enough to clear your debt, then it will finally be over and you can put a line under it. As you said what you really wanted was an apology, then any extra money they offer you will not change that. At the end of the day, only you guys know what anguish you have been through, and should settle on what feels right for you, what you feel you deserve.

All the best in making your decision.

QueenB.

I think really it is dowe to you and what it is you are seeking both fiancially and psychologically. Having been through a very traumatic birth and some very badly managed aftercare with my second child i can understand the emotional toll. I think i would want an apology but then if i had the oppertunity to take a payment to clear all my debts and make my life free from the stress that causes i might settle for that.

Do what feels right for you. Good luck.

saffronflowers

Forget the aplogy, oh how I would love to have one from the consultant who told me that he was 99.9% sure there was nothing wrong with my daughter and then called social services on me for suspected Munchhausen by Proxy!!! Strange after her diagnosis he went on Gardening leave.

It is hard but leave it behind, draw a line under it and look forward with a smile.

SFx

danno_4

Hi weller,sorry to hear the problems you have had,my comments would be to see what the solicitor says.because he is your legal advisor and should no if what they are offering is right.that is what he gets paid for.i do now that if you go to court after refusing there offer and the judge feels that you have been unreasonable then he could make a lesser offer which could mean that from the date the offer was made you could be resposable for the costs acured from that date.may i also ask have they made an interm payment in to court?hope you don.t think that i am sitting on the fence but i don't think that anyone can really give you any constructed advice.
good luck

danno