Preparedness for when

jk0

Softstuff wrote: »

That's not the experience we've had with them, the ones we've taken out are also independently underwritten, so in the event of the funeral directors going bust, you'll still be ok. That said though, aside from a slightly better coffin, the prepaid funerals we've had (we've had 3 prepaid, 2 we've "used"), have been the very basic ones, aside from a slightly better coffin. Obviously YMMV.

Thanks. I'd be interested to know how long those prepaid funerals had been run for, and whether your family thought that they were up to the standard that had been promised when they were taken out.

Regarding underwriting... hmm. My Comet washing machine extended warranty was underwritten by... you guessed it, AIG.

Karmacat

BigMummaF wrote: »

I know it sounds silly, but I've been fortunate to have been spared the emotional trauma of watching a loved one slowly evaporate over many years.

Has anyone done the pre-paid funeral thing? I'm considering it so The Offspring don't have to worry about the cost, more than anything. I have nothing else to bestow so I don't want to leave an horrendous bill either, if I can help it

I didn't realise pre-paid plans were still available - I've got records of them from family death certificates in the 1930s and 1950s, but thats all.

Two of my recent experiences with the financial part of funerals in the last few years have been very different from one another:
- my dad, we went for a standard local funeral director. They're very well regarded locally, but they lost the CD we gave them to play, there were 3 mistakes in the short Order of Service we gave them, it wasn't good.
- my business partner's mother, he bought an eco coffin - it was woven bamboo, lined with cotton so you couldn't see inside :eek: we carried it into the cemetery chapel ourselves, and he ran the service /commital himself, no-one else involved in that at all.
- a friend who died a few years after that was interred in a natural burial ground, a woodland burial site (the trees are all very young, of course, but it *will* be a forest soon). Actually, I don't know the finances of that, but I imagine the setup costs are still being amortised, so quite high.

My mum, who's quite elderly, has already "gifted" some of her savings to me - just a name change, they're staying where they are. They're intended to cover her funeral expenses, and in the meantime, if she's desperate for money I can "gift" them back to her. The funeral expenses could then be taken from the sale of her house, including any interest payments. To me, its a lot better alternative than paying a funeral director. We did it when she reached 80, and she's healthy still - her mother was 93 when she died, so my mum may be a centenarian :T

Softstuff

jk0 wrote: »

Thanks. I'd be interested to know how long those prepaid funerals had been run for, and whether your family thought that they were up to the standard that had been promised when they were taken out.

Regarding underwriting... hmm. My Comet washing machine extended warranty was underwritten by... you guessed it, AIG.

Well, the three prepaid funerals my family have had all were taken out through a local undertakers but it's a national company that does the actual prepaid plan

The first prepaid was taken out about 25 years ago, the funeral itself took place about 14 years ago. The second prepaid was taken out about 14/15 years ago, and the funeral took place 2012. The final prepaid was only taken out last year and hasn't been used. In all cases as I said, it was the basic plan with a slightly better coffin. So what you're paying for is them to collect the body, prepare it, have viewings, the hearse, 1 additional car, the service at the crematorium (with our choice of minister), the cremation and a basic urn.

As for how it went, I'd say as well if not better than the funerals we organised for other people that weren't prepaid. There was almost a sense with the funeral directors of "it's all prepaid *phew* this is easy". I will mention though as a caveat, that we've organised and help to organise so many funerals with this firm that they know us on sight (we had a bit of a rough run at one stage), so I don't know if we're treated better than someone who walks in for their first time dealing with them.

It's like anything else though, you always have to weigh up the risks of any financial decision for yourself and your own circumstances.

BigMummaF

Let's hope both your mother & mine will get their royal 'telegram' Karma You have to 'order' the card well in advance, plus it ain't cheap; my great-aunt was lucky enough to reach the century & some cousins organised it for her. It was a birthday-type card with a photo of 'er Maj, wearing a twin set & pearls think twas... & a rubber stamped signature on the inside. Somehow I thought it would be a bit more than that, but it shows how someone's personal experience of anything is always handy to know

After Dad passed, we organised an Enduring Power of Attorney with Mum that was supposed to cover any eventualities. Now we are beginning to enter the realms of actually needing the blessed thing, TPTB have gone & changed the ruddy rules :mad: The bit we have got is still legal up to a point, but we can't get it upgraded because of 'reasonable doubt to the mental cognition capabilities', meaning Mum is not capable of making an informed decision because she is being investigated for memory impairment.
Considering the new paperwork is to give my sister & I the say so on what medical intervention to allow the medics to put Mum through, it all seems a bit
And she can't sign a Living Will either

Mojisola

BigMummaF wrote: »

I'm pretty certain that the family is still responsible for funeral costs

If the deceased left anything, the funeral costs are the first bill to be paid but no-one else can be made to pay for someone's funeral.

GreyQueen

One thing we have a problem with at work (I work for a local authority which owns its housing stock, hasn't hived it off to a housing association) is when people who die in sole occupation of their council home without a Will.

A power of attorney ceases when that person dies, so the attorney or next-of-kin if there wasn't a POA, cannot legally end a council tenancy.

An executor can serve the 4 weeks' notice required but if there is no Will, the housing department has to serve notice, the tenancy runs until the notice period expires, and the rent piles up. And, as many people in later life are on low incomes and in receipt of housing benefit, that ends on the Sunday after the person passes away, but the rent keeps getting added until the notice period is over.

OK, the rent which is owed is owed from the estate, not a debt inherited by the next-of-kin, but in the days and even a few weeks after someone dies, the housing department is often struggling to find out what the next-of-kin is intending to do (or even who they are, in some cases) and if there is a Will.

I regularly engage with this muddle in the course of my work, even when the deceased was 80+ and hadn't got around to having a Will because they didn't think they were going to die according to their children.......... it is a terrible mess for the bereaved to sort out and you really feel for them.

There is also the issue that if you have a spouse, to whom you are still married even though you may have been long-separated, they are legally your next-of-kin. And can get stuck with certain kinds of bills; I have come across cases where the bills they were being chased for were the funeral costs of their estranged spouse, who they'd not seen for 20-odd years and didn't even know had died. When there was no current partner or offspring, funearal directors have tried it on with estranged-but-still-married spouses.

If anyone has to register a death, please take advantage of something called Tell Us Once, which is when the registrar will send the information to all state agencies, local government etc.

And get a ruddy Will, even if you think you have diddly-squat, it makes life so much easier.

Mojisola

GreyQueen wrote: »

There is also the issue that if you have a spouse, to whom you are still married even though you may have been long-separated, they are legally your next-of-kin. And can get stuck with certain kinds of bills; I have come across cases where the bills they were being chased for were the funeral costs of their estranged spouse, who they'd not seen for 20-odd years and didn't even know had died.

When there was no current partner or offspring, funearal directors have tried it on with estranged-but-still-married spouses.

The NOK (or anyone else) has no obligation to pay the deceased's debts or for the funeral.

The person who pays for the funeral is the person who arranges it and signs the contract with the funeral director. No-one else should be asked to pay.

GreyQueen

Mojisola wrote: »

The NOK (or anyone else) has no obligation to pay the deceased's debts or for the funeral.

The person who pays for the funeral is the person who arranges it and signs the contract with the funeral director. No-one else should be asked to pay.

Was is allowed and what gets tried on are not necessarily the same. Businesses aren't always honest.

I saw the paperwork for the example I gave IRL. We (I was with the CAB) advised the recipient not to acknowledge the correspondence or make any payments as it wasn't legally their debt. But a funeral director definately tried it on.

Helluva way to find out your estranged spouse was dead, too.

Mind you, I have also encountered next-of-kin who are executors who have baulked at paying the deceased's legitimate debts out of the estate because it would cut down on the amount they'd inherit.

Mojisola

GreyQueen wrote: »

Was is allowed and what gets tried on are not necessarily the same. Businesses aren't always honest.

I saw the paperwork for the example I gave IRL. We (I was with the CAB) advised the recipient not to acknowledge the correspondence or make any payments as it wasn't legally their debt. But the funeral director definately tried it on.

Helluva way to find out your estranged spouse was dead, too.:(

There will always be people and companies that try it on - that doesn't change the truth - as you advised your client, there is no responsibility to pay.

Estranged spouses are still entitled to inherit if their spouse hasn't made a will saying otherwise so it's important to sort that out if a couple separate but don't divorce.

Karmacat

BigMummaF wrote: »

Let's hope both your mother & mine will get their royal 'telegram' Karma You have to 'order' the card well in advance, plus it ain't cheap; my great-aunt was lucky enough to reach the century & some cousins organised it for her. It was a birthday-type card with a photo of 'er Maj, wearing a twin set & pearls think twas... & a rubber stamped signature on the inside. Somehow I thought it would be a bit more than that, but it shows how someone's personal experience of anything is always handy to know

Absolutely and yes, I thought they'd have been personally signed!

After Dad passed, we organised an Enduring Power of Attorney with Mum that was supposed to cover any eventualities. Now we are beginning to enter the realms of actually needing the blessed thing, TPTB have gone & changed the ruddy rules :mad: The bit we have got is still legal up to a point, but we can't get it upgraded because of 'reasonable doubt to the mental cognition capabilities', meaning Mum is not capable of making an informed decision because she is being investigated for memory impairment.
Considering the new paperwork is to give my sister & I the say so on what medical intervention to allow the medics to put Mum through, it all seems a bit
And she can't sign a Living Will either

That sounds really difficult for you I remember when my dad's Power of Attorney was made out, he wasn't really understanding it, but the solicitor had a lot of common sense, and it all worked out, thank heaven.

I agree about the trying-it-on too, all sorts of people and organisations will do that - whenever my mum *does* go , I shall make sure I'm very up to date with the legislation of the time.

One of the prep-related things I wonder about, in relation to that, is when a panic will start in about house prices for houses that are near sea-level. Not that the houses would be any less safe, but just like a flat having a short lease being difficult to sell, a house within 5' of sea level might be difficult to sell in 10 - 20 years time? What do people think?