SOA - please can you take a look and give me some advice please!

nicnicj

@Life's Grand Plan - we have 2 children so it's child benefit paid monthly.. think everyone is entitled to that currently?! They were talking about changing the rules for qualifying but not sure that's gone ahead yet or not?!

nicnicj

tbh the child benefit is what we use to pay for the children's clubs etc...

Lifes_Grand_Plan

Ah of course, stupid me..... I was thinking CB was £20 a month but its per week... and of course you have two little ones = £135...

Thanks and good luck with your plan

meer53

I agree with the other posters in that i don't think anything has hit home with you yet.

It is really difficult to adjust to having less to spend each month, been there done that.

But, what you must do, is to take on board the comments made about the figures you have quoted for groceries and holidays, disregard the ones who preach, take note of the fact that practically everyone has said the same thing. If you're not prepared to compromise on your annual holiday then you have to cut back everywhere else.

Most people who work and have children (includes me !) would like a holiday every year, but unfortunately, even though they too work hard, it's just not possible. You are really lucky that at the moment you can put aside £200 per month for this, but is it really a necessity ? 2 weeks off work, at home with your family is just as much of a holiday as spending £2500 on a trip abroad.

Your comments about not wanting to compromise on the holiday and your excuses for shopping at Tesco and not Aldi or Lidl for example, just show that you're not fully accepting the problems you have.

You also say that you both have careers that are secure. What happens if either of you suffers a serious illness which prevents you from working ? I have a friend with a fantastic career, she has just had to give up work at 38 as she is now too ill with MS to continue. It could happen to anyone.

You seem quite happy to "live for today" and sod the consequences for now. It would only take a rise in mortgage interest rates for you to change your mind, why not do it now and not have to worry if it happens ?

chesky369

I made the point earlier in the thread that it will be the interest-only mortgage that could well be your undoing in the end. That was taken to mean that you should pay it off now which was not what I had in mind (even if you could, which of course, you can't). No, don't pay it off but you have got to, at some point, start saving sufficient for you to do so when it's required. And it's no good mentioning the endowment of £60k, when in another post you say you're prepared to cash it in.

nicnicj

tbh I've had enough advice now from people that have actually made sense and have a plan in place, so I'm signing off for now. Might be back at some point in the future but currently I'm finding quite a few of you quite hostile.
But thanks to those that have tried to help! good luck to you all x

Tabatha_Kitten

Hope you manage to work things out Nic. Dont take some of the comments to personally. At the end of the day the only person you need to justify yourself to is you. Start with a few small steps at a time and things will get better I promise. Good luck.

slowlyfading

Not hostile, just saying it how it is, which is an entirely different matter. I agree with others, don't think you've had your LBM yet, but good luck with your journey anyway

nic_santorini

Can you post your food and sundries bill!! Blooming hector!! wow wee. Hope you have found most of the posts here helpful - probably apart from mine - I have just cut back so much that to spend £200 per week in Tescos I would be in shopping heaven - prob down the champagne aisle. Hope you get yourself sorted. 4 years and counting - all the best

FBaby

To be honest OP, most people struggle to understand what life is for people who earn a nice income and take it for granted (in that you studied hard, put everything into getting the jobs, promotions etc... and that you therefore always expected to earn a pleasant income. Inevitably, you aspire to more than the 'average' family. A nice holiday is the norm, so is spending on food without too much thinking. There is nothing wrong with this at all and you shouldn't feel insulted because people imply that you want a life of luxury.

The thing is, you earn enough to enjoy all those things you seem to be aspiring too. That's not the problem. What is is that at some point in your life, you got over complacent and allow the debts to escalate dangerously so you are now in the position to have no choice but to change your lifestyle for a short time to sort this out. It's nothing to panic about. Your jobs are stable, you have much flexibility to adjust your budget to pay it off. The great thing is that when you will have repaid it all, you will have learnt new good habits and realise how much you were wasting before.

I am much better off now than I was some years back, yet somehow, I am much more careful with money, just because I am starting to experience the satisfaction of being able to put money aside every month by only making a few changes that don't make me feel hard done by.

Good luck with getting your plan into action and sorting this out once and for good.