Am I spending enough!

stphnstevey

I was brought up with 3 brothers, my parents didn't earn very much and I was constantly the poor kid in school. I would often try and hide away, embaressed when in my mothers old banger and when we went to jumble sales/bootsales to buy clothes.

With student loans and grants, I put myself through University and now, after 10yrs hard work, have a good job and salary. I earn around 70K, rent out a couple of houses as well as paying mortgage on one we live in, have substantial amounts in ISA's and pensions.

Apologies for those that don't have money at the moment, I have been there and do very much understand. But I am not ashamed of now having money, I have worked extremely hard for it and if I can do it, anybody else can do the same. I do however apologize if in this thread it talks about spending alot of money on something that you might not be able to afford. However, this is pretty much what this thread will most likely be about, so all I can suggest is you stop reading now if you will be offended

My parents taught me the value of money, but not what to do with it when you have some! I have lived frugally my whole life and when I started to get a good salary, I did what I had been doing all my life, scrimp and save and put it away in savings.

So now I have got to the point where I simply just don't know how much I should be spending and how much I should be saving?

For instance, I love cars. But I would find it hard to spend 30k on my dream car. I could afford it, but I just couldn't imagine that. I currently drive a small, mid range car from a not so well liked car manafacturer. I buy it new and give it to my wife after 3yrs and buy another one. My wife earns around 12k and would like a Mini - but should I buy it for her when I haven't even spent this on myself?

Holidays we have started on. Travel is important, I want to see the world why we can and spent 3k the other year on the best holiday we have ever been on. But that was the first time ever spent so much!

What I am really trying to get at is that now I have a bit of spare cash, it feels a little un-natural to be spending it and in truth I feel a little scared.

Also I don't really know what I want to spend money on-I've spent so long scrimping, that I've never really had a time when I have had spare cash

I can't speak to my parents about this as they are still at the same level of income as when they brought me up and I feel awful speaking about what to spend spare cash on when they don't have the same. I have freinds that are the opposite spend, spend, spend and I often feel I have to 'keep up with the Joneses', but then I often can't see the value for money (eg expensive cars, concerts, clothes-when you can get just as functional items for alot less!)

Just wondered how other people make that 'spending' decision in their heads and whether I can learn anything from that

Thanks

opinions4u

You're in a great place.

Buy the car as a one-off treat. It will last you years. And the mini - she's worth it. Book a cruise.

Then get back to earning more than you spend.

Oh, and make sure pensions are covered for both of you.

Homeagain

What an interesting and thought provoking thread! Well I am not sure how I can help you except by suggesting 'baby steps'. Take a good holiday, enjoy, but continue to be careful - nothing wrong with that but I don't know if I could personally justify a really expensive car although you say you love cars. Strangely enough my story is a complete reversal of yours. I was widowed very young and when my husband was alive we certainly lived the good life, cars, 'planes, endless holidays and no shortage of money. However when he died (in a car wreck) it turned out that he had a lot of debt etc and things were clearly not what I thought they were. Never mind though, the loss of my husband was far greater than all that. Now I am Miss frugal itself and I don't know if I really miss the 'good life' all that much. My daughter was only 18 months when he died and I think she looks at photos and longs for those experiences. Sad really. Oh well I can only say that one never knows what life is going to turn up tomorrow and I am sure that your careful lifestyle will be hard to change, (which in my opinion and speaking from experience is no bad thing) so don't change it too much just try to be happy. Best of luck.

Dunedin

I think you raise some interesting points. I'm quite similar, coming from a household growing up where every penny was saved and the value of money understood.

I think the important thing is that you spend money on what matters to you. You don't mention if you have children, but I think having dependants will (or should) automatically make people save any excess money for future costs (education, helping with property etc.). However, if you have already made provisions for this there should really be no 'rules' for how to spend your money, other to enjoy yourself!

In my personal case, I completely agree that I find the thought of buying a new £30k car ridiculous even if I could afford it- I would much rather buy an ex-lease 6 month old "bargain"! However, having extra money has made me buy better food, holidays and the occasional tech gadget- these are the things that bring me pleasure.

Overall- have fun and certainly don't worry that you're not spending enough if you are content with life! As you have suggested, that's an incredibly lucky place to be!

sorcerer

I think striking a balance between spending and saving is very important, you don't want to go through life thinking about the things you could have done when you actually had the money. But it's also sensiable to save for your later years.

iluvsaving

I completely agree with OP. I understand where you come from and since working I find it hard to spend any money treating myself as I think "I could have saved that money." I am not saving up for anything I just want a lot of money and have a similar background. This thread should provoke some interesting posts.

darkvader

Refreshing thread and kudos to you for doing so well. Contrary to what you may know, there are many people in the same boat - parents not earning a lot but living a decent life and teaching sons and daughters how best to save for the future

The missus and I have experienced the same - still remember investing 50% of my first pay cheque in a fund that, eventually, multiplied 3 times over. Their advice helped us pay for our wedding without borrowing a penny or for that matter, never having a single penny owing credit card companies....Ok, thats my tribute to the folks

Coming to the spending. As long as you have your bases covered, I dont see the reason to feel any guilt spending your money on luxuries. Since you are well off, try and keep atleast a year's savings accessible - you are able to so why not? Maybe 18months if you can - who knows, you could take 6 months out of your careers and go globe trotting - no one can predict what the mind wants to do
Then, make sure you are investing as much as you can to secure your old age and address needs for you kids. Once done, enjoy the spare moolah

I want to give one suggestion - whatever the spare cash, after you have put aside enough for savings/retirement/rain day, move this into an account meant for spending. Stick to a monthly 'this is my pampering money' and try to save on this too. A 50% saving on that fab holiday this year can do wonders for the next fab holiday 5 years later. So use this entire bucket for shopping, holidays and cars. Be judicious on utilising this spare bucket because saving here for future luxuries will make you feel even better - you are not only splurging but ensuring you do so keeping in mind how the cash can give you more in the future

Best wishes for a wonderful life
DV

jinkster

People that have worked hard should be rewarded. Keep money on one side and reward yourself with others.

caeler

Very interesting. I hate spending money, I have worked so hard to have a disposable income and now I won't spend it! I have people try to convince me I deserve a treat, etc and it takes me ages to come to terms with spending money. This is weird I think. I did wonder if I was one of those awful tight people but my mum assures me I am very generous with my friends and family so that is good to know!!

I think it is better to have a cautious attitude to money rather than a no control one. Having had both in my time, I'm sticking with caution! But I do like darkvader's suggestion about having a pot which is for spending and that you should try hard to spend it (after all the bases are covered). I am going to try this!

jonesMUFCforever

I completely agree with OP but often on here I get my head bitten off for saying the same thing!

dawyldthing

I'm kind of in a similar boat in that i am stable money wise, theres money saved for the mortgage and I like my holidays. I make sure i've got a years buffer just incase the job turns sour so I can cover all my outgoings without worrying too much. Then the rest I put half the outgoings that I have in one account so that every 2 months another month buffer is there and the rest is saved towards general savings and house repairs.

I always think you might as well enjoy it now as someone else will enjoy it when I have gone if I don't spend it