Children's savings

moonlightpjs

tara747 wrote: »

If you can pay back the money to their savings accounts, then I guess it's your call.

My tuppence worth on the other points:

Spending tax credits/child benefit (mostly on the family anyway) - OK

Taking from children's birthday money - not OK

Being in debt through bum deal in life - I have sympathy

Being in debt because of not being able to control spending on consumer tat, holidays etc - no sympathy

Intending to pay off your own debts - good for you

Not intending to pay off your own debts - hanging's too good for you

Not cutting up cards now - why??

Best to cut up the cards...

Forgive me for butting in but first of all the OP was not intending to "take" her childrens savings - just borrow them with every intention of paying them back. She was just asking advice - we all do that every day!!!!

Secondly, we are all on this board to get advice, support and the help we need to get out of debt, whether we have not being able to control spending or having a bum deal - I myself, am guilty of both. We do not judge - we just help each other in whatever way we can.

Thirdly, we take the best route for us whether that is BR, an IVA, a DMP or just do it ourselves - people who declare BR or enter into an IVA because they cannot pay their debts do so as there is no other way forward, they do not deserve the comment hanging is too good for you. It is not a decision they take lightly at all.

Bambywamby

Confession time...I've eaten my son's easter eggs before without him knowing...I didn't feel guilty though, he is the first one to say "Youre looking a bit chubby mother".

Bambywamby

Hmmm indeed hanging is only too good for murderers, paedophiles and people who are cruel to animals and children.

mags24

tigzem wrote: »

I've borrowed my daughter's savings account in the past, and I felt guilty ....
QUOTE]

Arrggghhhh. What's with the guilt? You are a parent, its your job to make tough decisions. They may not be right, but if you make the best decision that you can, with the information you have, YOU HAVE NOTHING TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT!

Use it as motivation to make all your lives better, by all means, but don't waste your time on guilt. Its an empty, pointless, paralysing emotion. Make your choice & move on. The sooner you do, the sooner you can replace the money, and improve the standard of living for yourself and your daughter.

She won't thank you in later years for wringing your hands over should you/shouldn't you. She will be inspired by you being decisive, meeting problems head on, setting in place a plan to tackle problems and seeing it through. Wow, what a role model!

moonlightpjs

Bambywamby wrote: »

Confession time...I've eaten my son's easter eggs before without him knowing...I didn't feel guilty though, he is the first one to say "Youre looking a bit chubby mother".

I confess too - I eat them every year - well, he doesn't eat them and its a shame if they went to waste :rolleyes: Probably explains why I am so overweight but I just can't let good chocolate go in the bin - it would be a sin:o

mags24

weller711 wrote: »

I confess too - I eat them every year - well, he doesn't eat them and its a shame if they went to waste :rolleyes: Probably explains why I am so overweight but I just can't let good chocolate go in the bin - it would be a sin:o

Lol! Definitely!

lynsayjane

ok i'm going to look at this from a different angle, I'm my mothers child (duh!) and if it were my money I'd tell her to take every last penny and not take it back, exactly the same as she'd do to me if the situation were reversed. Over the years she has helped me tremendously and even now although she's on a dmp when I told her I had two mortgage payments to make she merely told me to tell her how much I need and she'll get it for me. I'd do exactly the same for her. At one point a few months ago my stepdad walked out and she simply couldn't afford to live by herself, I was more than willing to put off getting debt free to help her. In the end he came back so it was not an issue.

What I'm trying to say is I'd do anything to help my mum out and I'm sure if your kids were old enough to understand they'd feel the same.

SunderlandBlackCat

mrsspendalot wrote: »

Well we were going to chop the cards straight away ... but we thought we would get more satisfaction from cutting them up one by one as they are cleared ... another one bites the dust kind of thing. So we sealed them away in an envelope so we would see if each other had weakened and opened the envelope. However, that was before I came on here and got some motivation. Perhaps now is the right time to give them the snip afterall.

Do whatever works best for you.

All my cards have remained intact until the moment I've ended the phoone call or posted the letter to cancel them. If you're happy that you aren't going to spend on them then theres no problem in keeping them in an envelope.

I keep mine frozen in a block of ice in the freezer (copied from someone else saying they did that on here). You can't defrost them in the microwave as that screws up the cards so you have to wait for the thing to defrost if you want to use them.

That gives plenty of time to think again if you're thinking of using them for something frivolous. If its for something genuine though (like when my engine blew up) they're still there in case of emergency.

tara747

mrsspendalot wrote: »

Well we were going to chop the cards straight away ... but we thought we would get more satisfaction from cutting them up one by one as they are cleared ... another one bites the dust kind of thing. So we sealed them away in an envelope so we would see if each other had weakened and opened the envelope. However, that was before I came on here and got some motivation. Perhaps now is the right time to give them the snip afterall.

Good for you.

"Forgive me for butting in but first of all the OP was not intending to "take" her childrens savings - just borrow them with every intention of paying them back. She was just asking advice - we all do that every day!!!!"

I know, which is why I said that it's her call if she can pay it back. Sometimes you just need to sound out an idea somewhere like here. I think she's making great progress with debt.

*applause*

I stand by my comments about those who get into debt for consumer tat - knowing that they can't pay it back e.g. not earning enough to live a designer lifestyle. I see them every day on TV. And I hope that the rest of us aren't penalised. Someone's going to have to make up the losses on all those IVAs and bankruptcies! The bank's shareholders maybe???

Hmm.

tara747

SunderlandBlackCat wrote: »

Do whatever works best for you.

All my cards have remained intact until the moment I've ended the phoone call or posted the letter to cancel them. If you're happy that you aren't going to spend on them then theres no problem in keeping them in an envelope.

I keep mine frozen in a block of ice in the freezer (copied from someone else saying they did that on here). You can't defrost them in the microwave as that screws up the cards so you have to wait for the thing to defrost if you want to use them.

That gives plenty of time to think again if you're thinking of using them for something frivolous. If its for something genuine though (like when my engine blew up) they're still there in case of emergency.

Great idea...