How to cheer OH up with no cash

katsu

Can you find Jubilee events near you that might be cheap or free? Take the kids to a sing, song, fireworks, beacon lighting?

Agree with setting a monthly ents budget - either as a family or just for OH - maybe give him budget so he can see where to cut to have some cash

Good luck

SpagBol

I totally sympathise, my DH is like this (not depressed as such just feels he "deserves" a treat) and after a few years of living half-a-life and robbing peter to pay paul I called time on it and we are not going to pubs/restaurants/cafes/having takeaways at all this year. It is tough but I want to be able to spend money on my family without guilt and that has to happen in the next few years. It is non-negotiable in this house and DH is still finding it hard.

Have you got cinemas near you that do weekend kids films for £1 a ticket? The Empire and Vue cinemas do it and if you take your own popcorn etc it is £4 for a family of four. Get a voucher for a meal (F&Bs do vouchers and really cheap kids meals) for after if you can get a good deal.

We have a rule of no buying pub meals drinks etc but can socialise at home. We have friends over and go to other people's houses which is enough for me, DH finds turning down after work drinks very hard but loves having friends over.

Do you have a city farm near you, these are often free or reasonable and great for kids.

Museums are a great place to go. Again I haven't been to the one in Manchester but the Imperial War museum in London is fantastic.

Have you checked for free fairs and things this weekend?

Good luck!

sistafromanothermista

RexBanner wrote: »

Stockings, suspenders (on you, not him - although we're not here to judge:D) and a bottle of wine do the trick for me. Bottle of wine is optional as well, so there's another fiver saved...

:rotfl: This made me lol :rotfl:

determined_new_ms

sistafromanothermista wrote: »

:rotfl: This made me lol :rotfl:

me too! :rotfl:

elly-spendaholic

lol to the suspender post! Thanks for the advice guys..we don't have friends as OH has pushed everyone away (which doesn't help when we are trying to entertain ourselves!) I'm hoping the weather gets better so we can go for a walk on a beach and take a picnic. OH mood isn't great at the moment so am gonna do my best to cheer him up! x

Mrs_Arcanum

elly-spendaholic wrote: »

lol to the suspender post! Thanks for the advice guys..we don't have friends as OH has pushed everyone away (which doesn't help when we are trying to entertain ourselves!) I'm hoping the weather gets better so we can go for a walk on a beach and take a picnic. OH mood isn't great at the moment so am gonna do my best to cheer him up! x

Does he have a camera already? DH spends hours walking taking pictures of various native wild life. Yes, like your OH he would love to spend money on camera equipment but as we do not have spare cash he has to go without.

Are there any free jubilee events on? Locally we have a free concert of local bands and a beer festival (with Wychwood beer at £5 entry including a commemorative glass & pint).

Sometimes getting them out of the house without the family may be what they need. The combined pressure of entertaining children and having no money can be seen as a barrier, which then gets nothing whatsoever done except increase the depression.

Barbeduk

Dear me he needs to grow up and stop behaving like the world owes him. He's let his kids down by getting into arrears with the CSA and he's pushed all your friends away. You might get through this weekend but what about the next, and the next, and the school holidays.

If he's depressed he needs to man up and get himself to the gp to sort out some treatment. If he's not depressed he needs to start acting like a decent human being, husband and father. He's resentful that you're the main breadwinner? Maybe thankful he's got someone looking out for him would be a better way to see things.

Sorry to be the only person to criticise him, but really, why should you have to go to all this effort to appease a grown man?

chickywiggle

hope you find something to do. My hubby is exactly the same.
Except whereas I will want to go out and do something (cheap) tomorrow when we are both off he'd rather sulk around the house.

Thanks for the heads up on the IWM in Manchester have earmarked it for a day out with my boys in the future.

If it's sunny we had a fantastic time in Heaton Park the other weekend. Walk around, train ride, ice creams and a picnic. (but my boys are young enough to think a tram ride is a day out so we're pretty lucky in that respect).

January20

Barbeduk wrote: »

Dear me he needs to grow up and stop behaving like the world owes him. He's let his kids down by getting into arrears with the CSA and he's pushed all your friends away. You might get through this weekend but what about the next, and the next, and the school holidays.

If he's depressed he needs to man up and get himself to the gp to sort out some treatment. If he's not depressed he needs to start acting like a decent human being, husband and father. He's resentful that you're the main breadwinner? Maybe thankful he's got someone looking out for him would be a better way to see things.

Sorry to be the only person to criticise him, but really, why should you have to go to all this effort to appease a grown man?

I agree with this post. I think OP you have to be careful not to be an enabler in this bad behaviour by making excuses because you think he might be depressed.