What would you do?

bubbles0169

I wouldn't book it if i was out of work, even if my oh was working, id be worrying for the whole 18 months, do you have extra money aside for peoples birthdays inc your sons friends? Does he have more trips planned or will they spring up? Do u have extra cash for car or white goods repairs? What about house maintenance?

Jacqu79

JimmyTheWig wrote: »

If your budget is realistic then you've got £100 a month spare once you've paid for this trip to cover anything that "will come up".


I guess the other question is what is your alternative?
It actually sounds to me like you are doing things quite cheaply. It's costing you half what we spent on ours 7 years ago, and we did everything on the cheap (e.g. our wedding breakfast for everyone was take-away pizza). Though I guess we had over twice the number of guests.

It strikes me that you've planned a wonderful wedding for £5k.
Now try to plan one for, say, £3k. Can you do it? What, that would be important to the two of you, would you have to drop to cut back to that money?
Until you know what you're getting for your money, it's hard to decide whether the saving (and risking not having enough for the things that might come up) is worth it.

So your choices are (a) make the necessary sacrifices (potentially none, if nothing comes up) over the coming months to save up £5k, (b) make the necessary sacrifices to your wedding plans to reduce the budget to, say, £3k or (c) make the personal sacrifice of waiting longer and put the wedding back a year.

I'd go for (a), but it's not my decission?
You'd go for (a), too, by the sounds of it.
What would your OH go for?

It would be a great wedding! It normally costs much more to get married there, but they're doing an all inclusive midweek special and were offering us a good deal for next year. I would deffo go for (a) OH would probably go for (c). We're going for another look on Saturday, then we'll decide one way or another. The other option is to get married in a registry office, then have a meal somewhere with just close family. I was happy about that before, but now I have my heart set on this place.

I love the idea of take away pizza! I'd suggested hiring a fish and chip van for our guests, then they could all pick what they liked!

Jacqu79

trying_2_b_good wrote: »

Hi Jacqu79

Something could always come up - if you're OH is always going to worry about this, then you won't book a date until you have the full amount saved! But by then you'll have to wait another x amount of months before you can get married. And then, what if the boiler breaks/roof needs repairing...!

If it were me, I do as you are and book. But before you do, perhaps have the conversation with your Dad so you know exactly how much he is contributing (if you don't already know). Also make sure your budget includes registrar fees etc.

There are a whole host of ways to make a bit extra cash - both of you can switch bank accounts to one with a bonus, as you said ebay etc.

My hubby & I saved a fortune onve we'd booked the date. Haven't saved a penny since - it's amazing how quickly you fall back into bad habbits - but as you said, we found it easier to pay things off than to just save.

Good luck!

That's the thing that worries me! If we don't book something soon, there will always be something else to worry about!

I need to sit down and do a super indepth budget and try and get him to see that we can afford it!

Thank you:)

Jacqu79

rrf494g wrote: »

It's of course, your joint decision but

bear in mind that there is a whole industry out there determined to get you to spend enormous amounts of money and "fall in love" with things that "you must have" in order to make your day special.

Work out what really makes your day special for you two. Only spend on that. I've been to several weddings where i've gone away thinking that the couple had been swollowed by "the industry", and the marriage itself has been in a back seat compared to the consumption of services. The BIG memory from most weddings I've been to, has not been anything that could have been bought, but rather something that came from time, attention and care from the people involved.

good luck

I know, and it would be so easy to get carried away with the whole thing! That's why this package we've been offered is ideal! We both have quite large families, so we can have them all there, at least in the evening. I really havent seen anything else that offers as much as this package does. everything else will be done as cheap as possible too.:)

Jacqu79

trying_2_b_good wrote: »

Oh yeah - meant to say that package sounds fantastic value!

It's an amazing price! It's usually a good bit more expensive. It's a hotel that used to be a castle, and it's set in beautiful gardens with a tree lined sweeping driveway up to the main entrance. I had butterflies when we drove up and the house came into view! The venue has as much to offer as some of the more pricier places I've looked at, if not more, but I think the reason it's so much cheaper is that it is surrounded by houses now. It's not a big deal, as you can't see them from the house or the gardens, just on the approach to the drive way.

The package is for midweek weddings, but includes Fridays, so I was planning on going for Friday 23 august, as the Monday is a bank holiday.

I think I'm going to become a bridezilla over this place!:eek::rotfl:

Jacqu79

bubbles0169 wrote: »

I wouldn't book it if i was out of work, even if my oh was working, id be worrying for the whole 18 months, do you have extra money aside for peoples birthdays inc your sons friends? Does he have more trips planned or will they spring up? Do u have extra cash for car or white goods repairs? What about house maintenance?

The trip is a one off, thank goodness, so we won't have to think about anything like that coming up. I budget money each month for birthdays and emergencies, so that shouldn't be a problem thankfully!

PinkPrincess83

I would do a detailed list of everything you need and a rough estimate of the costs, I would then look at my monthly outgoings and be sure I would have enough to cover emergencies (car faults, house/ electrical item faults, etc) and work out how much realistically could be saved and would then decide if it is an achievable goal.

I know its hard but when you do this (budgeting etc) dont let your heart rule your head, if you cant save enough money then I personally wouldnt risk it (this is based on reading about brides in a panic because the wedding is say weeks away and there isnt enough pennies in the pot).

We didnt have the savings before we booked our wedding, but we had a realistic detailed budget and set up a small standing order each into a savings account specifically set up for the wedding. We seem on track (although the actual amount being spent on the wedding has been increased it is because of lovely people contributing).

sugarwalsh

Just out of interest - have you checked that date is ok to get your deal on? I would be amazed that somewhere which is as lovely as it sounds is offering such a good deal on a bank holiday weekend. I was brought up in a tourist area and over bank holidays people have to book for a minimum of 3 nights! If they are offering it I would really question why. Not to put a dampner, but it just sounds too good to be true!

Can your OH not get work doing something else? It is 19 months away, surely he can pick up some work between now and then? Even if it is in a pub at night?

We had no savings when we booked as there is always 'something else'. We have just paid for ours - in 9 days time! - and I was surprised at how painless it was to get the money. That said, we did book when we knew OH was gong to be in work for at least 6 months as he is self employed too.

Normally I would say 'go for it' but something isn't quite adding up for me, so I'm saying 'be wary' and make sure you aren't swept up with the whole sales thing.

Jacqu79

PinkPrincess83 wrote: »

I would do a detailed list of everything you need and a rough estimate of the costs, I would then look at my monthly outgoings and be sure I would have enough to cover emergencies (car faults, house/ electrical item faults, etc) and work out how much realistically could be saved and would then decide if it is an achievable goal.

I know its hard but when you do this (budgeting etc) dont let your heart rule your head, if you cant save enough money then I personally wouldnt risk it (this is based on reading about brides in a panic because the wedding is say weeks away and there isnt enough pennies in the pot).

We didnt have the savings before we booked our wedding, but we had a realistic detailed budget and set up a small standing order each into a savings account specifically set up for the wedding. We seem on track (although the actual amount being spent on the wedding has been increased it is because of lovely people contributing).

I've done all the budgeting and there's enough left over each month to cover everything and not leave us skint, plus if my OH has work, then its a bonus!:) it's just the fear of the unexpected happening I think.:(

PinkPrincess83

Well I think if you are happy you can afford it, and your oh is happy with your budget plan you should go for it!:D