different weddings in different countries

PolishBigSpender

Inspired by another thread about food at the wedding, I'm starting this one about cultural differences.

I'm always surprised when I'm reading about "day" and "evening" guests, paying for your own drinks or no food at the wedding. On the other hand, our British guests were shocked by the amount of food and drink available at our wedding, they actually thought we were joking about having free drinks for everyone!

At our wedding there was:
- soup
- meat (6 kinds to choose from, but one could have more then one kind) plus fish with potatoes/chips/rice/"kluski" http://pozytywnakuchnia.pl/files/2011/02/kluski-slaskie-biale.jpg
- salads
- ice cream with fruit and cream
- cold meats, eggs etc., salads, fruit, bread, cake available the whole time
- our main cake
- at 10pm there was also grill with different kinds of meat, sausages, vegetables etc.
- another hot meal (some kind of meat)
- and finally another soup

Plus tea, coffee, juice, water, coke, beer, vodka and wine - unlimited amount. Vodka, wine, juice, coke and water were at the tables, replaced by fresh bottles as time went by, Tea and coffee, was delivered by waiters, beer was available at the bar from the tap.

What are other difference you notice between weddings in different countries, or maybe even between regions in the UK?

74jax

I've only ever been to a wedding in the UK, however they have all varied considerably. I don't think there is a 'norm'.

At ours all food and majority of drink is provided. But I think it varies between couples, not regions.

MrsDrink

74jax wrote: »

I don't think there is a 'norm'.

I haven't been to any weddings (well other than my brothers' first wedding but I was so drunk I don't remember much of it - ooops!) but reading these boards there is only one 'norm'. And that is at the end of the day two people have come together legally - either as husband and wife, or same sex partners.

workinginoz

I think the ettiquette of the wedding gift list is funny.
In many parts of the UK people people are fine about putting it on the invite...in others woah, don't dare.

Also the whole day/night thing can be different. I am Irish and the first UK wedding invite I got was in Scotland for the church + evening, which is just not done back home. I didn't go to the wedding bit and really offended the bride apparently. But I wonder what she expected us to do for the 6 hours between her wedding and the evening guests arrival time? She rather offended me by assuming I had time to waste to look at her in a dress from afar!

NoAngel

I went to an Asian wedding and there was no 'day' and 'evening' part. In fact, the whole thing was pretty short, starting at 2pm and having to leave by 6pm as there was another wedding later on! We could sit anywhere (no seating plan). It was soo different to what I am used to - quite chaotic at times, but a really amazing wedding.

74jax

workinginoz wrote: »

I think the ettiquette of the wedding gift list is funny.
In many parts of the UK people people are fine about putting it on the invite...in others woah, don't dare.

Also the whole day/night thing can be different. I am Irish and the first UK wedding invite I got was in Scotland for the church + evening, which is just not done back home. I didn't go to the wedding bit and really offended the bride apparently. But I wonder what she expected us to do for the 6 hours between her wedding and the evening guests arrival time? She rather offended me by assuming I had time to waste to look at her in a dress from afar!

I've never heard of being invited to just the church part and then the evening. I too would wonder what to do in between if I was travelling a distance.

yep, there's defo no 'norm' :rotfl:

VfM4meplse

PolishBigSpender wrote: »

paying for your own drinks or no food at the wedding.

This is just plain mean. If you're going to play host, for heavens sake be hospitable. If you can't afford to treat your guests as guests, then don't invite people to celebrate with you. Invite then to join you on a diet instead.

White_Sapphire

PolishBigSpender wrote: »

I'm always surprised when I'm reading about "day" and "evening" guests, paying for your own drinks or no food at the wedding.

Really???? That is just rude, and certainly not the norm at British weddings! There is no way I would invite people to spend the day with me and not provide anything to eat, much less at my wedding!!

As for drink, it's generally provided after the ceremony, and with the meal, but unless the couple have money to burn it's rare for a free bar to be in place for the whole thing. TBH, I have found, when at an event with a free bar, that people frequently leave a drink half-finished and go and get another one rather than remember which theirs is, because it's not costing them anything. Result; lots of wasted booze!

74jax

White_Sapphire wrote: »

There is no way I would invite people to spend the day with me and not provide anything to eat, much less at my wedding!!

I've been to one all day wedding with no food, but the wedding was short and we went to the pub afterwards and I've been to a couple of night do's with no food too.

White_Sapphire

74jax wrote: »

I've been to one all day wedding with no food, but the wedding was short and we went to the pub afterwards and I've been to a couple of night do's with no food too.

That's fair enough. I was thinking of a wedding from early afternoon through into the evening with nothing provided! :eek:

JBD

Your wedding sounds great PBS.
My wedding was in 1987. We had to get married in the registry office [different laws then] so could only have 35 guests for the actual wedding. We did have an evening reception as well so we could invite all our friends and families.
We had a self catered buffet with plenty of food, also we paid for the bar ourselves [it was in a social club so cheaper prices]. We didn't have champagne for toasts, or wedding cars or lots of flowers or bridesmaids or ushers. It was all quite informal.