Opinions wanted on bullying and leaving job

pineapple

I was in hospital a long time and off for weeks after a burst appendix. While I was still in hospital but sitting up my boss came in with a load of files and begged me for help! He left the files for me to go through. I didn't mind at all. There again - we had a very good relationship.
I'm more concerned about the injury being caused by the boxes. Used to work at a local authority day centre on open, but council owned land. The caretaker was running for a bus one day when his foot went down a hole and he broke an ankle. He got a good pay out!

dandelionclock30

What about asking for a very large payoff and a good reference?
If you want to go for constructive dismissal its very hard to win this , as I think only 3% of claims are sucessfull and I think you have to have exhausted all the grievence procedures first to get a full payout otherwize the amount is reduced.
If you win a grievence and then return to work, what they could do is get you on another issue even a small slip they will say is gross misconduct and will get you sacked on that.
I personally wouldnt settle for 10 weeks money and a reference after being injured. In this climate you may never get anther job, where 10 weeks money going to get you.
I would ask for an amount which will compensate you for your ill health and a good reference.The school are not in a good position with this and they know it. You could start negotiating with them.
Remember the last thing schools want is publicity and if you started proceedings against them they would be mortified.

Harry_Flashman

Lynda212 wrote: »

I din't want to go into too many details about the bullying, which is also separate from the phone calls. However when she had been told her constant ringing is making me ill, she carried on doing so, asking the same questions over and over again and demanding I go online and sort problems for her, even when I pointed out there was a dedicated help line that would be better placed to help her.

She made the decision not to have anyone cover my absence despite the generous insurance money she was getting because she thought it was a good opportunity to make some money for the school, even though there was no-one else qualified to do my job.
As I said I was happy to help for the first few weeks but 6/7 months in, it as just her laziness that kept her contacting me. When I told her I was unplugging my phone line because her call were too much she started texting and emailing with demands to ring her, and I felt threatened in my own home

OK, that is a little beyond the pale.

paidinchickens

gibson123 wrote: »

I think if occupational health and the person asked for it to stop and the perpetrator persisted in doing this against the OP's wishes then this could in fact be regarded as bullying. I have been in a situation of extreme pain and believe me all you can think of is pain, when even small things like opening your post or doing the crossword feel beyond you, the last thing you want to do is also try to think about work. recuperation is just that, if you are not well enough to be at work, work should not come to you instead, we are not talking about a gippy tummy or bad cold, we are talking about significant and sustained hurt resulting in immobility

I have had a slipped disc recently. I spent two weeks laid up in bed and getting to the toilet on my own was the biggest achievement I could muster. I am now nearly four weeks down the line and am a little more mobile but I am still in a lot of pain and I can tell you I would not be sorting anything out from work. A phone call once a week to see if your ok fine but anything else..........booger off!!!

Hubby is off sick from work at the moment due to bullying and stress and he feels unable to take it further so I understand what you are going through. DH is a nervous wreck as she (Mega beast) is like Chinese water torture drip, drip, drip. We are waiting for karma to come and bite her in the !!! at the moment but may have to send her address as I think karma may have got lost

Good luck xx

Elvisia

Are you doing anything about getting compensation for them causing the accident in the first place? I agree with the bullying (do you work in a school by any chance, because I suffered really badly when I worked in education) but I also wonder if you're doing anything about the fact their dodgy health and safety put you there in the first place? I would say though in long run do whatever is right FOR YOU, so if the stress of a big tribunal is too much, don't feel a failure for not going down that route.

getmore4less

A side issue but why did they have your mobile No.

It is a good idea to avoid giving work you personal mobile No.

If you have to give a mobile Number keep a spare PAYG sim/phone that you can give that and just ignore

email is easy to ignore and again have a spare email set up if you will find that difficult.

Anyway back to the case,

Take the school to the cleaners and make sure the goveners and PTA are aware of who they have running the school.

WhiteHorse

Lynda212 wrote: »

Psychiatric professor, private orthopaedic consultant, and consultant at the hospital spinal clinic.

By using the shrink they are trying to get you written off as a nutcase - this is a common trick, and one particularly favoured by public sector employers.

I fail to understand how, if the slipped disc has been confirmed, an orthopaedic consultant and a spinal consultant can say that 'there is nothing wrong, it's all in her head'.

... the union say bullying and harassment is very hard to prove even though they agree she is a bully and out of control.

It can be difficult to prove, that's true, but if someone from both the union and HR witnessed her in action, then they have no excuse.

Unfortunately, a lot of union reps are well meaning but useless when it comes to fighting a serious case. Try going higher in the union and asking for a full time official to deal with it.

... the union have been very good in getting a solicitor regarding the accident, and the local council have admitted liability for it.

This is your weapon. You can drag them through the courts if you choose. And needless to say, that would give you an opportunity to wash a lot of dirty linen in public.

Perhaps I should have mentioned that I work in a school, so there is virtually no chance of them getting rid of the headteacher.

You are right - the educational m.a.f.i.a is just as bad as that which protects bad doctors and solicitors.

I feel like they just want me to go quietly and the head will once again be getting away with it.

Yes.

I would very much like to put up a fight but the union rep thinks if I put in a grievance it will only leave sacking or resigning and I really need a good reference to get another job.

No, the rep is not aggressive enough. You can stay in situ and fight them every inch of the way.

Reprise the facts:

The head teacher is a bully and has crossed the line, legally, and they know it. They have admitted that you have been injured due to her (their), negligence. They want to avoid the scandal that a bullying case would bring. They want rid of you and you want to leave.

So, cut a deal.

You will leave quietly and without filing against them for bullying and harrassment, but they have to admit liability for the injury and pay you off, generously. They will also provide a good reference.

In the short term, the bully will get away with it. In the long term, there is a very good chance that the employer will not thank her for landing them in it, and her cards will be marked accordingly.

Lynda212

paidinchickens wrote: »

I have had a slipped disc recently. I spent two weeks laid up in bed and getting to the toilet on my own was the biggest achievement I could muster. I am now nearly four weeks down the line and am a little more mobile but I am still in a lot of pain and I can tell you I would not be sorting anything out from work. A phone call once a week to see if your ok fine but anything else..........booger off!!!

Hubby is off sick from work at the moment due to bullying and stress and he feels unable to take it further so I understand what you are going through. DH is a nervous wreck as she (Mega beast) is like Chinese water torture drip, drip, drip. We are waiting for karma to come and bite her in the !!! at the moment but may have to send her address as I think karma may have got lost

Good luck xx

Totally, at first, managing to get my socks on was my greatest daily achievement!

I feel for your OH, it's difficult trying to find a balance between making people accountable and doing what's best for you. I feel a bit ridiculous for not telling my boss where to get off when she refused to stop ringing, but you get to the point where it's had such an effect on you, you don't know which way is up and you can't see the situation objectively.
Don't know if karma will be getting her any time soon, but people like that don't just bully one person, it's usually part of their general attitude towards people. Chances are she'll end up doing something to sabotage herself eventually. Or she may have a collision with a bus before she gets the chance...
Hope things improve for you and your OH x

Lynda212

getmore4less - I never thought it would be an issue, it's a fairly common way of communicating in my workplace (because people would rather not have to endure a conversation with her, I imagine), but I will certainly heed your advice in future.

WhiteHorse - I very much appreciate your input, it has helped clarify things in my head and I am feeling a lot stronger now.
I wasn't clear - I was diagnosed with a slipped disc which healed over a few months. However when the doctor later ran some tests to check everything was 'fixed', they became concerned they had missed something as my symptoms were indicative of spinal chord damage. An MRI ruled this out and they said stress was the only other way to account for my symptoms (numbness, lack of balance and coordination, hyper-reflexes etc). They believe the accident and subsequent highly charged emotions placed such pressure on my central nervous system, that it went loopy/into shock.

People have been reluctant to twin the accident claim and problems returning to work. But you are correct I need to be more aggressive/assertive, so I will get in contact with HR and my solicitor tomorrow morning to make my case.

thanku1

Take option 3
grievance I have noticed are never upheld going to tribunal you get no reference.