cystoscopy fear and refusal

ThriftyWanabee

I really don't know where to start with this but need to share as I'm going crazy with worry.

I'm a woman in my early 30's and have had 3 urine infections in the last 9 months (blood in my urine). The first 2 were treated with antibiotics but now I've got a 3rd one the dr wants to send me for tests. I took a urine sample in last week and although there's no visable blood the dip test showed blood was still present.

My gp wanted to refer me for a cystoscopy but I refused...the sheer terror of something invasive is something I cannot even begin to describe. My gp has now referred me for an ultrasound. I'm still waiting for a date but I'm starting to go out of my mind with worry. I'm due to go back to the gp this week for a bp check as they think it's high. The state I'm in just now I'm too terrified to even think about letting someone touch me to check my bp (I know it sounds stupid and I feel pathetic).

With all this worry I have stomach ache, back ache, I feel sick, I'm off my food, I feel dizzy and lightheaded, I'm waking up at 4am and can't get back to sleep, I feel tearful almost all the time, tense and unable to relax. I know this is because of the worry but I also worry some of it may be because something is wrong with me.

I'm dreading going to the dr as I know I'm probably overreacting and am worried if I tell them how I feel they'll think I'm a total idiot.

jfdi

Aw bless Thrifty.

Can you work out why you're working yourself into such a tizz? Is it the Cystoscopy or the fear of the unknown as far as your infection is concerned?

As you're a woman in her 30s I'd assume you've had Smears? Or even gynae exams for babies etc?

If you have done (& I hope you've had your smears if nothing else!) can I just reassure you that the procedure is about 10% of the embarassment of either of them? I was petrified too but it was fine in the end - I even got a guided tour round my bladder from the Docs! Sounds weird but it's quite beautiful!

PM me if you want.

(((hugs)))

Nicki

Would sedation be an option? Not a full general anaesthetic but just something to really relax you. I haven't had a cystoscopy, but have had a couple of colonoscopies and the last one was under sedation. Apparently, I was awake and chatting happily to the doctors the whole way through it, but when they took me back to my husband I was completely unaware that I'd had the procedure. The drugs just completely wiped my mind of the whole thing!

ThriftyWanabee

Nicki wrote: »

Would sedation be an option? Not a full general anaesthetic but just something to really relax you. I haven't had a cystoscopy, but have had a couple of colonoscopies and the last one was under sedation. Apparently, I was awake and chatting happily to the doctors the whole way through it, but when they took me back to my husband I was completely unaware that I'd had the procedure. The drugs just completely wiped my mind of the whole thing!

Not sure I could even bring myself to go to the hospital just now. I have thought about sedation but worry about not being in control. Do you know what meds they give you to sedate you?

candygirl

They will give you a GA, if you are too stressed to undergo the proceedure without it.My friend had a similar procedure, and it was fine:D:D

j.e.j.

Sorry you're going through all this angst. Sometimes it's fear of the unknown, isn't it? I'm assuming ultrasound is a non-invasive treatment, so you don't have to worry.

Can you pinpoint what it is exactly that you're frightened about? Is it the procedure, the not knowing, or just general white-coat phobia.

Just a few thoughts: If it helps, remember that you can say 'no' to anything you are not happy with, so you do have some control over the situation. But I'm guessing you would like to get the problem sorted, even though it makes you anxious, so maybe try some techniques like visualisation, or relaxation, counting breaths, etc. (I've found breathe in on 4, breathe out on 7 to be helpful, for some reason, lol, try it.)

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

ThriftyWanabee wrote: »

I'm dreading going to the dr as I know I'm probably overreacting and am worried if I tell them how I feel they'll think I'm a total idiot.

You know you're overreacting.

Talk to your GP. They may be able to prescribe something to take the edge of it, whatever may be most appropriate in your case, and then you can get the tests sorted out.

At present, I suspect you'll get in such a state if you don't say a word that you'll end up refusing the ultrasound as well.

So, please, speak to your GP. The odds are vastly in favour of it just being one of those things that you look back and wonder what all the fuss was about - but it is in your interest, both physically and mentally - to have all possibilities checked out.

It could so easily just be you just need to pick the antibiotic that is most effective on the germs, but he is doing the right thing in making sure any other causes are eliminated.

In any case, by seeing him and explaining how you feel, he can reassure you.


And no, you're not an idiot.

ThriftyWanabee

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

You know you're overreacting.

Talk to your GP. They may be able to prescribe something to take the edge of it, whatever may be most appropriate in your case, and then you can get the tests sorted out.

At present, I suspect you'll get in such a state if you don't say a word that you'll end up refusing the ultrasound as well.

So, please, speak to your GP. The odds are vastly in favour of it just being one of those things that you look back and wonder what all the fuss was about - but it is in your interest, both physically and mentally - to have all possibilities checked out.

It could so easily just be you just need to pick the antibiotic that is most effective on the germs, but he is doing the right thing in making sure any other causes are eliminated.

In any case, by seeing him and explaining how you feel, he can reassure you.


And no, you're not an idiot.

Thanks for not thinking I'm an idiot.

I really can't face a cystoscopy...I will speak to my gp and try and explain my feelings, fears, reasons etc. I just feel so totally stupid, but I cannot get past these feelings of terror.

I do desperately want to get the problem sorted but CANNOT think of having the cystoscopy

I hope I can explain myself with enough clarity to be prescribed something short term just to take away the sheer panic that all this is giving me.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

ThriftyWanabee wrote: »

Thanks for not thinking I'm an idiot.

I really can't face a cystoscopy...I will speak to my gp and try and explain my feelings, fears, reasons etc. I just feel so totally stupid, but I cannot get past these feelings of terror.

I do desperately want to get the problem sorted but CANNOT think of having the cystoscopy

I hope I can explain myself with enough clarity to be prescribed something short term just to take away the sheer panic that all this is giving me.

Fair enough. Your choice. But that one simple procedure, which is under anaesthetic (and I daresay you could be sedated as well), so doesn't really feel of much, could diagnose and even treat what is causing you so much worry.

It's not unusual for ladies to find it difficult to be examined.


I don't know if you have difficulties in other ways - making love, smear tests or the like - but perhaps you could benefit from some counselling as well; my local area offers what they call psychosexual counselling through the family planning clinic, but was done by a gynaecologist as her special interest, and it included ladies who for various reasons were completely unable to undergo any examination. Your GP may know of somewhere, if not, the local PCT or gynaecology department/genito-urinarydepartment of the hospital may be able to point you/him in the right direction.


As I say, it's up to you - maybe once you've spoken to your GP, and he has reassured you and helped however he feels is appropriate, your feelings might not be so overwhelming.



Either way, you aren't stupid, you're feeling scared.