Ex has stopped paying mortgage

caroline233

My ex and I split 18 months ago and luckily our house is a farmhouse, where the original longhouse and outbuildings had tenanta in it. They have moved out and I have moved in there so the kids can come & go between us. I have been paying him half the mortgage every month but after an argument last month he failed to pay the mortgage, which he had changed to come out of his account rather than the joint account we had been using prior to the split. I know he's short of money and it was Christmas but this month's is now due and I've today had a letter to say that the arrears haven't been paid. I'm not prepared to pay him the money every month to find that he's spent it and the mortgage hasn't been paid. However, when I asked Woolwich (Barclays) they told me we both had to sign to change the direct debit mandate to a different account. He won't do this for some reason. I have gone out & got myself a job and can afford to pay the mortgage and would rather do that than find it's not been paid.

1. Is there really no other way to change the direct debit/standing order to come out of my account without his consent? He obviously did it so how?

2. If I pay the full amount every month and he pays it too, what happens then?

laurel7172

Can you pay your half of the mortgage via a standing order?

However, I would strongly advise some good legal advice/mediation-you do not want to be at the mercy of someone who will trash your credit rating "after an argument". Nor do you want to be looking for somewhere else to live (because all pretence of civility breaks down as soon as you see somebody else) with a history of mortgage arrears. Arrangements such as yours require maturity on both sides...do not let your desire for an ultra-civilised solution blind you to whether your ex is capable of maintaining one.

Thrugelmir

You need a longer solution to the situation. Suggest you consult a solicitor .

Padstow

caroline233 wrote: »

My ex and I split 18 months ago and luckily our house is a farmhouse, where the original longhouse and outbuildings had tenanta in it. They have moved out and I have moved in there so the kids can come & go between us. I have been paying him half the mortgage every month but after an argument last month he failed to pay the mortgage, which he had changed to come out of his account rather than the joint account we had been using prior to the split. I know he's short of money and it was Christmas but this month's is now due and I've today had a letter to say that the arrears haven't been paid. I'm not prepared to pay him the money every month to find that he's spent it and the mortgage hasn't been paid. However, when I asked Woolwich (Barclays) they told me we both had to sign to change the direct debit mandate to a different account. He won't do this for some reason. I have gone out & got myself a job and can afford to pay the mortgage and would rather do that than find it's not been paid.

1. Is there really no other way to change the direct debit/standing order to come out of my account without his consent? He obviously did it so how?

2. If I pay the full amount every month and he pays it too, what happens then?

Calm down and get yourself a Consent Order dear.