"Why are you applying for this job"

ryan86uk

Afternoon ladies and gents, hope you are all well.....

As the Title may suggest, I'm looking for some advise/guidance with regards to that question that keeps popping up on job application forms.

Here's what I put on a recent application...... thoughts? Advise? Please!


"I have many reasons for applying for this position. Being a logistics controller with six years experience in the trade I wish to transfer the skills I have gained in the military and those gained as a contractor in the Middle East to a career that is fast paced, and challenging.

With my current employment aside I have always held a position within logistics and transportation of goods. In these roles I have always received vast amounts of job satisfaction and eagerness to see a job completed.

When employed in a supervisory capacity as a Logistics coordinator for Kellogg, Brown and Root in Dubai I was responsible for a team of movement operators. The position of Warehouse department manager has appealed to me greatly. I feel I am ready for a step up on the career ladder.

I regrettably was forced to resign from my employment in the Middle East due to job location and other personal circumstances. Although currently employed, and thankful for it, I have little passion with regards to my current position.

Having worked in a cosmopolitan environment, being highly motivated and possessing a strong passion for logistics I feel I would greatly benefit from this position. As a result XXXX will also benefit by having a keen, ambitious and methodical manager.

I hope you will consider my application and look forward to hearing from you in the near future."



Thanks in advance people :cool:

scheming_gypsy

The following line

Although currently employed, and thankful for it, I have little passion with regards to my current position.

Has the potential to be read completely differently how you want it to be read. What if you have little passion for this job? will you just stick it out till you find something more exiting?... are you worth them taking the risk?

ryan86uk

scheming_gypsy wrote: »

The following line



Has the potential to be read completely differently how you want it to be read. What if you have little passion for this job? will you just stick it out till you find something more exiting?... are you worth them taking the risk?

Very true, however I did feel It was necessary to mention it due to the job being significantly different to anything else I have done. Fingers crossed they read it they way it's intended. :eek:

SGina

I'm with S-G, Do you want to take the chance of them reading it negatively. Could you not word it differently to get your point across. The rest of the cover letter sounds positive.

spadoosh

I'd drop the jetsetting aswell, dunno why but, to me anyway, it makes you come across as arrogant or trying to appear better because you have travelled, they will see that from the jobs i dont think it need to be shouted about.

Love the second paragraph just the perfect amount of brown nosing (not meaning it in a bad way) just well worded

Also excuse my ignorance but !!!!!! is a movement operator??

scheming_gypsy

spadoosh wrote: »

Also excuse my ignorance but !!!!!! is a movement operator??

from

I was responsible for a team of movement operators. The position of Warehouse department manager

movement operators
warehouse manager


sounds like it's posh talk for labourers

WhiteHorse

Unfortunately, telling the truth ie "For the money", doesn't go down very well these days. You have to concoct some garbage about 'personal development', 'saving the planet' or similar hogwash.

ryan86uk

"Thank you for your application for the above post. After careful consideration we are sorry to advise you that we will not be progressing with your application. "

lol, that's another application failed !

Hmmmm... I've tried so many types of cover letters! What one person sees as "good" another sees it as "bad".

Back to the drawing board it is!

Acc72

ryan86uk wrote: »

Hmmmm... I've tried so many types of cover letters! What one person sees as "good" another sees it as "bad".

Firslty, I am sorry that this application was not successful.

However ........ I don't think that many recruiters would regard the comment "I regrettably was forced to resign from my employment in the Middle East due to job location and other personal circumstances" as being in any way good.

The mind could boggle at the potential personal circumstances that forced you to resign from your previous job.

Just completely remove this sentence. As said earlier, if asked why you left, just say that you want a new challenge or that you wanted to move back to the UK or something.

Mistral001

Sorry your were turned down. The original answer to the question was too rambling and gave the impression that you were not quite sure why you wanted to apply for the job in the first place and were avoid what is a very straight forward question requiring a straight forward answer.

I suggest you work out in your own head what you want. Work it out so that you are able answer the question directly. If you cannot do that then perhaps you picked the wrong job to apply for or should start thinking more about your present job and whether you are ready to move.

ryan86uk

Acc72 wrote: »

Firslty, I am sorry that this application was not successful.

However ........ I don't think that many recruiters would regard the comment "I regrettably was forced to resign from my employment in the Middle East due to job location and other personal circumstances" as being in any way good.

The mind could boggle at the potential personal circumstances that forced you to resign from your previous job.

Just completely remove this sentence. As said earlier, if asked why you left, just say that you want a new challenge or that you wanted to move back to the UK or something.

Thanks for the advice, I can see how it comes across now. It has now been deleted!

Do you personally think the wording of the other paragraphs are good? Grammar? Content?


It's like a crystal ball this "looking for a new job" game! :mad: