Because I'm bl**dy well worth it!

piano7

hypno06 wrote: »

Well, it is that time of year again - I have been on MSE now for 5 years, and December therefore generally marks a natural point of reassessing for me.....usually including a new diary....so why should this year be any different.

This is chapter 15. Will there ever be a final chapter? Who knows. I reckon it will be a bit like those long running sit coms where you get the final series ever after 10 years, only to be followed up by a Christmas special, a feature length movie, a couple of "prequels" and just as you thought it was safe to let go, a special Comic Relief DVD makes its appearance.......

So, anyway, where were we? Or rather, where am I? And the answer is "how the heck do I know?!?" :rotfl:

Moneywise, I get by. DD is 17 and has left college so all financial support for her has stopped, whether from XOH or child benefit etc. She doesn't earn much, only working part time on a temp contract, so is not yet self sufficient and contributing, but she knows that I can't throw money at her any more. She has one more block of driving lessons that I have agreed to pay for before her test at the beginning of January. If she fails it, she will have to fund the next set of lessons herself. She hasn't yet had a paypacket, and her contract could end very soon, so we will address her finances and contributions when things are a little more certain for her.

DS is 16, in his final year of high school, and looking to go to college to do catering in September. He has a Saturday job so generally funds his own "spends", although as a strapping sporty lad, his food bill doesn't get any cheaper! Driving lessons for him will start next year and having funded DD's, I will do the same for him.

Skiing - well, that continues, but to a far lesser extent, as there is just not the money to do it. It plays a big part in our lives, but this year for the first time, I don't have anything booked for myself, DS has just one week of training planned, and DD is actually heading out to the Alps in February to WORK instead of to play.

As you will all be aware, I am spending money on stuff for myself now. I have started to be "me".....definitely a work in progress but, oh what progress I have invested time, and money, in looking and feeling more like the person I want to be.

For years I was bottom of the pile, as many of us find ourselves - due to debts, kids, lack of time, lack of happiness in relationships, low confidence, low self esteem, blah blah blah. I am learning that my rightful place is much closer to the top of that pile, and I am worth so much more than I ever allowed myself to have before. This is not just money-wise....eg there wasn't previously the cash available to have regular salon visits before, but I now know that I can look good and feel good in so many ways that I had never given myself worthiness for in the past.

There has been a lot of addressing of what I want and, as importantly, what I don't want. For example, I don't want to be chasing the DFW line that I have been "forced" to follow in previous years. I actually have no desire to mystery shop, to do surveys, to get things on ebay, etc. I've done it to death, and I truly want to free up my time to keep myself in balance. This means no extra cash coming in at a time when my spending is possibly at its highest. HOWEVER, it is vitally important for me to make these decisions and not to force myself into doing something I don't want to do. For example, I was asked to teach yesterday as they found themselves without a tutor.....6 hours work - nice amount of money. But I simply didn't want to do it. So I said NO. :eek:

So, I will be looking to retain that element of doing only (within the constraints of good parenting, career enhancement and the like) what I want to do, for reasons that I choose. What those things will be, I don't know - I have changed my expectations and outlooks far more than I ever expected over the last few weeks as I have started to ditch some of the crap that was taking over my head.

This diary will follow that.....it won't be focused on every penny as it has been in the past, and essentially I am still a very private person in terms of my personal life, for various reasons, so I cannot vouch for its usefulness to anyone on MSE any more.....but it is here, anyone is free to contribute, and we'll just see how things pan out.

So, before this post gets banned for being the longest most boringest ever, I will submit......with just one statement:

Yes, I am bloody well worth it.....and I am so much bigger than anyone who thinks otherwise

Can you tell me how to start a new forum subject please

hypno06

piano7 wrote: »

Can you tell me how to start a new forum subject please

Go onto the "debt free diaries" page and about a third of the way down on the left hand side is a blue button that says something like "start new thread". click on there, type away, press submit and away you go!

Good luck

beanielou

piano7 wrote: »

Can you tell me how to start a new forum subject please

If you want to start a new thread for example on DFW you just go to the page that l;ists all the threads then near the top of the page on the left hand side there is a big button that says something like start a new thread~ the button is in blue.
One of these things that if you know how to do it then its easy and if not its like a foreign language or like me on FB!!
Hope this helps
Welcome to MSE.
Keep posting!

Surfbabe

We've just got back from the Open Water 10km Swim at the Serpentine in Hyde Park - managed to get tickets on Tuesday night, so have spent a lovely day in the sunshine with DS. Atmosphere is fantastic and all the volunteers and staff were so friendly and helpful.

Britain at its best - have got tickets for Paralympics athletics so we will get to go to the stadium!

I'm sure the finances will be sorted by October!

Tesco_points_addict

Hello....where did everyone go?

taxi73

Hypno very rarely comes on MSE any more

beanielou

Hypno is busy having a life in RL

hypno06

beanielou wrote: »

Hypno is busy having a life in RL

haha, yes - I certainly am doing that!

But I do pop my head in from time to time to see how people are doing - I just don't post and of course haven't updated for a while. There are plenty of photos on facebook for those that are into that sort of thing.

Needless to say, life is good. Happy and healthy. Can't ask for much more than that xxxx

:D:D

beanielou

Life being good happy & healthy is most excellent

gallygirl

I tried stalking Mr H on Sunday but couldn't find him .