How much to do for Register Office marriage?

miffyhugmuffin

Hi,

We are getting married on 21st Dec, it will be us plus the witnesses. We've been engaged for 18mth and didn't get round to arranging a wedding before I became pregnant. Baby is due 21st Feb. I'm wondering how much to do for the wedding, I will buy a new dress and probably get a bouquet for me and buttonholes for the witnesses. Afterwards we will go out for a meal. My ring has been ordered, we need to get OH's. After speaking to a friend she thinks we should do a bit more, for instance book a hotel for the night to make it more memorable. Part of me likes that idea, part wouldn't be bothered about going home afterwards. I want to be married, not fussed about a big fancy event. But it got me wondering if I should do a bit more.

I guess I'm wondering if it will be a bit weird having such a small wedding, I guess it is a bit weird! However, I'm quite shy so it suits me in a lot of ways. We really want to be married before the baby arrives.

Not sure whether to have the witnesses do 'readings', might feel a bit strange in such a small room (apparently it's just an office)? The witnesses will take photos, I will be looking very pregnant!

We will probably have a big party some time next year to invite more friends and family to celebrate not only our marriage but the arrival of our baby. In the meantime however, until then this will be our wedding day and I want to be able to look back and have good memories. Any ideas how to make it more special under the circumstances?

kal25

First off congrats miffyhugmuffin on your setting your big day :j Personally I think it's upto you everyone is individual. The only thing I will say which is what I said to my now hubby when organising ours is that you will only ever get your wedding day once.
The fact that it's about the marriage is great as that's how it should be.. For us we did things simply and cheap compared to others within a short space of time, and in all honesty I would not change a single thing..we enjoyed ourselves and so did alll our guests, which made the day even better.
If your shy it might be better just having a meal and maybe hotel after, as if you plan on having a party later for baby arrival people get chance to celebrate both occasions with you. You could maybe think of wearing your wedding dress at the party so people get to see how you looked ( and means you get to wear it twice ).
Hope you get things sorted and enjoy the organising

johannalf88

If you don't really see the point if booking a hotel (if you are getting wed near your home for example) why don't you try and make your home a bit special? Buy new bed sheets, get some flowers and choc, n some nice non-alcoholic fizzy. Make your own hotel in your house. Make sure you have the ingredients in the next day for breakfast, or go out for breakfast (that always feels special to me!)

I don't think it's weird that it is small- each to its own and if it is what you want then have it. About readings, I have heard that the ceremony can be very quick without them, to make it special to you maybe ask your witnesses to do a reading directed to you two, but let them choose it? It depends how well you know them, if they will be comfortable with it etc. But could be a nice surprise for you.

Hth and have a fantastic day!

wanchai_2

Congrats! I would say - do what YOU want to do Having said that, there are fab hotel deals on offer, so you *should* be able to pick up a hotel room very cheaply for the night, and it may be nice to have a change of scene for the night, just to treat yourselves

Oh and defo wear your wedding dress/outfit for the party afterwards if it still fits/can be adjusted!

Havea great day and post photos here afterwards xxx

Brighton_belle

Hey, congratulations, that is lovely news. We got married in September and didn't have any readings or anything. We did write our own vows for the exchange of rings, which you will be offered the opportunity to do when you get sent all the paperwork. (You don't have to though.)
Yes, our service was short but very beautiful, because we were getting married! The words the registrar read were really sincere and meaningful and valuing of our marriage and then our own vows obviously said the extra we wanted to say.
We chose not to have readings or music (other than something we loved to walk into) becasue there was nothing we already knew we loved IYSWIM. It felt contrived to us to search desparately for something suitable, and we felt quite shy of standing in front of others while the reading were going on. No regrets at all. Our guests were overwhelmed with the beautiful simplicity of it and felt it suited the pair of us very well.

Re the hotel, we did choose to spend one night away and as we haven't had a holiday in 6 yrs it was wonderful. But go with your instinct and what feels right for you.

trying_2_b_good

Congratulations!
We had readings at ours, and 50 guests (in a hotel). Even if you only have 2 guests, the readings are special in my opinion - maybe read a few and see if any stand out for you. They will be saying those special words to you. Why not ask the witnesses to choose their own, then it will be a suprise for you? My local registry office is a lovely room with twinkly stars in the ceiling - not just an "office" - why not go for a nosy around yours?

I would ask myself about the timings...if we get married at 1pm then go for a meal at 2pm, we'll finish at 4pm. Do I want to go home at 4pm or do I want it to continue? If I want to continue the celebrations, checking into a hotel will be special and lovely. I might even go for a swim with my new husband! Alternatively, I'll go back to our house and watch TV!

trying_2_b_good

Oh and for special little touches, get a few bubbles to blow, still have the confetti, still have little favours. If you get any cards beforehand, save them and open them after the meal. Still have a little speech from the groom (he shouldn't get off so easily!). Take a cake to the restaurant and cut it! Have balloons at the restaurant. Still get your nails done as a special pampering treat. Have the first dance when you get home (or in your hotel room). Why not go to town and create place name cards for your meal - anything to see your name written as "Mrs"! You can keep those forever.

Mrs_Arcanum

Do you or your OH like a particular cake? You could have something made up to cut at the restaurant & send pieces to anyone who couldn't make it. Do you have a friend with a good camera to take some decent digital pictures of the occasion?

Another keepsake option is a wedding plate. Some of the pottery painting places do large plates which all the guests can sign. These are then carefully over painted & fired.

Good luck & hope your day is wonderful whatever you choose to do.