2012 Frugal Living Challenge (Part 1)

Emmala

mumwithamission wrote: »

OH dear - Valentine's evening atmosphere ruined when DH asked what I'd been doing and I showed him the total debt - he's not happy, had no idea it was that bad either. Seems really angry, but we've been together 20 years and with no secrets between us surely this is a joint problem...? Feel that I'm being held responsible. Doesn't seem to be any consolation to him either that I am tackling this head on.

Snap! I can completely sympathise as my husband was exactly like this!!!! He always had it in his head that any debt/spending was MY fault and nothing to do with him, so it meant that every time I tried to have a conversation with him about money we'd end up falling out and it became easier to not bother. Then he had to admit that he'd run up £5K on his card because 'where do you think the money comes from every time I buy something'?......this was always his attitude, he'd turn it back on me!!!! :mad: So, yes, it WAS partly my fault as I never really thought about HOW he paid for stuff, but I did point out that it wasn't my fault as I wasn't exactly pointing a gun at his head whenever he typed in his pin number!!!!!!

Anyway, it was this Christmas that we finally got to a point we could talk without blame, and OMG it was SOOOO liberating!!!! I'd done my research, come up with a plan and told him straight, and for once he listened. SO with a debt a similar size to yours, and wanting to remortgage (re fix) later this year, we felt that to keep juggling 0% cards wouldn't work for us, so we took out a Sains loan instead. It's over 5 years but we hope to pay it off in three. It means we have one payment, less than before trying to pay different cards, and we now have some 'spare' money each month to use instead to putting on a CC and paying off after. We have reduced the limits of our ODs (we have two accounts, one needs closing) and also the number and credit limit of the cards he has.....we now have one for internet purchases which is paid off monthly, and he has two for work, but even with these I have got him to have a reasonable amount of credit limit (needs to be quite a bit as he pays for flights regularly, and his boss has been know to not pay his expenses in one go before, which left us right in the poo!)

Sorry to waffle on, but I wanted to say you're not the only one, and I know exactly how frustrating it can be! And also, we are now much happier knowing that we have faced things together and will resolve them together....not that we were unhappy before, but it's removed a cause of worry/friction. I hope that helps you a bit xxxx

Frugaldom

Thrifty85 wrote: »

I'm feeling so disheartened today .

Car tax, insurance, mot, service and building and contents insurance all due at the end of this month. Took car in for MOT this morning and it failed. It's not too much to repair but it's still extra money I hadn't accounted for.

Spent 3 whole days checking comparison sites, going direct to companies, haggling with previous insurers, checking cashback etc etc and the cheapest quote I can get for car insurance this year is £640.

Is there any way you could get a smaller car, as it sounds as though something about your current one is bumping up your premiums?

I worked out that it costs my 35p for every mile I drive by the time I add in the tax, insurance, servicing, MOT, parts and maintenance, hence the rason I don't travel very far. Works out at £14 for a return trip to my nearest supermarket, so I'm cheaper paying P&P to somewhere like ROSSPA for my groceries.

Thrifty85

Frugaldom wrote: »

Is there any way you could get a smaller car, as it sounds as though something about your current one is bumping up your premiums?

Unfortunately I can't go much smaller than a clio with a 1litre engine!! The insurance cost is so high because of where I live. There's been a surge in "smash for cash" claims, exaggerated whiplash claims etc. So it appears that I am having to pay the cost for this. So frustrating but I am a firm believer that karma will swing its way back round.

Frugaldom

mumwithamission wrote: »

OH dear - Valentine's evening atmosphere ruined when DH asked what I'd been doing and I showed him the total debt - he's not happy, had no idea it was that bad either. Seems really angry, but we've been together 20 years and with no secrets between us surely this is a joint problem...? Feel that I'm being held responsible. Doesn't seem to be any consolation to him either that I am tackling this head on.

This sounds like a very familiar situation so please try not to take it personally, no matter how bad or how guilty OH may make you feel. It really does seem to be more of a 'man thing' that anything you have done wrong. I'm guessing he's employed and you're married, but there's still that mindset in men that, as husbands, they shouldn't need to worry about anything like that - as long as they earn, the wife should housekeep.

I don't mean this post to sound derogatory or cone across as man-haterish, it's just an observation that men tend to deal less with household finances as long as there's a woman around.

Chin up, Mumwithamission, you know have your full mission laid out on the table and he knows you are trying to do something about it. Good luck and keep on frugalling.

Thrifty85 - Could you add any older, named drivers to your policy or park your car elsewhere? I have use of my son's car and for that pleasure, it costs him about £100 a year less. Mind you, if you have just paid the policy, this is a bit late.

I guess the best idea is to count up every penny the car costs over each year, including the actual cost of buying it in the first place, then compare those costs to what it would cost you had you to rely on buses, trains and taxes. I think you could change the perspective a little by including the car as one of the costs of being employed - getting to and from work needs to be considered. HTH

cw18

Frugaldom wrote: »

I worked out that it costs my 35p for every mile I drive by the time I add in the tax, insurance, servicing, MOT, parts and maintenance

Just done the sums for mine based on 4.5k miles/year (actually did 4152 last year)

I added up petrol (based on 9 miles/litre, I seem to have averaged somewhere between that and 10), insurance (last years premium), road tax (this years figure), breakdown cover (this years), service/mot (last years) and a small amount for repairs (more than last year, but not a huge amount more)

This gives me a cost of 36.4p/mile

mumwithamission

Thanks so much for your comforting words and support dizzielizzie, Igamogam, Kylieminoag, rae18 and Frugaldom. I know in my heart that the only way is up now - I just fret when I hear statistics linking money problems and relationship breakdowns. Would hate it if by facing and tackling the problem things got worse than by sticking our heads in the sand. Will plod on with my mission though

Kylieminoag

Good morning all!

Please could you offer any advice?

I have inherited a rather luxurious feather and down duvet but it smells a little stale and the covering has turned a bit yellow/looks grubby. It doesnt have any washing instructions. The cover is marked as pure cotton. Am I ok to put it in the washing machine or do you think I should pay to have it dry cleaned:eek::eek:?

I'd be very grateful for any ideas.

Thanks

mumwithamission

I've always washed them in the machine - if they fit! But I do have the luxury of a tumble dryer which helps - if you don't I'd be tempted to wait for a warm breezy day before doing it yourself. HTH

enjoyfinancialchallenges

rising_from_the_ashes wrote: »

Ohhhh Thrifty - (((hugs)))

When I finally cleared my debts towards the end of last year, I set up a load of budgeting pots and transfer money each payday (similar to EFC's account but I'm not yet confident enough to keep all the money in one account as I'd lose track of what belonged to what budget IYSWIM).
...

Thrifty85.......:o sorry ,I have been giving you a different name. Ooooops!

I didnt make it clear did I, I have lots of savings accounts the one I mentioned is just for the money that has to be paid annually, like car MOT and service, insurances etc.

I have an oil account and have to put £100.00 a month away in that as oil is expensive and I would never find the money to pay £6oo + at a time. There is also what I call my stash account that any odds and ends I have left over go to. Plus I have a Grandson Account that I put just £25 a month away in. He is at university so I help him at odd times when he has bills to pay and no cash. I realise it does not help him to learn to budget but he never asks for money, I put it in his account when I hear he is having problems paying a bill or the like.

Another account I hold is for my regular savings, just so I can feel a bit secure if I have an emergency, its only £25 but acts as my security blanket for things like renewing my passport. I suppose it could be called my any other expenses account. My pensions comes in at different times of the month so I just put the money away as and when I can. I have an expenses book that I look at daily much like all you clever folk do your budget online, I doubt I could get my head around that though as I'm not very technical minded. I just tick my book when its been paid.

I did a 0% balance transfer last year just so I could clear my Credit Card BUT it will have to be paid back in May when the charges start being added, I do all I can to prevent charges so save monthly for that also. Another savings account!

Probably to others my budget looks v complicated and my accounting haphazard( spelling !but my spell checker has dissapeared) but I manage to keep an eye on it, the biggest problem is keeping my CC bills down, I allow myself £350 a month for food, petrol, haircuts shoe menders, birthday gifts etc etc, any purchase I make when I can use my card, as I explained before I have a Te*** card and have my vouchers sent once a year at Christmas and it really helps a lot. I always reuse my bags and check each time that I have been given the points for that. Rereading all this I realise what a meaney I sound but it works for me I just have to keep an eye on things.

All my other DD and SO are listed in my book and get ticked off as they go out from my account, I actually get a thrill knowing its paid.(sad really) Having various savings accounts I know where I stand and I earn a little interest, not much these days but a every little helps( sorry )

Sorry to ramble on but if it helps anybody else thats good. X
Have a good day all, I shall have to rest after this marathon post.

PS. have just remembered I have another savings account for my Marmalades and baking etc. that I sell. I dont have a purpose for this money just nice to see it growing and will use it to start next years ISA with.

enjoyfinancialchallenges

Kylieminoag wrote: »

Good morning all!

Please could you offer any advice?

I have inherited a rather luxurious feather and down duvet but it smells a little stale and the covering has turned a bit yellow/looks grubby. It doesnt have any washing instructions. The cover is marked as pure cotton. Am I ok to put it in the washing machine or do you think I should pay to have it dry cleaned:eek::eek:?

I'd be very grateful for any ideas.

Thanks

My daughter always takes her duvets to the launderette their drums are much bigger. When it comes to washing feathers I can't help but imagine a wet chicken running around, that soon puts me off washing them. I just don't buy feathers anymore, easier. Not a lot of help am I. X