I need help to get my life back

blu1974

Hi im a 32 year old guy i have a lovely partner and 2 great little lads we have had our house for 6 years now and lived here since.My problems started about 4 years ago i went to the bank for a simply visit i ended up comeing out with a £6000 loan and a £1000 credit card it all seem great at the time my partner also had a credit card etc.We both work and hold good jobs with a good income so we kept borrowing from the banks to pay back our cards and swor to our selves that we wont use the cards.Time went on more loans and before we knew it im now in a complete mountian of debt.I feel very low and depressed at times i have even cryed along with my partner and kicked my self over and over again how stupid i am and i blame my self for getting us in this situation that now is really starting to control our life.At present i manage to pay ever think as in my bills etc i work as much over time as i can just so we have some money to get us through the month we both work really hard and my partner who also works long hours and then has to do every think at home once shes in just upsets me even more as i would like her to be able to have some quality time with us but at the moment its all work to pay our bills and our loans etc.At present i have now come to terms with the fact we are both in debt and we really need to do some think its getting to the stage where im starting to dislike my house as its the cause of my problems and i feel like packing up phone my debters and saying have the house ive got nothing more to give and just getting away from it.My parents know the situation im in and keep telling me you will find a way out and lets get the ball rolling etc.So i was looking on line and came across this site and i felt better just reading about people who have come through it and now lead a better life.Now the bad bit how much we owe
Abbey national £75,000
First plus £71,000
Loyds tsb loan £5240
My credit card loyds tsb £1800
my partners cards about £4000.

The first plus one i dont know why we even went for it i feel sick just thinking about them how they have had me for as much money as they can get.I took out a £60,300 loan with them and they sold me this PPI insurance i thought it was just a premium that i paid and i could cancel when i want but how wrong i was i phoned up to cancel it and was told i will lose this and that all jargon i also asked for a final settlement figure on my loan which i though th loan was £60300.When i got the settlement it was for £7100 and when i looked at it they had took out a £15000 loan on top of the £63000 which takes it to £75,000 i was shocked and i got all the paper work out and when i looked at the agrement it is there but in a small box saying ppp loan i dont no why but at the time i just didnt take any notice of it and we signed.Yesterday i had a statement of abbey national explaining my mortgage and how much i owe etc it says 69,000 thats my mortgage and when we first had the house they gave us a £5,500 loan on my mortgage but when we took the first plus loan out first plus said they were going to pay it off and send a cheque direct to abbey i have this in writing saying they will be paying it.I phoned abbey and they have said that first plus has not paid them anythink so for 13months i have been paying abbey still not even knowing it and first plus havent paid them i currently pay first plus £650 a month on the amount agreed.I havent told them yet as i dont really know what to do also to add insult to me i have asked them about cancellin this ppi and there saying you still have to pay them the £11,000 remaining on the policy i have already paid the over £3000 and all they have done is knock £3000 off.Im sorry if this sounds confusing as i feel crap just writing about it i dont know now where to turn and what to do please anyone who can give me advice and what to do would be a real help as i said sorry its sound confusing thanks

Skint_Catt

You've made the first step and posted on here!!!!

Congrats n welcome.

We're all here to help.

The first thing other members will want is an SOA (Statement of Affairs) which is basically you telling us your income, ALL outgoings (down to the penny), your percentage rates on your debts and the min payments.

Good luck - it's the first day of the rest of your life.

S_C

Toomuchdebt

So you're paying your mortgage from Abbey and also the loan from First Plus and the loan was meant to pay off the mortgage?Or am I confused?

blu1974

The abbey is my mortgage and the first plus was to clear all my debt of so its like another mortgage i pay £453 on my abbey and £650 on the first plus sorry im not the best speller and im bad at explaing things thanks for your reply also.

charl8888

Hi and welcome...as Toomuchdebt said, is the first plus loan to pay off the mortgage? Is it a better rate of interest? Whatever happens if one is to pay off the other it should be paid asap so you avoid doubling up on the interest. You should pay what is owed minus the ppi if that is in dispute - but if you have signed for it it may be hard to contest.

It would be really helpful if you could put both of your incomes and all your various outgoings so people can help you with the detail.

Don't worry there are plenty in the same boat as you and by coming here you have taken the 1st step to sorting it all out.

charl8888

sorry blu78 I hadn't read your reply when I posted!

blu1974

hi the first plus loan is my debt plus my credit cards so i pay out on both my abbey mortgage and first plus.
My personal income at the moment is between £1200 to £1600 a month depending on overtime plus im due another 8% payrise by end of the year my partner also picks up £1053 a month so between us on a flat month no overtime i would say £2250 if i do o/t sometimes £2600 but you cant depend on overtime can you.I havent got all the intrest details to hand at the min but will have tomorrow so as soon as i do i will post but roughly at the min this is what i pay ever month
Abbey £453
First plus £653
Loyds tsb loan £118
I pay all my gas and electric and council tax through secure homes thats £314 my child care £260 which is a private thing not a registered child minder
house insurance etc is £49
cable £25
my mobile £25
i have another insurance policy for if i lose my job etc £21
my credit card min payment £40
my partners £60
Then theres our food so as you can see im sailing very close the wind were just always broke i will post all the details again tomorrow to the exact coin and all the intrest and thanks again for just takeing the time to read my posts thanks.

Little_Miss_Winner

Hello and welcome to mse!

Please don't ever apologise for spelling or the inability to explain yourself. You have done a great job with the typing you have made. If ever anyone is unsure of anything you type they will ask, dont worry about that.

Right, i know you have listed incomings, bills, and debts.

But i'm sure theres a few things you must have missed off, you need to have a look through your bank statements and see what you pay each month.

For incomings, what about child benefit, and working family tax credits?

For outgoings, what about cars/petrol/mot/tax. Phones/water etc.
What about socialising? NIghts out /eating out/ days out with kids/ haircuts / dentist / opticians / birthdays / holidays / christmas...

You need to account for every penny so that we can see what youearn VERSUS what you spend.

That way it will make it a little clearer, and save you being bombarded with questions.

Get all this info together with your wife, maybe tomorrow if you both dont work, then when you have all the figures, post it back, then we can work it out for you together.

Hugs
pot
x

blu1974

I will do all of that as youve stated and ill get my partner to type and she is far better than me at explaing and typing etc plus we have both decide to have the weekend off so we have got time to sort the dettails out and spend some time with our kids i really appreciate peoples replys and thanks again for takeing the time to reply thanks.

Little_Miss_Winner

Your welcome.

if you get a minute have a look and use Southernscousers template to help you when your working out you statement of affairs, click this link to have a nosey.

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=107280

ms_london

Hi Blu!! Welcome to MSE!! So pleased you found the website, its great isnt it, and a lifesaver (sometimes literally!) for those of us in debt...

Most of all you will realise you are not alone, which I hope helps somewhat?

I am a bit confused over the first plus/mortgage issue, I dont think its the way youve explained it, just the way my brain is (or isnt) working! But you need to sort this out pronto, could you contact the Citizens Advice Bureau, are First Plus a legit company?

Whilst you are doing this, call up your other creditors & try to negotiate your repayments - esplain your situation and the fact you are having financial difficulties (they may want to see a copy of your SOA), and ask them if they can freeze interest & charges (sounds cheeky, but some of them will accept!) and ask if you can make a lower repayment which you can afford. They will propose a monthly repayment, usually for say 3 or 6 months, but youve got to stick to this otherwise they wont be so inclined to help. I think if you are honest with them and stick to your word they will do their best to help you.

You need to write down a budget (the SOA), and list EVERYTHING you owe, from your mortgage to an unpaid parking ticket (for example!), and list everything that needs to be paid & when, i.e., gas, electric, water, council tax, car insurance, petrol, food, tv licence, everything...

Having it in black and white is scary but it also helps get your head around things. But definately get onto your creditors pronto, its scary but youll feel so much better.

I remember when i did this and at the time I had about 15 creditors, it was pretty awful, but I felt so much better after when I had agreed repayments (that I could afford!!) and some had even frozen my interest!!

You've obviously got a loving family, dont let the debt ruin it, people make mistakes, but you are doing the right thing by wanting to get yourself straight. Dont let your past dictate (and ruin) your future, and certainly dont let it ruin your health!!

Let us know how you get on, I'll pop in and see how you're doing - you can do it!!

Big hugs xx