What to do?...[Parent related!]

alipops1986

Hello All,

I'm a little torn about a predicament I find myself in.

So here goes. My parents have emmigrated to literally the other side of the world, they left nrly 2 years ago and i saw them in August just gone.

My OH and I got engaged last month and have started looking at venues as well as churches. I have got a little stressed about the cost and how to go about things, at this stage my parents were fine with us looking/viewing venues etc without them being here.

Then, following my stress last week, I received an email from them saying not to stress, just wait until they return home for good next May, then we can sort it out. My OH agreed, saying as we're looking at Summer 2013 there's no need to stress!

Fast forward a week, my parents have gone away this week on holiday and things have fallen into place. We've decided on a venue, albeit a more expensive one than anticipated and are planning to meet the vicar of the local church next week. So, on my parents return from their holiday, I hope to tell them all this news and book somewhere!

But, i'm starting to feel a little bad/apprehensive for getting on with things and how they'll react, especially as they seem to want me to wait for them to get back but i fear this would only complicate matters and they'd "encourage" us into their POV.

Plus, there are going to be plenty of other jobs they can get involved in on their return!

What would you do?

Thanks in advance,
Alipops x

elliebobs

Seriously: I wouldn't worry. I'm sure your folks will be fine. If you explain that you saw the venue and fell in love with it and wanted to secure a booking.

There are waaaaaay loads of other things that they can be involved in.

MrsDrink

I guess it depends on how much of the bill they will be footing. If they are paying for everything and the venue you've chosen is extortionate then I would say perhaps you should have waited. (I've obviously taken the extreme example here and not implying your venue is extortionate.)

Weddings - they are just so much fun to organise what with trying to please everyone lol.

alipops1986

Thanks MrsDrink and Elliebobs!

They are going to contribute but we are not anticipating that they pay for everything - funnily enough the venue is a more expensive one, but one which we can afford to contribute to and are happy to pay for it ourselves.

You're right about trying to strike the right balance between different family members. I've said to my OH, as long as we know we can pay for it, then I think we should just go for it and then anything that is contributed is a bonus. Plus, our budget has massively over budgeted in various areas in just case!

Lollie79

If your worried about upsetting them because you have found a venue without them, why not say that when you were ringing round venues lots of them were already ready booked up for the date you want so you felt you had to book this venue incase you missed out!
It could be true lol if you leave it too late your options maybe me limited.