Getting out and Keeping out of debt!

mildredalien

Well I definitely do! I know HOW to budget and live relatively frugally, I just don't DO it :P

I suppose we both have to find things that help us to stay motivated and stay to plan. For me, I've worked out a detailed budget, moved money into a separate account for random expenses that don't occur every month so I'm not tempted to spend it, and will be trying to take required cash out at the beginning of each week so I can physically see how much I have to last me rather than just shoving it on a debit card and forgetting about it. Setting myself a 'debt free date' really helped too, now that I can see when this could all end, I don't want to stretch it out any longer than I have to!!

Maybe setting yourself a realistic date for when to clear your credit card, and how much you can spare each month to pay towards it could help you to focus?

Phil3822

Been avoiding coming on here as been so bad. Have a wedding to attend now in December which is other side of country. I am best man. All happened really quickly as friends dad has been diagnosed with lung cancer and only has to new year to live. Anyway, this will cost a fair chunk which has sucked all the motivation from me.

I also have been buying Christmas presents from ebay which has gone well but have again puchased family treats and food that we did not NEED.

Weigh myself tomorrow aswell and probably have put on weight again.

If I could get round not popping to the shop daily for chocolate and treats I would be much happier. I have been doing this for years and cannot break the chain. No self control

Saucer_2

Having been lurking for a few days, I finally registered so I could reply to you.

I think that other people will totally empathise with what you are currently going through, feelings and all.

I used to be a compulsive spender (on food), who turned into a compulsive eater (because I had bought it and couldn't bear to throw it out) and it all got out of control.

I also went to the resourcefulcook site to sort my meals, and dropped my spending from £120 to £75 a week for 2 adults, my 19yo son who returns from uni at weekends and the dog - and thats meals, snacks and all.

I think maybe it isn't so much the fact that you like spending, but the fact that you put yourself into a situation where you spend - if you want a take out meal a week, then factor the cost into your weekly plan, that way you won't feel guilty and it stops you getting the rubbish feelings. If you are so desperate for a snack at times then add it to your weekly shopping list.

Just concentrate on one thing at a time, and remember that baby steps still count when it comes to achievement. You've already taken the first step, you set up your diary and bared your soul to the world :T

Phil3822

Welcome Saucer and thanks for your reply. I have been really pleased with our shopping spending. Kept on budget with this part but its the sweats after work and in evening etc that kill my waist line and pocket.

I do like spending I must say. I spend on unplanned stuff daily

Saucer_2

Then maybe make them planned? I'm not sure that going cold turkey on the spending is going to work for you, and if it helps at all, I haven't been able to either. I know £75pw on food is a lot still but I'm going bit by bit to get it down to a more reasonable level.

You're going to have to stay focussed on this and maybe change your budget a little as I'm not sure it totally reflects the amount you are spending now and looks more like what you would like it to be, for instance the extra you spend on groceries (sweets, takeaways, snacks) and the clothing which you have at £10 a month.

You've got groceries at £150pm, that's really tight, perhaps you should increase it to £200pm and add in a couple of takeaways and a few snacks. Its really hard to go to the shops for just one thing - how often have you nipped in for a bar of chocolate and come out with enough to keep everyone going for the weekend?

As far as the weight loss goes, have you measured yourself as well? Muscle is heavier than fat but less dense, so you could be losing inches but gaining pounds, and I know which I'd rather happen. After all, we don't buy clothes by our weight, but by inches/cm.

Phil3822

Thanks again. I am an all or nothing kinda guy. If I fail, I fail big time and got the whole hog. Others have also suggested the idea of setting a treat budget but I find this concept really difficult to accept. It is something I agree with and must try though.

Phil3822

Still failing and now at an increasing rate. I am best man for a wedding which is the other side of the country which is going to be a weekend away. On top of that I have to organise a stag do. Come about quickly due to friends OH's father being diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. Also had a huge electric bill come through which I have not got my head around. Add all this to Christmas and my normal uncontrolled habbits and I am heading down fast.

Wife and I have just sat down and tried to write down some promises and commitments of sorts. I feel like this thread has been a waste of time as it really has not gone how I wanted or hoped. Of course, I do not think your responses are a waste.

mildredalien

Sorry you are feeling down about your situation Phil

Maybe you could try a spending diary/logging things in this thread to keep a track of what you are spending and where? That could help you focus on where the money is actually going! Have you tried strategies like leaving your cards at home and only taking a certain amount of money out to spend, having different money 'pots' for different things etc?

At the end of the day diary threads aren't useful for everyone, and they aren't a magic answer to help you get a grip on your spending! Only you can do that I hope you find something that works for you.