Social Worker Problems :'(

blue_monkey_2

I read this and thought 'ex husband' too, is your EH the father of your other children? There must be a reason why they have singled out your 17 yo, he is nearly an adult and would not even be in the care system at that age, would he?

Toto

I'm another one who thought ex husband. If social services had child protection concerns, I would have thought they would have been much more interested in discussing the 4 year old than the 17 year old. Another interesting thought is perhaps the 17 year old has either contacted them because he wants his own place, possible egged on my friends? Or even given a big sob story to a friend's parents to get a bit of attention? pure speculation and guesswork really but that's all I can come up with.

Personally I would write a letter asking outright why they are visiting and on what grounds, I wouldn't phone or have face to face meetings until I had a clear answer to my questions. I'd sent the letter recorded delivery and tell them to respond in writing. I'd also contact a family lawyer to help put a complaint together because it seems to me they haven't acted in a manner which complies with policy or guidelines.

blue_monkey_2

Agreed Toto, they would be interested in ALL the kids, not just the eldest and getting him to move out which is why I asked if they all had the same dad.

What about paternal grandparents and relations? Could any of them work in an environment that could somehow end up involving social workers - especially for all of those things to happen. Maybe they have asked to see your son and you have said no and so they have dragged it up again?

The other thing nagging at my brain is, is this woman actually a REAL social worker? Are you sure this is not someone fake? With a fake ID? Have you called the SS and asked to speak to her? Have you spoken to someone other than her in SS to verify she is the person she says she is? Have you always had the same SW or is this someone different?

I think you need to find yourself a solicitor ASAP as well and get them to find out what is going on.

Might also be worth going to your MP too, they usually have local surgeries, and he can find out just what is going on and tell tham just what the SW has been doing so far. Something is definately not right here.

This site might be useful OP: http://www.gscc.org.uk/page/42/The+conduct+process.html Why not give them a call and speak to them on Monday.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Is the social worker or their sister dating the biological father?



This stinks.

Kay_Peel

I suspect that your 17 year old son knows more about this than he's letting on.

He was interviewed at school rather than in your presence. I only know of a couple of reasons why that would happen
- the child requested it because they felt better able to talk freely without the parents there
- it's in the interests of the child, for instance where parents are unco-operative or obstructive

Lo and behold, your son claims that they recommended that he should get his own flat! Did he say why they thought this? What was the problem that he raised with them and that made them think of this solution?

They may be treating the information that he gave them in confidence and that's why they are stonewalling you and being evasive.

Have another word with him - you might find that he's phoned Childline.

onetomany

Kay_Peel wrote: »

I suspect that your 17 year old son knows more about this than he's letting on.

He was interviewed at school rather than in your presence. I only know of a couple of reasons why that would happen
- the child requested it because they felt better able to talk freely without the parents there
- it's in the interests of the child, for instance where parents are unco-operative or obstructive

Lo and behold, your son claims that they recommended that he should get his own flat! Did he say why they thought this? What was the problem that he raised with them and that made them think of this solution?

They may be treating the information that he gave them in confidence and that's why they are stonewalling you and being evasive.

Have another word with him - you might find that he's phoned Childline.

i used to get interveiwed at school all the time its because its away from the home also i never ask for it

blue_monkey_2

Kay Peel: The mother can chuck her son out at 16 and not have to financially keep him anymore. Let's just say the son has done that, why would the SW tell her that he can have a flat and SHE would have to pay for that flat? She would not be financially responsible for him and he is able to move out of his own free will as he is over 16.

This is the bit that, to me, sounds as if there are other factors at play here.

rachbc

Are you sure SW actually saw son and son is not pulling a fast one? Or simply 'misunderstood' what SW has said. IME Children's services Social Care are very reluctant to take on anyone over 16. At 16 if he lived alone he could claim benefits (Income Support and HB) so there is no reason social care should be expecting you to pay for it.

missk9

I dont have any advice, but what has happened to you and your family is awful.. im sosorry you have had to go through all this... i HATE the feelings of having to front things out because you are so paranoid about a report being made.
My daughters school reported her as being overweight, which she is a little but nothing to worry about in this instance and I had all sorts of people getting involved and I really wanted to just say GO AWAY and leave us alone. But had heard of Health Visitors getting SS involved before so I am going along with everything with a smile on my face..its disgusting and even got to the point of my daughter saying she may try to NOT EAT...
I hope you get things sorted soon

StressedAndDepressed

My thinking was that they wouldn't be involved past 16 unless he contacted them but he swears he didn't and he also swears that she insisted on the flat which he has now said she insisted on a hostel or flat so that bit has changed.

The things he says she asked about my ex who is is his dad (sorry for not explaining that bit ), were a little strange to say the least. She wanted to know why he left (he cheated), when he left (2000) where he works (factory 8 miles away), were he lives (couple miles up the road), and when he last saw him (nearly 5 years ago) and we have tried constantly to get him to see him but he's not interested.

Other things that he is claiming are that she referred to my husband as a control freak and that no one does anything without his say so! (he can't control the 4 year old never mind a 17 year old! ).

I am starting to think some of you may be correct and that my son may have started this to get himself a flat for him and his mates, he hates that we ask him come home by 10pm and regularly turns up in the early hours!
What I don't understand is why he would not just say he wants his own place rather than putting us all through this , he had the opportunity to look for a job and get his own place but he decided to go back to 6th form, we didn't make him do it.