Parents in debt!!!

RAS

Also, please check that they are both getting the older persons' tax allowance. You have to ask for this.

And get a full list of DDs and SOa from the bank.

Review everything; I cut my mother's monthly payment by between 30 and 60 percent, for everything.

Pinksocks_2

I have tried to get the paperwork from her today but she hasn't got any she had been shredding the statements as she had kept it a secret from my Dad. The whole thing is a nightmare not quite sure where to start!!! I'm so worried for her health but she has told my Dad last night.

I have tried to get her to cancel the appointment with the bank as I don't think they will help. I don't think she can pay the credit cards this month that's why I wanted to write to them so she doesn't default.

Not sure where the rest of the money goes to, I will try to find out and let you all know so I can get a better picture of the whole mess.

Thanks again, I feel a bit better now.

Pinksocks_2

Sorry new to all of this.

Yes Tixy the loan and one of the credit cards is with their bank.

RAS

Ok

1. Since dad does not seem to have known about this debt, are the cards and loans in joint names or mum sole name?

2. Before mum goes to see the bank, she MUST open a new basic bank account in her name/joint names (it may be better for them to have one each). They need to ensure that all their income sourses are paid into that/those accounts and transfer over the DDs for all the household items before they let the bank know there are problems.

Otherwise, as soon as the bank know, they may wait until the next lot of money comes in and then freeze the account, taking all that month's money to offset against the debts. This is legal, so they need to take action to avoid it.

The new basic account needs to be with a bank that has no association with their existing one. It does not need a credit check and they may be able to open it on-line.

Pinksocks_2

The credit cards are in Mums name. The loan is in joint names as it has been running before my Dad had a stroke.

I will get Mum to get a new bank account. My Mum is a bit old school and thinks that banks are there to help them.

I know that changing her bank account will really upset her, as they get their income from pensions, disability payments.

Will this take time to change? as I know she will panic that the money won't go in on time to pay the bills.

Thanks.

RAS

Get the income moved across and then move the DDs.

You need to ask the new bank how long this will take to set up.

Maybe you need to sit down and help her list the date income comes in and the date payments go out, then pick the best date to make the shift.

If needs be, if there is one payment that will be a problem, she needs to ring the company and pay on the card and cancel the DD that month.

RAS

Pinksocks wrote: »

The loan is in joint names as it has been running before my Dad had a stroke.

So if there is PPI (and there usually is) have they claimed on it since his stroke?

What was the outcome?

Pinksocks_2

Sorry not sure if there is PPI on the loan. They had a small payout from medical cover insurance. I will find out tomorrow, never even thought of that. Thank you for that.

My parents have never discussed their finances with me ever, which is fair enough. Since their health has been declining they seemed to have lost their way and have been too proud to ask for help, even from me. I just wished they had asked sooner. Makes me want to cry. I'll do whatever it takes to help, but I know it's going to be hard and it's a puzzle at the moment. I'll get there somehow!

Thanks to everyone for your help you have given me a lot to think about.

I will post tomorrow after seeing Mum again.

rising_from_the_ashes

Pinksocks, just wanted to say (((hugs))) and I know what a shock it must've been.

Re asking for help - pride will have had a lot to do with this and not wanting to admit there's a problem. I never told my parents I was in debt (they found out eventually) as I was sure they'd be disappointed in me and I felt like I'd let them down - your mum probably feels the same.

Pinksocks_2

Aww thanks for that, this whole mess has made me think of my finances too. I'm going to save for things instead of using my credit card and pay more to my mortgage...well I can try!!