Advice needed - helping depressed mum

RAS

Hi

This comes under the term elder abuse. Talk to Age UK (combine charity) about the issue. Try to the bigger branch in the area where you live or she lives, as they usually have more specialist advisors. You need to ask the doctors to make a home visit if mum is too anxious to cope with the surgery.

And certainly speak to CAP rather then CAB; one only a small percentage of CAB advisors have debt training and two, CAP do home visits and offer basic and enhanced support.

Mrs_Boo_Boo

Contact her local Social Services who can help her with rehousing.

foxgloves

It sounds as though 2 problems could maybe be tackled if she could move into a one-bedroomed flat. Living expenses would be cheaper and there wouldn't be spare rooms for free loaders. That way, your siblings can start taking responsibility for their own lives & come to terms with the fact that 2 adults living off their mother while refusing to pay regular rent/keep is in no way an acceptable lifestyle choice.

rosyw

I feel very sorry for your poor mum, and have been in a similar position myself, so can understand her concerns about visiting the GP. It would probably help if it could be explained to the GP that she needed to visit, but due to the long wait which makes her very anxious she feels she cannot do so, I did this and they were very helpful, giving me the first appointment of the day to avoid to possibility of them running late. The other thing that MUST happen is to get your siblings to either help out financially, or move out! From my own experience, trying to deal with depression/anxiety on it's own is bad enough, but having additional money worries caused by family members makes it so much worse, and believe me something will eventually "give" and force the situation.
Best of luck trying to sort it out, but the sooner you can sort it, the better for your mum.

kj*daisy

She should contact the Council, if she is wanting to give up a 3 bed house for a 1 bed they will bite her hand off, they may even offer a financial incentive scheme such as help with moving. U could ring and enquire about that for her. Hope she gets sorted out.

immoral_angeluk

RAS wrote: »

Hi

This comes under the term elder abuse. Talk to Age UK (combine charity) about the issue. Try to the bigger branch in the area where you live or she lives, as they usually have more specialist advisors. You need to ask the doctors to make a home visit if mum is too anxious to cope with the surgery.

And certainly speak to CAP rather then CAB; one only a small percentage of CAB advisors have debt training and two, CAP do home visits and offer basic and enhanced support.

All generalist advisors have to undertake basic debt training before being allowed to advise clients. A smaller percentage of CAB advisors are specialist debt advisors with extensive specialist training/knowledge. Depending on the OP's local CAB they may also be in a position to do home visits.

learningtoridethewaves

I think your mum needs a 'floating support worker' they work with people around housing - they can also advise about money matters. They will be able to help your mum fill in a housing register form and help her to bid and ring the council on her behalf as long as she signs a permission letter. Perhaps contact contact mums council and ask whether they have a number. Or look on Supporting People Website.
Mum needs to access the doctor - could you ring the doctors surgery and ask for a home visit as she is depressed and anxious - maybe she may have a friend that could be with her? In my area there is an organisation called Rethink who will advocate for people with mental health issues - maybe contact Mind for advice? 1 in 3 people have mental health issues at some point in their lives - so no stigma!!!
Sounds like she needs support - perhaps Age Concern in her area can visit -I know shes not old! (they can also make sure she is receiving all she is entitled too)
Mum needs to take one step at a time, she must feel overwhelmed - support is key, there are agencies out there that will help.
Google the above suggestions and see where they lead.
I think if you also go to direct.gov.uk you will be able to input mums income - no need to give any personal info - make up something similar? Josephine Blogs similar birthdate, and she what shes entitled to.....go to benefits calculator (type in search bar)
And when its her birthday - buy her something to do - not something to have. Evening classes or something will get her out and about meeting people.
Best Wishes x