Help me help myself to get out of this hole!

thegirlintheattic

Have you got any neighbours that could check on the dogs?

Why can you not leave them alone? It's not ideal but I know several people who work full time and still have dogs.

Archer0710

I have tried to phrase this as best as I can, you need to look for a job with a decent wage, it is possible to work full time, have two dogs and a partner in the forces. Not easy but doable!

I know because I do it! Our dogs are very important but a colleague of mine said to me one day when I was stressed with DH being away and worried about my dogs she told me that in exchange for a warm, loving safe home, no abuse and plenty of food and care the dogs part of the bargain was to be alone sometimes. She made me realise that my dogs have a good life and I take them out morning and evening for a good walk, they get longer walks at the weekend and they manage just fine. They get more care and attention than some dogs whose owners are home all day. It's not ideal though but we manage.

I know the debt charities work well from the contact I have had with them through my job. I just wanted to say keep trying and with an understanding Oh when you are working again you can really make headways with the debt!

Malky

I'm with Archer0710. We have 3 dogs and work full-time. Granted, between us, we manage to get home at lunchtime to let them out so they're not left all day. Get a full-time job and you may well be able to afford a dog walker to come in once a day to take them out. Dogs soon get into a routine of you not being there at certain times of the day.

Archer0710

I have a dog flap!! If DH isn't home, dogs have permanent access to outside!! Not always possible I know!

curlytop12

think you will have to speak to one of the free advice companies-national debtline/CAB etc,and as soon as you have opened that new account.
how did OH look after dogs before you two met?
if you won't work full time,whilst owing others money,what about 2 or even 3 part-time jobs, e.g mornings and evenings or night shifts even?
i know its not easy in this job climate,but it can be done if you wish it to.
good luck,at least you are making positive steps !

LovelyLeeds

*KT* wrote: »

This site is not for judgement please remember.

You come across as rather harsh ampafc.

Nothing harsh about the advice at all - good, solid and practical advice.
I didn't see that there was any judgement being passed at all - just a piece of obvious advice.

Tebheag

Hi
There are lots of ways to work around dogs my mum has had 4 dogs and worked full time she is up at 6am walking the dogs gets home at lunch to let them out and is out walking them as soon as she gets home. As someone said you could always get two three part time jobs cleaning jobs in the morning for 3 hour shift shop work etc in the afternoon pub work in the evening just depends how hard you want to get rid of your debt I know some people may say I am being judgemental but I have not said anything about you not working for a year as sounds like you needed the me time to sort yourself out.
Also there are lots of dog walkers out there which is also a job you could consider doing. !
How would your OH feel about you filing for bankrupcy as sounds like he has been happily paying for things so that you could pay of your debt !

CH27

You cannot allow 2 dogs to dictate your working life.

*KT*

LovelyLeeds wrote: »

Nothing harsh about the advice at all - good, solid and practical advice.
I didn't see that there was any judgement being passed at all - just a piece of obvious advice.

The phrase "That's not good enough" was used. If that's not judgemental, what is? The points being made may well be valid but I felt the way it was being put across was harsh. In future I'll just stay quiet I think. It tends to be easier here...

findingmyownway

If I were in your position, I would be concerned at the lack of financial independence you seem to have.

You've already been through one relationship breakdown, which you partially blame for your debt problems. Hasn't that made you think about what would happen in that situation again? From your post it seems your OH is very supportive and helpful (which is great, obviously) but I do think you should be using this time when you are being financially 'looked after' by free accomodation etc to get yourself out of this hole.

How old are you? Where do you see your life going? I agree with the others that not working because you have 2 dogs at home is unrealistic if you have no other means of supporting yourself. Do you expect your OH to support you forever? You had a reasonably well paid job at one point...